Arabesque

Today is the one year anniversary of my surgery. Woo hoo! 91kg & a BMI of 35.1 down to 51kg & a BMI of 19.7. I’ve been maintaining my weight for about two months now after dropping 9kg more than I was intending as I sorted out my maintenance plan. But I’m not complaining. 

i was fortunate before my weight loss & did not have the serious health issues of high blood pressure, diabetes, heart problems, sleep apnoea, etc. usually associated with obesity but I’m sure they were in my future.

Now I dash around & about, go up & down stairs, play with my young nieces & nephews & live my life without breathing heavily or tiring quickly. 

My hair is growing back. My BMs are 95% regular. My face doesn’t look as gaunt & lined as it did. I could do without the boney butt, ribs, knee, ankle & wrist pain but it’s small price. And I’ve decided my loose skin is like a badge of honour for my weight loss. 

I’m very much looking forward to the next part of my journey. 

I really thought we had put all the "you are so skinny, are you sick" comments behind us.

Apparently not.

My mom, MY MOM! came over today with the specific intention to tell me that she thinks I am too skinny and to stop losing weight.  I had dropped off some dessert a her place the other day and she said she had to come over to tell me that she is worried because she thinks that I am even skinnier than over the Xmas holidays.

First, I stopped losing weight 6+ months ago.

Second, I am actually 6 lbs heavier than I was over xmas (I had lost some weight after my PS, and have since gained it back), so I don't know what she is talking about.

Third, I look awesome.

🙄

6 Weeks Post Op!

My world is drastically different! I now walk 3 to 4 miles a day and I’m constantly getting up to move my body! .

I close my Apple Watch rings daily and about 4 to 6 days a week I double or triple them!

I have been released to have all foods. When I reintroduce some I need to start at 1 ounce to see how “Tiny Tummy” likes it!

I am not reintroducing sugars, coffee or junk! I did not pay close to $13,000 to fail! .

I went to get follow up bloodwork done this week and my numbers are all in the perfect range! .

This is my new world and I am happy it!

@DaisyChainOz, @Arabesque ... am totally thinking of both of you this very moment as I watch the final set of the Millman-Federer match at the AO... I am riveted and literally screaming at the TV...

It’s my eight month surgery anniversary. Whoo hoo!

It hasn’t been easy but then it could have been much, much more challenging. I’ve had stalls that lasted weeks & weeks. I’ve mysteriously developed some health issues (fingers crossed they don’t become serious) which I didn’t have before. I’ve forgotten what a regular bowel motion is, vomit bile & saliva about once a week (damn morning vitamin) & some days I gurgle like a blocked drain! My energy levels aren’t great & I often feel tired but I’m sooooo glad I made the decision to have the surgery. 

I feel way better about myself. I look way better than I did. 😜 My feet don’t ache. My hiccups and reflux are not as severe as they used to be (no more sore muscles after a hiccup attack). I don’t breathe heavily walking up a couple of flights of stairs. I’m the smallest in my family not the biggest (though I’m still the shortest - tee hee). 

There have been unexpected learnings & realisations that resonated. Like realising I am a small person but I ate like I was a large framed 6ft 2. Like realising my nieces & nephews didn’t see me as their fat aunt but just saw me as their Sissy; their favourite & bestest aunt who loved them to pieces. Like I can sip one drink for hours, not eat the cheeses, dips, charcuterie or fries & still have lots of fun when out with my friends. 

I ate bread (& a little sorbet). First since before my surgery 8months ago. It was at one of my favourite of all time restaurants in Melbourne. Freshly made, still steaming when opened & served with their own butter & nori salt. Just couldn’t resist. Didn’t eat the whole piece just two bites. Soooo good & no side effects. 

No effects from the sorbet either but it was a scrape of a teaspoon. 

I still have issues when eating out. Get very tight & can’t eat much - less than what I would at home. Thought I was going to throw up at one restaurant. Just loud gagging in the bathroom but that was embarrassing enough. I think it’s tension - worrying if I’ll find something on the menu to eat, if it will upset me, ...

I’m still losing weight which is a bit of a concern. I’m trying to eat more but struggle to eat larger servings and I feel like I’m grazing all day. 

I survived the Christmas overindulgence. Woo hoo. My sisters-in-law & I share the cooking duties & make our favourite things. This year we pledged not to over cater so we wouldn’t have lots of leftovers. 

Looked around the lunch table and saw the plates over full of beef, ham, vegetables, salads & potato bake. My plate was like an after pxt: a tiny piece of ham & roast beef (5cm square), a broccolini stalk & a slice of cucumber. 

Thankfully we had a couple of hours break until dessert for which I had contributed most options. This was my challenge. First time I’ve eaten anything sweet for 8 months. I was expecting massive abdominal discomfort, maybe dumping. I took a thin slice of my steamed marmalade pudding, a dash egg custard, a spoon of jelly and a small piece of my cheesecake with cream & mixed berries. (I refused to make pavlova this year.) I ate a teaspoon of each & gave the rest to my mother. Everyone had seconds & some of my  grown-up nephews had thirds (they’re 6’4” & 6’6” & very slim - so unfair). 

Most importantly I survived. No side effects except a little gurgling &  I was very windy after - lol! Didn’t feel like I was really missing out. Though I would have loved one of my sister-in-law’s rum balls - she more than quadruples the rum. 

Haven’t stepped on the scales but I’m not expecting to see any real change. 

I survived the Christmas overindulgence. Woo hoo. My sisters-in-law & I share the cooking duties & make our favourite things. This year we pledged not to over cater so we wouldn’t have lots of leftovers. 

Looked around the lunch table and saw the plates over full of beef, ham, vegetables, salads & potato bake. My plate was like an after pxt: a tiny piece of ham & roast beef (5cm square), a broccolini stalk & a slice of cucumber. 

Thankfully we had a couple of hours break until dessert for which I had contributed most options. This was my challenge. First time I’ve eaten anything sweet for 8 months. I was expecting massive abdominal discomfort, maybe dumping. I took a thin slice of my steamed marmalade pudding, a dash egg custard, a spoon of jelly and a small piece of my cheesecake with cream & mixed berries. (I refused to make pavlova this year.) I ate a teaspoon of each & gave the rest to my mother. Everyone had seconds & some of my  grown-up nephews had thirds (they’re 6’4” & 6’6” & very slim - so unfair). 

Most importantly I survived. No side effects except a little gurgling &  I was very windy after - lol! Didn’t feel like I was really missing out. Though I would have loved one of my sister-in-law’s rum balls - she more than quadruples the rum. 

Haven’t stepped on the scales but I’m not expecting to see any real change. 

Today I said I’m an XS or size 8 (Aust) at a clothing store. I never thought I’d say those words and say them with confidence. And when I commented a dress was too big on me I was told it was the smallest size. As was the belt I wanted. 
 

I tried on a slim fitting singlet dress yesterday & was shocked to realise the lumpy bits on the dress were my hip bones. I have an hour glass shape so I always had hips but never ones that stuck out on the front of my body! 

I’ve been a size 10 before - for about 5 minutes. While I am now confident about saying I’m an 8, clothes shopping is all still a bit freaky for me. It’s not that I’m focussed on the size on the label. I’m well aware the cut/line of the clothes and the designer’s style will dictate what size I need or if it will suit my body shape. The size is the starting point & it’s starting at an 8/XS/38 which is a big mind set change. It’s thinking a pair of pants will be too small & discovering they are almost too big. 

While I’m still coming to terms with my actual new body shape and size, I’m very happy to be in this new reality. 
 

This morning I had an abdominal ultra sound because apparently my cholesterol keeps rising.

I don’t get it. My cholesterol was always fine & now when I eat less of everything & have lost weight it starts to go up.

My intake of fats & oils has decreased (not that I was a big fried food person before anyway) & not just because I eat way less. Always cut the fat of meats, still don’t eat bacon, use spray olive oil instead of regular oil. Even the tub of butter in my fridge has been there since before May. Lol.

I just don’t get it? Is it because I don’t eat anywhere near the amount of vegetables I ate before? It surely can’t be because I eat a piece of cheese every day which I didn’t before? Are all my hormones screwed up? 
Sigh! 

This morning I had an abdominal ultra sound because apparently my cholesterol keeps rising.

I don’t get it. My cholesterol was always fine & now when I eat less of everything & have lost weight it starts to go up.

My intake of fats & oils has decreased (not that I was a big fried food person before anyway) & not just because I eat way less. Always cut the fat of meats, still don’t eat bacon, use spray olive oil instead of regular oil. Even the tub of butter in my fridge has been there since before May. Lol.

I just don’t get it? Is it because I don’t eat anywhere near the amount of vegetables I ate before? It surely can’t be because I eat a piece of cheese every day which I didn’t before? Are all my hormones screwed up? 
Sigh!