DoodlesMom

Less than 2 weeks? That's impressive! I'm on the waitlist and have my ringer on maximum in case they call. Fingers crossed. I have been thinking about another program. When I researched, there are two locally that I really liked. I have plenty of time to do it, so maybe it is worth it to see if I can get an earlier appointment.

Wow, that's really great. Hopefully, you'll be able to move through your requirements quickly. It seems like there is a big demand for services. I wish the clinics/hospitals had the resources to expand.

I wish you didn't have to deal with this, no wonder you're frustrated. It sounds like you're in a real tough spot here. So, you either have to continue waiting or move on. I guess the result of them failing to get paperwork submitted is it's giving you time to decide what you want to do. Whatever you decide, trust yourself on what's best.

That's right, no looking backward. I learned a lot from the experience. Hopefully, this is a reminder of how crucial it is to find a care team that we can communicate with and one where we feel heard.

Thanks for sharing.

Delayed surgeries are another unfortunate consequence of Covid. I'm glad you were able to find a different surgeon and hospital. 🙂

I wish there were a way to streamline the process. That's great that you were able to get in sooner with the psychologist.

Thanks so much for sharing. I can absolutely relate to questions and concerns going unanswered. I went through the weight management program with Allina. In the beginning, I felt supported and heard. As I progressed through the program I was able to get a handle on my eating and increase exercise. I felt good. I followed calorie counts, diet, vitamins, and exercise which led to meeting weight loss goals (which were steep) every month for nearly a year. Like you, I was getting contradictory advice from my therapist and dietitian. That took some navigating. Physician and dietician visits began to feel impersonal and rushed and I wasn't getting much out of them. These are a few contradictory statements I was told: Weigh yourself every day--no don't weigh yourself every day Track calories and weigh portions-- don't count calories instead focus on hunger cues It's ok to have a 100 calorie treat a day-- reward yourself with a treat at the end of the week if you've maintained your diet On my last visit, my Dr. said the dietician had seen concerning calorie counts in my food journal. I was confused because I had kept with the 1200 calorie a day diet that she had recommended and as I said, was meeting weight goals. Also, she hadn't asked to see my food journal in 3 visits/ 3 months. I was floored and confused. I was following the diet they told me to and they waited 3 months to tell me they had concerns!?? What?? I thought there was a misunderstanding so I tried to explain-- this is what you told me to eat, I'm doing what you told me to, you haven't looked at my journal the last 3 visits. They wouldn't hear me. Even my therapist contacted them to say I was doing well and asked them to reconsider. I was kicked out of the program until I completed an ED assessment. At the time, there was a lot of shuffling happening in the organization, maybe that had something to do with it. Regardless, I felt bullied and abandoned. I continued seeing the therapist so I didn't slip back into eating when stressed. The whole situation was really disappointing because I have read a few positive experiences on this forum about Allina, that just wasn't mine. On a positive note, my experience with my therapist was good overall. I learned methods that have stuck with me. Again thanks so much for sharing. It's helpful to hear I wasn't the only one with a less than great experience. I hope everyone gets the absolute best care no matter where they go. Good luck! I hope you're doing amazing!

Sooo snarky, I love it!

I bet that felt like a gut punch. I would be annoyed too. That's not supportive or helpful. Sometimes when people don't know what to say they think about someone they know and their experience but everyone's experience is their own. You will have your own surgeon and nurses. You likely had an entire care team that prepared you for this. The mom's friend's situation is not an indicator of how your surgery will go. I'm sorry she texted that to you, no one wants to be reminded of that possibility right before surgery. Best of luck on Wednesday. This is a stressful time, but you will through this.

Sorry, you're having a rough time. It's easy to get discouraged when you're doing everything right and the scale isn't moving in the right direction. I hope your hard work starts to pay off soon.

I would be nervous too. Everything will be okay and it will all be worth it.😄 Good luck!

Keeping temptation out of the house is a great point. That's something I need to work on.

My partners eating habits aren't great. He mostly eats pizza, bagels, pasta, chicken fingers, peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, and bananas. He doesn't have much variety in his diet or eat many fruits and veggies. He's about 20-25 pounds overweight. In the last few years, I've noticed the --"Why is he with you, I don't get it." look when meeting new people. He has a physical job so that keeps his weight down. Luckily, I don't like much of what he does and that goes for sweets too. He likes sour and citrus and I like chocolate. His habits do inspire me to improve. When you open our fridge or pantry you'd see, "His food", as listed above, and "My food", which is blueberries, clementines, salad, tomatoes, eggs, fish, frozen dinners --and my sweets. Chocolate is my downfall. He used to enable bad choices by surprising me with candy bars and other treats a lot. I've been able to mostly break him of the habit. Now, he shows his love by doing the laundry and dishes when it's not his turn. Score! One challenge I've faced pre-Covid is he likes to go out to eat or get takeout 1-2 times a week. It does make me feel less engaged in the experience when I don't eat the same food as him. Sometimes I get jealous too that he gets to eat what h wants. When it comes time to order, it can be hard to make the right choice especially when he can eat as much and whatever he wants.

I can relate. I'd be fine to go the rest of my life without another well-meaning, judgemental, rude, and naive comment. I've told my mom, mother-in-law, husband, and two friends. All have been incredibly supportive except for one of my friends. A year ago when I mentioned I was thinking about surgery she said I was "Just bored" and looking for something to do. That really hurt and I haven't talked with her about it since. I don't plan to tell anyone else. There can be some negative reactions. We just have to choose wisely if we do tell, and not let bummer opinions slow our momentum.

Understandably, you'd feel defeated. It sounds like you've had one frustration after another. I'm sorry for that. I like LoveSimcha's idea of finding a student health plan that covers the surgery. If you can make it work, that's a great option. Even if your insurer won't pay for surgery, they may pay for preop assessments if the provider is in-network. Getting a sleep study, labs, psychotherapy, dietitian visits, and a medically supervised weight loss program covered, your physician just needs to prove medical necessity for those services. Do you have a Health Saving Account or a Flex Spending Account? If you do, you could use this. I know it wouldn't cover it all but it could soften the blow. Medicaid covers weight loss surgery if the facility has the Bariatric Center of Excellence designation and the recipient has a BMI of 35 or higher with one comorbidity and a previous medical weight loss attempt. Do you or your partner's employer offer benefits to part-timers? If not, you could request to temporally reduce your hours and apply for Medicaid the day after your coverage expires. Medicaid coverage begins the day you apply. Income limits depend on if you are single or married. You'd need to determine yours and reduce your income enough to meet eligibility. Lastly, you could check your state's marketplace for a private insurer or pull from your 401(k). I know it's not ideal, and you could take a financial hit, but it could be an option. I hope this helps. I know this situation is disappointing. Please don't give up, you can make this happen. 😊

Our stats are very similar. I'm 4'11 and I'm at my highest weight of 218. 70 extra pounds is a lot to carry around on our small frames. Thinking back to when I was a healthy weight: I had the energy to be involved socially and participate in activities I was more present in my relationships and that made me a better wife, mother, and friend Since the weight gain, I've experienced back and joint pain, and now mobility is starting to be affected. Like you, I also have a few comorbidities. The progression has been predictable. First no symptoms, next from mild to moderate, and lastly severe. These are a few critical questions I asked myself when deciding to pursue surgery and the answers are what keep me moving forward: How satisfied are you with your physical health? How will that satisfaction be affected if other comorbidities develop? Is there a chance I will lose the ability to remain independent or care for myself if I continue on this path? As others have said, it's important to ask if the risks of obesity such as high cholesterol, cancers, heart disease, stroke, gallbladder/gallstones outweigh the benefits like freedom from or reduced impact from diseases, a longer life span, improved personal relationships, and better mental health. Self-reflection is important. Maybe along the way you've forgotten what your motivation is or it's changed. Why did you start this process in the first place? Is what motivated you then still relevant now? Whatever you decide, please don't punish yourself, it will erode your confidence.

Thanks Jnfinney, it sounds like you had a wait too. I just talked with the scheduler for my program she says they are completely booked through the end of May. I was able to get myself on a waitlist which I'm happy about. I picked this program for a reason, I'm just going to use the time to learn as much as I possibly can and start a list of questions. You were okay with the wait, I'm going to think positively and get ok with it too. Thanks again.

Thanks NovaLuna, it seems like my nearly 3-month wait is excessive. I chose the program I did because it's comprehensive. Looks like others thought that too!😊

Thanks for sharing LoveSimcha. I will call and see if there is any way to move up the consult.