Goody222

Hello,

I totally understand. I never actually got to my ideal weight ( I was about 8 pound away). Now it is more like 28 pounds away.

No excuses, I know better. I am still amazed at how quickly I can STILL gain weight!

Not really looking forward to the doctors visit.

WE CAN DO THIS! We will get it together.

Thankfully, my friends and family have not gotten covid 19. It is so surreal how much all of our lives have changed in such a short period of time.

I hope that everyone is okay and finding healthy ways to deal with the stress. I noticed myself stress eating. I have not even reached my goal weight yet! Trying very hard to hold myself accountable and log all foods.

10 hours ago, Sheribear68 said:

Wow guys. These posts really resonate with me:

I gained 110 pounds when I was pregnant with my daughter (2nd child) and the abuse I took from their father still haunts me.
That’s the baby that changed my whole metabolism and all I got from him was quiet disappoint and criticism In the weight gain and subsequent PPD.
By the time she was 3, I found out that their father was having an active affair with one of my coworkers and that basically everything I had been struggling with had been used against me and that the 2 of them were plotting to try to get custody of the kids.
They were actually using my new-found Morbid Obesity as a weapon against me to “prove” that I didn’t have the self-control necessary to raise 2 kids under the age of 6 as a single mom.

I fought sooooo hard that year and in years after, trying to fix what was “broken” in me only to fail over and over and over again.
Thankfully I had enough of a career and enough self-esteem to survive that onslaught and make it through. Those were several tough years where I was reminded painfully over and over that I wasn’t good enough-or desireable enough, smart enough, or like able enough to be considered a “good” parent and I was reminded on a monthly basis that it was going to be a a WAR of 2 vs 1.

I somehow persevered and got those kids raised. I spent over 13 years single and afraid to even think about having a life of my own.

I survived breast cancer as a single working mom. At that point, my biggest fear was dying before I could finish raising those kids— aged 16 and 12 when I was diagnosed.
The kids dad stopped paying child support after our first year divorced and I was afraid to even take him to court bc I didn’t feel worthy enough to raise my kids as a MO single mom in her mid-30s.
When I think of the years lost due to my feelings of inferiority, it almost makes me sick.

I wasted almost 13 years of my life feeling like a sub-par human and thankfully my current husband saw me— the true me— underneath all of that baggage. He loved me— plus sized and all— in spite of me not loving myself.

It took that brave and kind man’s love to realize that I could be so much more than the reality that I was currently living.
With his love and respect and complete acceptance, I was able to start this journey that has led to where I am now.
Ironically, my ex is a mere shadow of the man he once was— he won’t call or reach out to his kids and I’ve heard that he and that woman live a very small and petty existence where neither of them are fulfilled or even remotely happy.

If I were a better person, I would feel pity for them, but I must honestly admit that I do derive some satisfaction from their misery.

At the end of the day though, my best revenge is to live my best life as happily as possible, and I plan on doing that every. Single. Day.

Wow, I have read part of the challenges that you have overcome before . Reading this post is very powerful. I am so proud of you! You are definitely inspirational. You deserve to be happy and I am very glad that you were able to meet the current husband and really focus on you!

3 hours ago, Gottajustdoit said:

During my 1-year check up my team did seem more concerned with how I felt about my current weight and condition vs. what their expectations were for me. My BMI was 24%, which my surgeon said was in the "normal" range so he just said keep up what I'm doing.

I forgot to mention to him my very bad hip pain that I've been experiencing for the last 4 months or so. The pain started in my right groin and then my left. My primary doctor doctor says it is arthritis of the hips and wants me to start physical therapy. I did a bit of research online and read a few instances where hip pain started after rapid weight loss due to the change in body mass positioning. Has anyone else experienced more or additional skeletal pain since weight loss? I was expecting less pain in my back, etc. since the surgery but am having more pain, including pain in my arm/shoulder/neck.

I have had problems with my groin right side. I was sleeping with a heating pad but when I went for my chiro 1 month follow up, it went away. I do lift weight , walk and jog so I may have thrown myself off.
Also my bariatric dr wants me to weigh 155 which has me just missing a normal BMI. They said they e concerned with maintaining my weight loss vs a certain BMI I really want to push for 145 -148. I knots BMI is just a number but I have not had a normal BMI for 20 plus years! In the end, I just need to maintain so I am going through this mental struggle. I figure first I will get to 155 and then just see how I feel. Also still intimidated by maintenance mode

50 minutes ago, gabybab said:

I'm sorry I have been absent for so long. Today is my 1 year anniversary and I'm so happy that I had this surgery, with no regrets. I haven't lost any weight in 3 months and think I have hit a plateau. Not gaining weight, just not losing. I've lost 97 pounds and am so grateful for that, even I dont lose one more pound.

I've had trouble with a upset stomach since shortly after surgery. I had an endoscopy and they said I had mild gastropathy, but nothing to really cause the symptoms.

I'm debating on having another surgery to complete the DS, but am going to give it another 6 months. I don't feel ready to make that decision yet.

I was walking after surgery and am not doing it anymore, plus I'm sneaking a few bad things, but certainly not what I eating before. Like today I ate a yogurt for Breakfast with pumpkin seeds and granola. lunch was 2 slices of cucumber and cauliflower with 1T ranch made from sour cream and a snack packet of cheese and nuts.

I'm in a much better space but still need to be vigilant each day.

I would like to say thank you to everyone here for your support. I would also like to thank @sillykitty she posted a reply to a person that solidified my decision to have the sleeve. I have it copied and read it now and then. ❤ here it is below.

I agree with you, from this and previous posts, you're not ready.
You are focused on what you will give up, instead of what you will gain.
No one can make you want your health, weight loss, mobiliy, etc., more than you want a pastry. Hopefully you will get there one day.

Surgery twin.... Glad you are doing so well. 97 pounds is a lot of weight. I am dealing with an upset stomach alit more than would like. Even with that so happy that we are a yea out from surgery vs. just starting the journey. Not quite at goal but it is clearly within reach.

sorry about the stall. Hopefully, it willl break on its own.

53 minutes ago, AZhiker said:

It's all very strange, isn't it? I used to be the biggest one at work and now I am the second smallest. I also feel both uncomfortable and excited when people make statements about my new size. I want to look around to see who they are talking about! What I am finding to be more awkward, however, is how heavy people relate to me now. Those who knew me before NEVER say anything and sometimes avoid me. Heavy people who did not know me before make the assumption that I cannot relate to them. When weight comes up, like during an exam, they act like I am an outsider to their condition, while in fact I probably understand it even better than they do, themselves.

I can tell you for sure and for certain, there is a mental condition that accompanies obesity. Shame, guilt, depression, low self esteem, blaming others, making excuses ("Obesity runs in my family," "I'm not as fat as THAT person," for example), and continually comparing one's size with others, becomes a lifestyle and a mindset. Just because we lose the weight, doesn't mean we automatically lose the mindset. That seems to take even more work than simply sticking to the post -op diet.

After one year, I feel like I am now just beginning to do the real work of weight loss, which is the head work. It's rather surreal feeling sometimes - like I landed on a different planet and have to learn to navigate the new world.

I added up all my macros for today. I haven't been counting calories lately, as I am eating as much as I can just to maintain. But the numbers were informative. Looks like I am packing in 1800-2000 calories a day, 70 gm of Protein and 60 gm of fiber. It seems like an insane amount of food - another surreal experience to get used to. Before surgery I could easily gain weight on 1200 - 1500 calories. Now I have to eat at least that much just to maintain, and hundreds more when I work out.

@Everythinganna, @froufrou @AZhikerI completely get it! Such a different word that we are adjusting to. My mindddd has not caught up. People are asking me if I am done losing weight. I want to look around cause in my mind, I am just focused on reaching my goal weight. Aa part of me is terrified about maintenance mode. Seems like I am always gaining or losing. I definitely need to start working on the head work.

11 minutes ago, Everythinganna said:

I know- It’s weird for me too. I went into White House Black market and the lady looked me up and down. She’s like “you are so tiny you’re probably an extra extra small. Let me get that in that size for you”. Then I was eating with somebody last week and I told them (they did not know I had had surgery) that I eat really small portions and I’d be open to sharing a plate. He was like “oh I can totally tell - look how tiny you are!” So weird! But I love it though. And I feel better now. I’m actually able to eat somewhat regularly. Six days and counting till my surgiversary!

Extra small at WHBM, when I can can fit a medium dress ( darn the girls), I am going to dance outside the store. Congrats,, great job. Enjoy the tiny comments

On 2/6/2020 at 11:05 AM, Sheribear68 said:

My surgiversary attire pre-workout

Going to Celebrate later today by working a 1-11 shift. 😩

You are so small! I remember you talking about your big thighs....what thighs. Way to go.

29 minutes ago, Recidivist said:

I'm meeting a professional contact in a coffee shop later today whom I have never seen in person. I was describing what I look like so he could recognize me, and I told him I was "slim." It sort of made my day, because I used to tell people to look for the "big boy." 🙂

You are slim! Congrats, that has to feel amazing.

Totally understand.

@FluffyChix, thank you. It was really great to dress up and feel good about it. I even showed my arms!

On 1/24/2020 at 8:41 AM, november11 said:

HI GUYS let me give you some visuals of my progress so far. I have been lurking on your page since you were 5 months out and I was 4 months pre...well im almost 10 weeks out .  

You look great! Congrats.

4 hours ago, Sheribear68 said:

Holy moly guys!

This day last year (Super Bowl Sunday) was my first day of all liquid diet

I can remember being cranky and feeling sorry for myself bc here I was on the biggest food event of the year without being able to eat anything!

This year, the food isn’t nearly as important to me. We’re not going to any parties, and I’ve got my usual food planned for the day.

What a journey this past year has been.

It is crazy how far we have all come! So proud of us. I was so nervous and hopeful this time last year. Almost at goal #1 . We ROCK

Annual party

37 minutes ago, danieocean said:

A bit late posting my one-year post-op pics. The left is at my highest weight of 299 and my current and lowest weight of 131lbs. All this hard work over the last year paid off. Looking at pictures it's crazy to see how high I allowed my weight to get. This year has FLOWN by and so many changes have happened. I bought my first home, went to Europe, split from my fiance, went from a size 24 to a size 6 and had emergency surgery to remove my gallbladder week before last and moved out of that home I worked so hard to buy. While it's been a wild ride, I'm happy. I'm grateful for all the positive and necessary changes that have happened in my life. In the beginning, I had no idea what losing all of this weight would entail...positive and negative. The good most definitely outweighs the bad. This journey is not for the faint of heart. Keep your chin up and a stiff upper lip and you'll make it through. Hugs and love!

You look great! You look extremely fit and I would never guess that you just lost so much weight. You look as if you have always been that size!

1 hour ago, Gottajustdoit said:

Wizardry! Somehow, during the last few weeks, I've eaten nearly a box of Girl Scouts Thin Mints and an array of fun-sized Halloween candy. After a 2-month stall, I lost 4.5 lbs. I was beating myself about the sweets and so thankful the scale showed mercy. I do need to get back on track with more Protein and Water, but am glad that the calories did not latch on. I can't explain it. Maybe there is just a delay effect going on. Darn this time of year!

Take the weight loss win. I have the same thing, sometimes, I think I am doing everything right and the scale does not budge. Then, I eat more and lose weight. Go figure. Happy for you

15 minutes ago, Gottajustdoit said:

Hi all---just wanted you all to know that I had a consultation with a surgeon on Monday to discuss a breast reduction. I'm at 160 lbs and feels as if this is my maintenance weight. Given my history of back and neck pain, and wanting to get a breast reduction years ago, I figured now was the time to start pursuing it. The surgeon told me that my insurance would cover it so I'm going to go ahead with it. During the consult, she asked me if I was thinking about getting the apron skin removed. She took some measurements and photos and will submit them to my insurance company to see if that could be covered too. I never thought insurance would cover it so I'll wait and see---if my Blue Cross Blue Shield plan will pay, then I'm going to seriously consider it. If I decide yes, then I have to decide if I want to have that done at the same time as my mammoplasty. To be honest, both surgeries sound very painful. The incisions are real cuts, not laproscopic cuts, so the recovery time will take at least 2 weeks and longer if I do the apron skin. The apron-skin removal is not the same as a tummy tuck...that would be on my dime, but could be done at the same time as my apron-skin removal. So much to consider, especially because I'm not thrilled about going into surgery again. Oh, and I'd have to wait until my one-year surgerversary for the apron-skin surgery, which is fine with me given I want to make sure all the weight I think I've lost will be lost. Just to let you know....apron-skin removal might be covered by your insurance if the skin hangs below your pubic bone (that was why she measured me and took so many photos--ugh!). Anyone else considering one or both of these surgeries?

I am totally considering both! I am hoping my insurance would cover the breast reduction but concerned if my breasts are no longer so big...what hides my stomach! Hence, considering both. Please keep us updated.

On 10/6/2019 at 9:40 AM, Sheribear68 said:

Okay guys so today is my 8 month surgiversary.

My GW is 155, and true to form (me being more of the tortoise than the hare)
I’ve fallen 1 pound SHORT of goal for this date.

Am I gonna let it stop me or discourage me?
Nope! In fact I’m doubling down this week bc my bday is in 10 days and maybe I can at least hit my goal by my secondary GW date.

Never give up!

I am sure you will do it!congrats! 1 pound from goal is amazing

@sherribear, I left out you get five extra fashion point cause your phone matches your dress!

@sherribear... way to step up your fashion game! I love that dress and the boots and tights go very well. You have come along way. I remember reading your post complaining about big thighs. What thighs? You look great. Also, if you fit into a medium....nothing is big.

Tell you what...let’s see if we can get a group discount on skin removal.

@viking that is a transformation. You hAve to be so proud of yourself.

2 hours ago, gabybab said:

I love your dress and those shoes are amazing.

I'm doing ok. I'm going to be having an EGD because I have an off and on again stomach pain/upset since surgery. I haven't got the date yet until they get the approval. I will let you know what I find out.

I'm at 251 and have lost 87 pounds. I feel like I should have lost more, but probably am waiting too much. Last night I ate a whole croissant with no ill feeling. If eat chicken it hurts after a few bites. I try to stick to soft Proteins. Yogurt is the easiest on my stomach. I still have tons of restriction, but am finding I can graze a bit. I'm still trying to be very mindful of what I eat.

I am at a BMI of 39.9 which is just below morbid obesity. I still have a long way to go. I really hope it get there by 18 months. My dr and I will go over my options at 12 months to see if i need/want a revision to DS. I'm having so much lose skin and would consider doing my arms. I carry my weight in my upper half of my body and have way smaller legs. I guess we all have our problem areas. Mine is my arms, breasts and stomach.

You're looking good! How much do you have to lose to goal? I'm at a spot that most people started. But, overall I feel pretty amazing! Take care! Stay in touch. 💗

We really are surgery twins we have the same surgery date and the same starting weight! I hope the EGD helps. It really is difficult when you are unable to eat . By this time you just want to feel normal.

i feel you on the loose skin, I try to suck in my stomach most of the time but doggone it, I have to breathe. I still have about 40 to 45 pounds to lose. I am hoping my stomach goes away with those 45 pounds.

Lets take a moment acknowledge the fact that you lost 87 pounds! That is amazing, I looked at some of my original post and I wrote something like if I lose 90 pounds in six months, I will be dancing down the street! Here we are. Did you think you would ever be able to say, I lost 87 pounds in seven months or so? I

2 hours ago, VIKING 0424 said:

thats all we can do is try and our success brings us great joy for all and our failures make us that much stronger for the next success

That is so true

13 hours ago, sjemle said:

Ugh.. so was really happy last week. I can visually see a huge difference, but feel frustrated this week. So I am back at the gym after gallbladder surgery and today I am up 5 lbs from last week. I haven't changed anything except working out, and I have only gone twice this week. Just needed to vent. I am posting my before and current pictures because I still have a ways to go, but need to remind myself how far I have come!

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You do look good. Take a minute to Celebrate how good you look and how far you have come