Queen ApisM

I agree with what @LookingForward22 said regarding finding the right program. I also switched programs and even though it really extended my timeline, I am so happy I did.
I would also say: research all options (bypass, sleeve) but don't get railroaded or let others convince you of which one is right for you. I always preferred the sleeve, but tried to convince myself that a bypass was better. I was doing all the mental gymnastics for it - it would be faster weight loss (not necessarily true), more weight lost (also not necessarily true) - when in my heart I was not comfortable with re-routing my insides so much and I wanted to still have a pyloric valve. It was so liberating when a surgeon reminded me it is simply a tool and will be as successful as you make it. He wasn't trying to tell me what to do, just to make sure my decision fit my needs and comfort level. That was so important. I personally have no preference for others, just make certain you are an informed recipient of the surgery you get and are 100% on board with the decision and the inherent risks for both (as there are differing risks for each type). Sleeve brings risks of GERD (and is contraindicated for anyone with GERD already) but bypass has other risks. Neither set of risks makes one inherently better or worse - you just need to be aware and ready to accept those risks.
And don't get surgery until you are mentally ready for it. That's just good advice across the board. You need to be in the right mindset to make it work.
Good luck!

I was working out before surgery. For the first 2 months post surgery, I just walked. I did not have the energy to work out more significant until I was eating more calories (and my program did not encourage it until we were able to eat 800-1000 cals/day consistently. I didn't start back with my trainer until 7 or 8 weeks out from surgery, and then we adjusted my weights down since I hadn't been lifting in a while. We were also really careful with the ab work for the first few weeks back since again, I hadn't been doing anything for a while and I'd had surgery!

I have dilated cardiomyopathy. My cardiologist also was the one who really encouraged the surgery. So far, we haven't seen any crazy change in my ejection fractions, but we will see in June at my next echo. By then I would have been down more than 120 lbs for more than a year, so he is eager to see if there will have been any changes to my heart function.
Having said that, I have had to reduce my BP meds quite a bit, so that's good. But, we are trying not to reduce them too much since they help with my DCM.

Definitely check what would work for the eval. For example, I was already seeing a therapist, who assumed I needed to go through a special battery of testing/questions. The surgeon's office clarified that she just needed to write a letter addressing specific concerns, which she was able to do just based on our ongoing work.
Good luck!

I got the sleeve, and I will admit, sometimes I wonder "would my weight loss be faster with the bypass?" Especially times like now, when I am dealing with slowed down weight loss even though I am sticking to program. But then, when I really analyze it, I don't think I would be doing anything differently than I am now. I'd still be eating the same amount of calories, per my program's advice. I would be working out the same amount I am now. So, the tool would be different but I'm not sure I would be doing anything differently as a result so in the end, does it matter? People do incredibly well with both surgeries, and others "fail" with both options (I'm using fail loosely, but basically to mean not reach their goals or even much weight loss with either surgery).
It's easy to get caught up in this sort of thinking, so I try not to do it. Especially because I am totally at peace with the sleeve (I was not so keen on bypass unless I needed to do it based on medical advice). I just have to use the tool as intended.

As a guy, I’d like to know…especially in a growing relationship.
Look at it this way, if you tell him, and he is not receptive, do you want that in your relationship? If you tell him, and he’s receptive, it’s another step towards intimacy in your growing relationship and proof he’s a keeper. The longer you wait, the more you risk TRUST.
Lying is no way to start any relationship.

Definitely check what would work for the eval. For example, I was already seeing a therapist, who assumed I needed to go through a special battery of testing/questions. The surgeon's office clarified that she just needed to write a letter addressing specific concerns, which she was able to do just based on our ongoing work.
Good luck!

I'm sorry you are experiencing this. I have been lucky - so far. People have commented that I look great, that sort of thing, but no one has crossed a line. Having said that, I definitely have avoided people who would make those comments partly because they are toxic people and I know it ahead of time. In fact I was just at an industry gathering and actively avoided an old coworker because she is a gossip who would ask really obnoxious questions and then talk about me with others. Not going to entertain that crap.
Thanksgiving will be interesting as I will see extended family and I am quite a lot thinner than the last times they saw me. I'll deal with them if and when it comes up. At least with truly toxic people you can try and avoid them, but then there are the ones who are wildcards and you can't do anything to evade that sort of thing.

I'm sorry you are experiencing this. I have been lucky - so far. People have commented that I look great, that sort of thing, but no one has crossed a line. Having said that, I definitely have avoided people who would make those comments partly because they are toxic people and I know it ahead of time. In fact I was just at an industry gathering and actively avoided an old coworker because she is a gossip who would ask really obnoxious questions and then talk about me with others. Not going to entertain that crap.
Thanksgiving will be interesting as I will see extended family and I am quite a lot thinner than the last times they saw me. I'll deal with them if and when it comes up. At least with truly toxic people you can try and avoid them, but then there are the ones who are wildcards and you can't do anything to evade that sort of thing.

I plan to do what I did last year: try (taste) everything I'm excited about, and then based on how good it tastes, decide which ones get some of my precious tummy space. Last Thanksgiving I had just transitioned to solid foods and this was also my approach. It worked great. Obviously if you are not on solids yet that changes the equation quite a bit. No meal is worth potentially affecting the healing process.
Honestly the only things I care about at Thanksgiving are stuffing and pumpkin pie. So, planning for some of each. And already scheming about how to keep active while visiting not so active family members.

I plan to do what I did last year: try (taste) everything I'm excited about, and then based on how good it tastes, decide which ones get some of my precious tummy space. Last Thanksgiving I had just transitioned to solid foods and this was also my approach. It worked great. Obviously if you are not on solids yet that changes the equation quite a bit. No meal is worth potentially affecting the healing process.
Honestly the only things I care about at Thanksgiving are stuffing and pumpkin pie. So, planning for some of each. And already scheming about how to keep active while visiting not so active family members.

I had this happen at about 100 lbs lost. Went to a meeting and someone I hadn't seen in more than year (from a previous employer) was amazed and clearly wanted to ask a lot of questions. It was very reaffirming because sometimes it is hard to see the changes on a day to day basis. Most people don't mention my weight directly, but a lot of comments about how I look amazing or look really different. If I ever get close to my goal (in another 100 lbs) I'm sure the reactions will be even more pronounced.

I had this happen at about 100 lbs lost. Went to a meeting and someone I hadn't seen in more than year (from a previous employer) was amazed and clearly wanted to ask a lot of questions. It was very reaffirming because sometimes it is hard to see the changes on a day to day basis. Most people don't mention my weight directly, but a lot of comments about how I look amazing or look really different. If I ever get close to my goal (in another 100 lbs) I'm sure the reactions will be even more pronounced.

Agree with everything @kcuster83 said above. I love Crystal Light, but had to stay away the first few days after surgery. It was just too harsh immediately after surgery, but a week or two in it was totally fine. You may need to experiment. I wound up drinking a lot of warm Bone Broth, which was great because it has more Protein than regular broth, felt nice in my tummy, and also counted for Fluid.
I also used to love all the Premier Protein shakes, and post op I hated everything except the vanilla which was tolerable. The Caffe Latte is also delicious but I couldn't drink it for the first 6 months because of the caffeine. I switched to Unjury protein powders in soy milk. Yum.

Agree with everything @kcuster83 said above. I love Crystal Light, but had to stay away the first few days after surgery. It was just too harsh immediately after surgery, but a week or two in it was totally fine. You may need to experiment. I wound up drinking a lot of warm Bone Broth, which was great because it has more Protein than regular broth, felt nice in my tummy, and also counted for Fluid.
I also used to love all the Premier Protein shakes, and post op I hated everything except the vanilla which was tolerable. The Caffe Latte is also delicious but I couldn't drink it for the first 6 months because of the caffeine. I switched to Unjury protein powders in soy milk. Yum.

This. I fit this pattern to a T. I am 14 months out. I'm working out hard, tracking calories, and have dropped into the 4-5 bs a month range. The fast loss is only at the very beginning for most people, and will slow down. You will have stalls and it will be frustrating unless you are someone very lucky. This is a long game, not a quick fix by any means.

Agree with everything @kcuster83 said above. I love Crystal Light, but had to stay away the first few days after surgery. It was just too harsh immediately after surgery, but a week or two in it was totally fine. You may need to experiment. I wound up drinking a lot of warm Bone Broth, which was great because it has more Protein than regular broth, felt nice in my tummy, and also counted for Fluid.
I also used to love all the Premier Protein shakes, and post op I hated everything except the vanilla which was tolerable. The Caffe Latte is also delicious but I couldn't drink it for the first 6 months because of the caffeine. I switched to Unjury protein powders in soy milk. Yum.

I wanted to add, I wound up asking for an electric blanket last year for Christmas. I got two, and it's the best. I keep one in my room, and one in the basement. I don't need them all the time, but when I am REALLY cold and nothing else is helping, the electric blanket is awesome.

The struggle is real. I'm constantly freezing and I am by no way a thin woman. It's been a constant since surgery. That didn't used to be my life, I used to always be hot.

I wanted to add, I wound up asking for an electric blanket last year for Christmas. I got two, and it's the best. I keep one in my room, and one in the basement. I don't need them all the time, but when I am REALLY cold and nothing else is helping, the electric blanket is awesome.

I cannot imagine working out in something that constricting. I've got to be able to move!

I wanted to add, I wound up asking for an electric blanket last year for Christmas. I got two, and it's the best. I keep one in my room, and one in the basement. I don't need them all the time, but when I am REALLY cold and nothing else is helping, the electric blanket is awesome.

I wanted to add, I wound up asking for an electric blanket last year for Christmas. I got two, and it's the best. I keep one in my room, and one in the basement. I don't need them all the time, but when I am REALLY cold and nothing else is helping, the electric blanket is awesome.

The struggle is real. I'm constantly freezing and I am by no way a thin woman. It's been a constant since surgery. That didn't used to be my life, I used to always be hot.

Alrighty hive mind, I could use some advice. I've lost 120 lbs, and while I still have a long way to go, my exercise game is improving greatly. I've been challenging myself and slowly starting to add in some plyo/jumping moves. I'm very cautious and careful about it, because I haven't jumped in years but I can do it a bit and I am slowly pushing my boundaries and comfort levels, which is awesome.
Less awesome? How my extra skin and fat literally flap when I try to do anything involving jumping or even anything too quick, like if I am doing some agility work. It is uncomfortable and sounds awful. Any ideas or recommendations on how people have reined it in? Wearing tighter exercise pants isn't enough, at least not the ones I am wearing from the common US plus size shops. Does anyone have a good brand they feel helps with this? Or any other recommendations on compression gear to help with this? I don't want to feel like a stuffed potato while working out, but the flapping doesn't really great for bringing out my exercise best.