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stateofzen

LAP-BAND Patients
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  1. Like
    stateofzen got a reaction from Phranp in Anxiety & 2nd thoughts.   
    You've gotten great advice here, and I would just reiterate the point that the surgery will be here when you are ready for it-- so make sure you're ready and it's the right decision for you.
    I think we've all been where you are, to varying degrees. I'll tell you, the thought of giving up Diet Dr. Pepper and beer forever seemed like a huge deal to me before surgery and I had a bit of a pity party over it. But it is seriously no big thing to me now. It was easier than I thought to give up both and I really don't miss it, especially when I consider all of the things I've gained in return. And I have gained a lot. I feel like I'm fully living my life now in ways I didn't even realize I was missing before. Just being able to comfortably move my body is amazing-- right now I am feeling some major abdominal soreness after belly dancing followed by yoga followed by Zumba-- but it feels awesome, especially compared to the real lower back pain and foot pain (plantar facitis) that I had before-- both of which are gone now after a 98 lb weight loss.
    The skin saggy-ness isn't great, I'm not going to lie. I will be having plastic surgery next summer if I'm at my goal by then to fix my stomach. But let's really be honest here-- how is saggy skin any less physically appealing than a big old fat filled belly of skin? If any of us are going into this merely for vanity reasons then it's probably not the right time to have the surgery. Vanity is part of it-- yes-- but it probably shouldn't be the primary driving force or the results may be somewhat disappointing. That said, I look soooo much better at 195 than I did at 293. Not perfect by any means, but pretty darn good and my husband definitely agrees. I totally understand worrying about the "new person" as opposed to the already-loves-you person, but there are new men who will be just as unconcerned with some saggy skin as there are new men who were just fine with the obesity. It's scary, but it doesn't have to be the thing that holds you back if you don't let it.
    As for being a successful dieter: Your story is the story of countless women who have been banded, and it's my story too. I am great at losing weight. I have been able to successfully exercise and diet my way down several times in my life. The thing I suck at, and the reason I got the band, is keeping the weight off. I had reached the point where I just gave up trying to lose weight-- what was the point if it just came back in no time and brought 20 more lbs along with it? The band is my "one last shot" and I got it because I truly wanted to have something that would help me really make a lifestyle change and stick with it forever, even when I was finished losing. We'll see if it works that way or not, but for me, that possibility was worth the try.
    With all of that said, if you still aren't ready by April-- that is ok. You don't have to rush into anything you're not sure about. For this surgery to be effective, it DOES require major life changes when it comes to food choices and it's hard to make the correct choices if your head isn't 100% in the game. So take more time to yourself to weigh the pros and cons (make a list- it will help) and maybe stop talking to this friend about it-- let her politely know you're not looking for outside opinions at this stage in the game. I'm sure whatever you decide will be the right choice for you.
  2. Like
    stateofzen reacted to Pinkygirl in one less bad food on my list!   
    Just because I said I Iove the wraps, doesnt mean I eat it everyday, CheckYes! ALMOST every post Spartan has is negative or being rude. Again, this is the internet but you can tell when one writes a certain way. Plus, this thread was supposed to be about if anyone had a favorite food that they can not eat anymore because of getting stuck. NOT because they chose not to have it. Again, obviously we are on this site and have lapband if we knew how to control our appetite and food choices in the first place.
    Im still waiting for Spartan to answer my previous question.................... I hope he/she got kicked off, cuz I know I clicked that negative button
  3. Like
    stateofzen reacted to jenn79co in one less bad food on my list!   
    I agree with you 100%.
    But this was not a post where the OP eats bad everyday.
    I see those posts also about eating whatever they want. Most of the time I ignore them or suggest lower calories or more exerciise. It's not my place or anyone elses to Judge them or make them feel stupid.
    Spartan more often than not makes awful comments than good ones. please don't defend him.
  4. Like
    stateofzen got a reaction from Melissannde in one less bad food on my list!   
    Hahaha-- Spartan, you're absolutely precious. Let me give you your official "food police" badge that you can wear attached firmly to your chest. You go, you born again food and fitness evangelist! Thank you for preaching to us sinners.

  5. Downvote
    stateofzen reacted to Spartan in one less bad food on my list!   
    "Why are you so bitchy?"
    Bitchy? Hardly. I merely have a great appreciation for REALITY.
    "So I guess you have NEVER eaten something, gotten stuck and said yeah i'm not going to eat that for a while?"
    Yes, I have, actually. But it was LETTUCE. It wasn't fries, or sausage, or a side of ribs. At first I could not eat lettuce. After a while it became easier. Now I LOVE it.

    So....you make your food choices based upon what gets stuck?? Huh? For real?
    Like I said…..jeez…..
    "Or you have never ever eaten something that wasnt the best choice?"
    Not for a number of years, no. I have learned how to make CHOICES that are in alignment with my commitment to being HEALTHY.
    "Somebody needs to get off their high horse......."
    Well, this "High Horse" I happen to be on would not have been able to hold me a few years ago when I weighed nearly TWO HUNDRED POUNDS more than I do now. But the horse and I get along very well now, thank you.
    I'll say it again…..sometimes I think that the Lap band actually cuts off the blood supply to some people's brains……
    S.
  6. Downvote
    stateofzen reacted to Manda87 in Getting back to cabbage meals!   
    Actually, it's not crap. It's really good advice. I am working very hard to lose weight. I work my butt off at the gym, and I actually eat right. My workouts are so intense, that I doubt you would last through one. I hardly give my Lap Band credit. It just makes me eat less. That's it. It doesn't help me run 4 miles nor does it help me choose carrot sticks over chocolate cake. My Lap Band gave me the motivation to change my lifestyle. I didn't get it so I could go on some stupid, pointless cabbage diet only to gain to back once I get off of it. I feel sorry for you. When you get off your cabbage diet, and gain your weight back, you'll be wanting advice. I am right, and you know it. Everyone here knows it.
  7. Like
    stateofzen reacted to TKW in I am Perfect   
    The hammer should work fine for you if you use it right, but if you just buy it and throw in on your work bench it probably isn't going to drive a whole lot of nails. You didn't buy the hammer thinking it would pound those nails without any effort from you did you?
  8. Downvote
    stateofzen reacted to mattie7632 in NOT WORKING!   
    OMG, I just knew the "it's a tool" people were gonna come and preach to you. So sick of that.
    Your fills are twice the cost of mine, and when they start coming out of my pocket I will be having a chat with the doc!!! Have you tried talking to him to give you more cc's in the fill, or maybe they will set up payments? Surgery is a lot of money and you should have your fills and get your money's worth!!!
  9. Like
    stateofzen reacted to HeatherinCA in What can you eat?   
    That seems too tight to me, if you can't eat solid protein... The fills just control your hunger. It's not supposed to restrict you from eating food.< /p>
  10. Like
    stateofzen got a reaction from JourneyGirl in NEVER, NEVER AGAIN....   
    Amen.
    I may desire to weigh 150 when this is all said and done, but even if I never lose another pound, the 90 that I've already lost have greatly changed my life and my health.
    And nobody can tell me that isn't a success story.
  11. Like
    stateofzen reacted to snowfie9 in NEVER, NEVER AGAIN....   
    Perhaps it is possible that only one or two in ten reach the DESIRED weight. But that doesn't make what weight loss they do achieve not worth the effort. I need to lose 120lbs. If I end up only losing 100, I'll consider that a monumental success. Whether I get as low as everyone tells me I should be or not.
  12. Downvote
    stateofzen reacted to RunDontwalkforlife in NEVER, NEVER AGAIN....   
    It is a wise decision to have the lap band removed, but it is not wise to have bypass surgery. Your problem is a lack of will power and self-discipline and no amount of surgeries, or even weight loss for that matter, will fix that. No one needs surgery to lose weight. You just have to be committed to living a healthy lifestyle and eating healthy food. Don't give up on yourself, all things can be done with Jesus helping you. Philippians 4:13
  13. Like
    stateofzen reacted to isit5yet in NEVER, NEVER AGAIN....   
    If anyone reads the Lap-Band documentation provided before surgery, they will see that Allergan states to expect to lose around 35% of the excess weight. The marker of success is subjective.. is it based on what someone's personal goals are, which may not line up with the expectations that should be set? For example, I know I need to lose 100lbs. Based on Allergan's data, I can expect to lose on average 35lbs - 35%.
    My physician's office provided their in-office data, which shows that on average their patients lose 60-65% of excess weight. So, my realistic goal would be to lose around 60-65lbs of the 100 I need to lose. If I expect to lose all 100, then I'm ignoring all of the research data and setting myself up for failure. Unfortunately, I think a lot of people do this.
  14. Downvote
    stateofzen reacted to happiness1 in How Can People Who Share the Same Struggle Be So Judgmental?   
    I agree.. some people are so rude!
  15. Like
    stateofzen reacted to TucsonAnnie in How Can People Who Share the Same Struggle Be So Judgmental?   
    Right on, Cleo's Mom!
    I have only posted a few times because of all the awful things I read here, and I figured about as much. When I see something hateful or spiteful, I click the red minus button. I wish more people would.
  16. Downvote
    stateofzen reacted to Blaze21 in Going to a Italian Resturant tonight...   
    Get a life!
  17. Like
    stateofzen reacted to honk in How Can People Who Share the Same Struggle Be So Judgmental?   
    <br /><br /><br /> I agree with Heather, there are times that I respond with a reality check. Normally this is in regards to people expressing behaviors that are likely to cause them physical harm. Some examples: I ate a Big Mac two days after surgery (not making that up), It's been 3 days since surgery and I'm starving so I ate nachos and chicken wings now I'm sick!. Not long ago there were several discussions about drinking alcohol after banding. Personaly I find that to be counter productive to dieting. I have never been a drinker so my responses were regarding calorie content. Some posters however made it into a morality discussion.
  18. Like
    stateofzen reacted to bigtom1948 in How Can People Who Share the Same Struggle Be So Judgmental?   
    I havn't seen the meaness that some of you have written about in this thread. I don't see flames or overtly devisive comments. I hope that I never do. If you do see someone being that preditory then it should be reported useing the little yellow triangle at the bottom of the posting. Because offensive, derogatory or hurtful posts really don't belong here.
    I do think that some folks are somewhat careless in the composition of thier responses. As said earlier in this thread its sometimes problomatic to convey intent in the text. This is especially true for the casual writer who may unintentionally offend the reader. I try very hard to write clearly and use the emoticons to support the intent. Even then, I sometimes make gaffs The emoticons, although not perfect, are useful.
    It's really unfortunate that most of us have fallen away from writing personal notes or letters to other folks. Its a skill honed with practice to a keen edge in hope that the reciever of the missive is not unsure of the intent of the sender. But, even with that there are players that like to lace thier prose with double meanings. I don't think that happens here. I believe it's just the lack of writing style and the use of sloppy syntax that we have nowadays.
    Most of the posts and responses are folks trying to be helpful and can be used or ignored at the will of the reader. I have seen some of the responses that appeared overly clinical while others seemed dismissive but all were trying in thier own way to be helpful
    I know I want encouragement and understanding when I am lost, afraid or need help and therefore I try to encourage and praise in my response to posts. I do not have the right to criticise other folks requests for help as failings when I have so often failed myself. It's just not right to do that. So to all of us in the journey, rally round, be brave, love yourselves and others and thus we all can move forward.
    God Bless
    Tom
  19. Like
    stateofzen got a reaction from CheckYes in Dissapointed- Need advice   
    I disagree with the idea that you need a fill, though you know better than I, obviously! If your current level of fill is keeping you from being hungry, but your problem is eating when not hungry, then I would suggest some practice of mindful eating rather than risk over-filling your band.
    This is what I mean by mindful eating: Forcing yourself to carefully consider the motivation behind every food choice. So, for example, when I go home this afternoon and I'm tempted to pull out the crackers and dip I have left-over from my SuperBowl party, I will ask myself this: "why do I want to eat this? am I hungry?" If the answer is no, I will make the choice not to eat it. If the answer is yes, I may eat it, or I might follow-up and ask if I could eat something else that would be a better choice.
    I know people differ on this, but for me, my long-term success is going to be dependent on me learning to look at food and hunger differently than I ever have before. In other words, make a permanent change in the reasons I eat. Otherwise, I know that I will eventually find a way to "outsmart" my band and gain it all back, whether because i choose to eat a lot of sliders or because I eventually stop maintaining the supertight fill level that would prevent me from eating or make it very uncomfortable or embarrassing (i.e. PBing and sliming all the time). For me, personally, I want my band to work by making it easier for me to make good choices because I'm not HUNGRY, not because it physically prevents me from eating food. I know others use their band in different ways so I'm not saying mine is the only way-- but I am saying that I believe that changing the psychological and behavioral approach to food is just as important as reducing the amount we eat in long-term success.
    Good luck to you-- just don't give up!
  20. Like
    stateofzen reacted to ElfiePoo in decided to do the Atkins diet   
    Responding to a couple posts.
    Atkins is not a fad diet. It does work long term. Of course people gain weight when they go off it...just as they gain weight when they go off Weight Watchers, Jenny Craig or any other WOE. It's not just about burning more calories than you take in. It's also about the type of calories you're eating. Why do you think band doctors are recommending low carb diets? Because they *know* that you will burn those calories faster than the higher carbs which your body is struggling to store as fat. Carbs have a stronger impact on the insulin response system than Protein and fat.
    No offense to the poster above who said they were on Atkins and eating less than 10 carbs, but if you're eating 10 carbs a day for 3 months, you weren't doing Atkins. Just trying to keep the record clear about Atkins. This WOE gets a lot of bad press from innocent comments such as this.
    I also did Atkins 9 years ago (thought it was 7 but just found a journal showing it was over 9!) for about 3 months. I found my critical carb level (the point where I stopped losing) was around 35 carbs per day. I'm extremely sensitive to carbs, although recently I've discovered it's not all carbs...just those in sugar and wheat products (bread, crackers, etc.). I never put that weight back on, most likely because it coincided with a point in my life when I became more physically active and have stayed active.
    The important thing to remember about Atkins is that (1) if you aren't eating vegies, you aren't doing Atkins and (2) drink at least 64 fl oz of Water per day because your body is in ketosis. Not a problem for healthy kidneys, but as my doc said at the time, it's still good to flush those ketones out with Water.
    .
  21. Like
    stateofzen reacted to JerseyGirl80 in Initial excitement is fleeting..   
    So I'm 7 weeks post-op and the initial excitement of being banded is fleeting. *big freakin' sigh* Am I alone in this? Does anyone else feel like they were super excited in the beginning and now it's just like, "ok , now what?" Friends and co-workers keep asking "how much have you lost?" and it's making me feel pressured. Every time I talk to them they ask and it's getting on my nerves because I see their puzzled faces when I don't have any big numbers to tell them. I feel like no one gets it, no one really understands the band, and I don't have the time or patience to explain every last detail of this process to every single person that asks. Grrrrrr!!!

    I knew all about bandster hell, which is where I am and I've accepted it so I don't need to be yelled at or lectured by all you snotty-better than everyone else-know it all-sitting on my high horse-senior bandsters, so save it, I don't need your negativity and neither does anyone else.

    Anyway, right now I'm feeling the need to whine, and you are the only people that can understand! I also get the fact that this isn't some magic pill and that I do need to work my butt off, and that's fine, it's really how I wanted to lose the weight anyway, but I'm just getting frustrated lately.


    I'm getting full faster, eating way less and eating the right things 98% of the time, but still getting a little hungrier between meals than I was a few weeks ago (especially in the last few days) and I could still eat like a linebacker if I really tried (even after my first fill on Jan 18th, which is normal, I know) but I don't eat that way in fear of barfing, again. I had my first meeting with the porcelain Gods the other day, that wasn't fun. It was my fault, ate too heavy too early in the day and got stuck on the 2nd bite. .Oh well, I survived, lesson learned.


    My weight is trickling off very very slowly especially in the last 2 weeks, but I was just hoping that I would have done better or would have found more motivation to work out by now. I really am happy that I have lost what I have lost, I'm just more upset with myself for not feeling more motivated. Again, my initial excitement is fleeting and I want it back. I was all gung ho and motivated to work out after surgery then within a month I fell back into my old lazy slump.

    I need some motivation and some accountability buddies! Thanks for reading my rant!




  22. Like
    stateofzen reacted to cantdecide in Help me understand   
    I think it is human nature for many people to be ambivilent about many decisions. As a psychologist, I see people ambivilent about a marriage even right after they were married. This doesn't mean it was a mistake. It just means that they are acknowledging both sides of their psyche. I think anytime we ignore one side of what we are feeling we are setting ourselves up for failure. I think real strength is acknowleging the whole range of our experience and human feelings and then making a decision based on all sides. Just my two cents.
  23. Like
    stateofzen got a reaction from glam_gabbi in Tummy tucks and boob jobs   
    I plan on a Tummy Tuck, because I'll most likely have an "apron" of excess skin and I don't think I can live with that. My boobs will be very saggy as well, but with a good bra, they look fine and I don't really think my husband will care so it wouldn't be worth the money to us.
  24. Like
    stateofzen reacted to Spartan in Still hate my band   
    Swirl;
    The "experts" here have weighed in and done their usual damage.
    It's too bad I went on vacation. It might have been fun to get in on this one.
    This place is like a Box of hamsters. Pure comedy.
    People love to compartmentalize the Band experience into neat little boxes. It works like "THIS". "THIS" is what you have to do. "THIS" is what you should eat. "THIS" is what you shouldn't eat. It's "all" about the Calories. It's "all" about the Vagus nerve. And if you don't do it exactly THEIR way, well, you're doing it wrong. And much of what people think/say is baloney. And the REASON it's baloney is that the same process does not work for everyone. I believe it was Cleo's Mom who stated (correctly) that the Lap Band works in different ways for different people. And that is true. There ARE some absolutes, though, that everyone should do/not do. But even those are disagreed upon here.
    It might be entirely possible that you would have been better served by having another type of surgery, such as the Gastric Bypass. The various types of Weight Loss Surgery are all different….and meant for different people, with different eating, weight, and metabolic issues. So, it might not be a problem with the Lap Band. It might be that it was not the right surgery for YOU. SO many times on this forum, I see people describing the problem they are having with the Lap band, and it is so clear and apparent from what they say that a Bypass would have been better for them. But, I usually don't say anything because it is not always a pleasant thing to hear. And, well...they already HAVE the Lap Band, so why not do all you can with it?
    People do NOT put nearly enough work into the discovery portion of the WLS process. They see the ads on TV, Billboards, and Bus Benches about how easy it is to lose weight with the lap band. And...they simply go ahead and DO it, without seriously looking at the alternatives, or perform the due diligence and choose the RIGHT Bariatric professional to advise them.
    With regard to your original comment, the Lap band does NOT work for everyone. That is absolutely true. And when it does work, it doesn't always work that well. People who are having success with the Lap Band HATE it when someone suggests that the Lap Band might have problems, most likely because they fear that THEY might suffer erosion, or slippage, or another of the problems that have been associated with the Band. A classic case of "shoot the messenger".
    But, as others here have said, the patient DOES play a significant role in the efficacy of ANY WLS. You DO need to make certain that you have done ALL you can to make it work.
    Weight Loss Surgery is an INDUSTRY. It is full of crooks, thieves, sleazy marketing types, and "Patient Coordinators" (Pimps).
    It is filled with half-witted money-hungry doctors who have jumped on the Lap band gravy train in order to line their already bulging pockets some more of YOUR money. There are plenty of inexperienced Doctors performing this surgery, and they really don't care if it's the RIGHT surgery for you or not. Just as long as you PAY them to perform it.
    But...there are also some wonderful, experienced, caring Doctors that really only want what is BEST for their patients. And part of YOUR job as a potential WLS patient is to find the Surgeon that will give you what you NEED….which might not necessarily be what you WANT...
    The Lap Band industry makes it seem all so easy. In and out in a few hours. Go Home. Lose Weight. Done.
    Of course, it does not work that way at ALL.
    Here are some simple facts about the Lap band:
    MOST people who have the lap band will lose SOME weight.

    SOME people will lose very little or virtually no weight.

    A small percentage (thought to be single-digit) will lose all the weight they want.

    For some, the Lap Band is a remarkable, life-changing experience, providing a new lease on life. For many others, it is a mind-numbingly brutal experience, filled with disappointment, pain, financial loss, and sometimes disastrous health consequences.
    Of course, MOST people's experience falls somewhere in the middle, usually toward the part where they don't lose nearly as much as they want.
    I think that it is important, though, that you maximize the investment you have made in time and effort and money and make certain that this is, in fact, the case.
    The Reality of the band is that there are many, many factors in play that determine whether or not it will be successful in any given patient.
    My suggestion to you at this point: Get a second opinion. Find another EXERIENCED surgeon, someone who has a demonstrable track record of success with multiple WLS procedures. Have them do a complete review of your case. They might find something that can turn this around. I have seen it happen before.
    Remember: you can always revise to another WLS. There is a long-time member of this forum, someone who is very highly regarded here. She has nearly 7 thousand posts, and is considered to be one of the best WLS information sources here. She was considered to be something of a "champion" of the Lap Band. She struggled with her lap band a LOT..then she began to have some success, but it was HARD. Very hard. Finally, her band slipped. She decided that she was done with the process, and she had a gastric bypass. It turned out that IT was what she needed all along, and she is very happy that she had the revision.
    It MAY be that this is what you might have to do.
    But, I would seriously suggest that you seek out another opinion. I do believe what your surgeon said, though. Many surgeons are echoing his sentiment. Some people on this forum don't like it. But, it is what it is.

    S.
  25. Like
    stateofzen reacted to Phranp in Ugh can't believe I'm posting this :-(   
    Juliansmom, take a breath and relax. While it is true that since you are so close to goal you may need an adjustment, you may also need to adjust your thinking. Your "irregular eating" while on the business trip is NOT punishable by law. LOL You HAVE been and STILL ARE a success story! You give good advice and now you have a new and different experience to share with others. We both know that you will get back on the wagon and continue to lose more weight.
    I would bet my paycheck that you have not stretched your pouch. Yeah, I know, my paycheck wouldn't pay for a European vacation, but still ... LOL I think it takes more that one weekend and 3 glasses of bubbly to stretch your pouch. If you want to put your mind at ease, why not try the "5-day pouch test" and see if you don't feel restriction again. Just a suggestion.
    No one is perfect and no one is expected to be perfect. You are doing great. Keep up the good work.
    Trust me, the things I have put my band through ... and still my pouch bounces back and tells me STOP, I'M FULL!!!
    Take care!
    ~Fran

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