Who'sThere

Hahahahaha! I know! I'm afraid if I "finished" I would hurt myself. Sent from my SAMSUNG-SM-G890A using the BariatricPal App

Well, that doesn't sound pleasant. I hope it's not months tho. Not that anal is at the top of our menu, but I don't want to be inhibited. We are very spontaneous in the bedroom...or out. Lol Sent from my SAMSUNG-SM-G890A using the BariatricPal App

So, I've read posts where people said they had sex at a couple days post op. One post I read said they did it while patient was still in the hospital.
I have a very healthy (or maybe even so high it's unhealthy) sexual appetite. I could go at it all day most every day.
Today is day 4 post op, and while the idea of certain favors does greatly appeal to me in my head, my body would disagree. And I have had a pretty good recovery. Nearly no pain at all. Zero pain meds since the day after surgery. But intercourse??? No way! Now, I could give him pleasure, but that's about it.
So, I'm calling bs. I'd say "Pics or it didn't happen," but I don't think that's allowed. Lol
Sent from my SAMSUNG-SM-G890A using the BariatricPal App

I'll have to buy gas x strips. We only get to see each other 5-6 times a year. I don't wanna miss a thing. Lol. Sent from my SAMSUNG-SM-G890A using the BariatricPal App

So, I've read posts where people said they had sex at a couple days post op. One post I read said they did it while patient was still in the hospital.
I have a very healthy (or maybe even so high it's unhealthy) sexual appetite. I could go at it all day most every day.
Today is day 4 post op, and while the idea of certain favors does greatly appeal to me in my head, my body would disagree. And I have had a pretty good recovery. Nearly no pain at all. Zero pain meds since the day after surgery. But intercourse??? No way! Now, I could give him pleasure, but that's about it.
So, I'm calling bs. I'd say "Pics or it didn't happen," but I don't think that's allowed. Lol
Sent from my SAMSUNG-SM-G890A using the BariatricPal App

I will say that today, my desire returned but only in my head. I told him in detail what I dreamed about. Then said, it would prob be more like a cuddle on the couch where I let you play with my boobs. Lol.
Sent from my SAMSUNG-SM-G890A using the BariatricPal App

Hahahahaha! I know! I'm afraid if I "finished" I would hurt myself. Sent from my SAMSUNG-SM-G890A using the BariatricPal App

I got one for my birthday, and I love it!
Sent from my SAMSUNG-SM-G890A using the BariatricPal App

Yes. However, let me give you this cautionary tale.
I have trouble with low BP. (I know that seems weird for a big person, but I'm weird, lol) I have a history of passing out during weightloss from low bp. This happened to me as soon as I came home from the hospital. We talked to our program's bariatric nurse and she suggested a few things to help, one of which was to drink Powerade Zero in place of Water to raise my sodium. I did the things she suggested, and only passed out once more.
Fast forward to one day shy of my 3 week mark, and I had a visit to my surgeon. He was happy with all my progress and asked how I felt. I told him I felt great except that I had only had 1 bowel movement since surgery despite taking Miralax to help. He told me he told the nurse to correct her information. He said my Constipation was likely exacerbated by the Powerade replacing Water. He said that the artificial sweeteners in it acts as a diuretic, and that 12 oz of PZ can make you evacuate as much as 48 oz of water!
My point is, yes, it's fine but don't overdo it. You don't want to get constipated.
I switched back to water and continued miralax. I had to take one dose of MoM, but I am finally straightened out now. (4 weeks and 1 day since surgery)
Sent from my SAMSUNG-SM-G890A using the BariatricPal App

@@WLSResources/ClothingExch - You brought up a valid point, which I was not focused on. And that is the value of honest discussion.

Well you guys it was OK while it lasted. I had posts on my surgery in Mexico completely disappear from here. I can only assume that because it didn't support this site that it was removed. This truly upset me.
I'm also on Obesity Help but I don't care for the format. After today's incident, I'm done here.

Babbs is gone too? If so, I'm out. That's ridiculous! Sent from my SAMSUNG-SM-G890A using the BariatricPal App

Not much at all...............only that some of the folks that were honest with me.....gave me the jolts of truth and challenged me......helped direct me to change my thinking and behaviors..........helped me extend my life....which was soon to end....and now I feel like I'll live forever since taking their advice.........yeah...those people have been permanently banned.
Not much has happened.
Sadly.....the loss will impact the very newbies that are posting in this thread the most. I was one of them this time a year ago. I wish them well and hope that they can sift through the bs and find some real solid advice from some real solid veterans. There truly aren't many left and it is a poor reflection of what this place is becoming.

Oh, Alex. "terrorize"? Really?
Look, I'm not as outraged as some people are, and I'm not demanding that you delete my account. You're running a business and it's been helpful for me. But, it would be great if you'd not use that kind of language. I'm a military veteran, married to an active duty soldier and believe me, there's not one iota of terrorizing going on here. Bullied, maybe. Terrorized? Don't make me laugh.
The people you just either banned or caused to leave are the reason I'm here and the reason many people are here...I get NOTHING from newbies eating pizza in their bathrooms so their spouses don't know they're 'cheating'. But when LL slapped me upside my virtual head when I asked about wine at 6 weeks post-op? THAT helped. AND, it made me think 'hey, my team was wrong about BP, there are some nuggets of wisdom to be gleaned there'...I hate that they were right, and I'm going to have to admit it at my real-life support group meeting next week.
The snowflakes have had their fun, and when they all leave because they've hit goal or stopped losing because of their crappy habits, it's going to be sad and lonely around here...you may have 310,273 accounts (which we now understand to mean 'anyone who ever signed up, ever'), but you probably have about 50 active posters and about 100 more who drop in from time to time, in the sleeve forums. That's not a robust readership, by any means. I'm sad to see this, and although I may stick around for a while, it's only because of 2 or 3 people who I think need support...there's no support left here for me. And I'm going to buy my Vitamins, Proteins and Moon cheese elsewhere...I never get free shipping anyway.

@@WLSResources/ClothingExch I LOVE your ability to turn a phrase <3 I might stay around just for you...we can exchange salacious private messages to titillate our moderators

EVERY SINGLE POSTER, without exception, who have defended Alex's decisions have joined within the past 6 months. If that doesn't speak volumes about the type of member being courted by this site I don't know what would. Veterans who have met goal do not spend $$ in the store, or support recommended surgeons/healthcare facilities (Medical Tourism).
Gone is the experience the veterans so freely shared. Sure, their advice was not always rainbows and unicorns, but it was truthful.
Some of us do NOT want coddled, we want help on this journey. We want information that can ONLY come from those that have lived it!
Although this is my first post, I have been lurking, reading & researching for over a year.

@Alex Breacher... please delete the accounts for those who want to leave. You don't want us here and we don't want to be here. If it is about member numbers new ones will replace us ina few weeks. FYI this is my official request to be deleted. Deleting posts was bad... banning people terrible but reading PMs is beyond unacceptable.

From LipstickLady:
**I am PISSED that he implied that I was part of any backyard bullying club. Not only would I **never** do that, but I've known for a good year that he was reading PMs so if I was going to do that, it certainly wouldn't be there. I would be THRILLED if one of you posted THIS EXACT MESSAGE in that thread and say that it was from me.**
Alex, wtf? How can anyone find this place to be a 'safe space' if we're subject to outright lies being told about us? I'm completely bewildered by your unprecedented breach of normal website behavior...since when do site owners a) read private messages and then comment on the content of said PMs publicly?

I think you've painted yourself into a corner here. What I don't understand is WHY you've done it.

On every other forum I have ever been on in the past 20 years, private messages have been inviolate. If they were shared by one of the parties to the message, that is one thing. To have someone not party to a discussion reading it without permission smacks of intrusion which has been considered abhorrent by virtually every generation preceding ours.

I didn't know the PM's were visible, though I should have thought so. I hope those do stay deleted. Some were very personal (hence they were "private") and some downright salacious. I have one out to Dub, and I'll delete that tomorrow and stick to using PM to see if someone wants to exchange email addresses to carry on private conversations.

But the blockbuster is your admission (long suspected by me) that you read BP members' private messages. IMO reading members' private messages is a significant ethical violation by any message board operator. Those who choose to remain here need to understand that clearly.
This. Right. Here.

I haven't been on this site in about six months. But after this latest idiocy, I'm finally ready to delete my account.
Yes, Alec, as the owner and operator of this message board you can do anything you want to do with this board.
However, your posts in this thread mischaracterize the ways in which this board's culture and the value it offers WLS patients have declined for some time.
But the blockbuster is your admission (long suspected by me) that you read BP members' private messages. IMO reading members' private messages is a significant ethical violation by any message board operator. Those who choose to remain here need to understand that clearly.
These days there are so many other social media options for support of WLS patients. I urge those leaving BP to explore them all.
I expect that my and some others' opinions will soon vanish when Alex heavily edits or deletes this thread, just as he has deleted other comments and BP threads where members have expressed their opinions about BP's culture and operational policies. But I've bothered to type them anyway.
In closing, I would like to thank the many WLS patients here who contributed to my WLS success (I've lost 100 pounds and have maintained my weight loss for longer than a year). I also thank those who invited my input and who appreciated the help I offered. Help is a two-way street.

I know you won't bother deleting my account, but I won't be here anymore. You remind me too much of the incoming "president," bullying people and taking choices away from them. If I felt safe here, I don't after reading this post of yours. I don't believe for one minutes that medical professionals (unless intimately associated with you) give a whit what happens here. You have banned the true sources of wisdom and allowed the petulant children to remain. I can only assume I haven't been banned because I'm still pre-op and therefore a potential customer of your store.
I hope know one sues you after they receive permission to eat pizza and drink beer in the recovery room and then rupture their sleeve, from the wonderful fount of knowledge that remains here.
You have permission to use nothing that you find in my profile or private messages.

Alex,
I am a big believer in private property, and you invested time/money/talent creating a working site such as this, I do considerate "private property" not public domain. So, I do respect your right to make editorial decisions.
That said phrases like "safe spaces" in the current political/cultural environment are now "trigger" words to me. (Ironic I'm using that verbiage). It does leave a very bad taste in my mouth.
One of the most endearing parts of this online community was the frank adult discussion on a wide variety of topics. That's probably what has brought me back here more often than I really should. As a whole, I have found the conversations to be of higher than average quality. It is always interesting getting the perspective of people worldwide, as well as those from NYC and major metropolitan areas and the handful of us in flyover country.
I have always had two reasons for actively taking part in this community...first was to try and give back and help others because I sure needed it early on. Second was the wealth of knowledge I would not have ever found on my own because I would not have known what to Google.
I'll keep an eye open, to see if this place is still worth my time. Frankly, I have enjoyed the tough love comments and while I am not looking for drama, I've never seen anything excessive. There are plenty of other boards which I have been part of that have more than their share of trolls, but this one has not been one to my way of thinking.
Since I am not privy to the PM's I have no idea of what is so bothersome, but I really have enjoyed the contributions of those who have been banned and that is why I am publically offering a sincere wish you would reconsider. But as I said this is your project and investment.

In my previous note, I wrote that some conspiracies such as you're describing as nauseating would not be a surprise. I've not been privy to backroom messages, but have no doubt that I've seen a few results in the forums.
I respect that BP is a business and that you want and intend to continue to run it as a business to realize financial growth and a livelihood. In the process you've provided a service that clearly, given the numbers, is in demand.
That said, it is insulting for you to say that you will not delete accounts and go on to say that your decisions are not about money. Advertising revenue depends on the number of subscribers/users/members. The greater the enrollment, the greater the income. That's all well and good. If it really weren't about money, I think you'd be happy to close accounts, as doing so wouldn't cost you anything.
I repeat: I have no problem with the business practice, but I do with subterfuge.