mary1966

Tina, my heart goes out to you. I have a similar story, but the girlfriend was of FOUR years and there were others to boot. This crap went down 5-6 years ago, and when I found out, I had an affair out of revenge (I know it was wrong). We ended up in many months of counseling only to find out our marriage of 16 years at that time, had really been quite an emotional disaster. The good news is, we decided to put all of the cards on the table and got into the psychology of why affairs happen. Most men are afraid of strong women (no offense, guys). Your weight loss is a threat. Your attention to yourself takes attention away from him. Men love to be the Knight in Shining Armour, but you have been your own Knight with the decision you have made to change your life. SO, at my psych eval, all of this came out, and the counselor asked me if my husband was threatened by what I am about to do (May 23rd). He says no, but I KNOW he is. He already thinks I will leave when our daughter graduates in 2 years from high school, and to be honest, I have not yet made that decision but I am leaning toward staying right now. Our marriage is better than it ever was, but I do not NEED him anymore and he knows it. If it does not work out, I will be fine - but it took a very long time for me to come to that conclusion on my own. I stayed because of my kids, and the marriage is better than ever. I am stronger now and have a thick skin where he is concerned. I see you live in DC and I am in Richmond, VA. Maybe we could meet half way for lunch sometime. Part of what I now do in life is try to help other women make their way through crap like this and unlock their true potential...you have such a bright future and you look fantastic. Never let anyone torture you like this because no one is worth sacrificing yourself for. Live for YOU and your KIDS. If you want to give it a try, it can work, but it is now all about what you really want and what he really wants. Find out the real reason he had the affair. What was he looking for that he PERCEIVED was missing from home? Mine said he was her Knight in Shining Armour and she was not judgmental of him. Funny - when I met him he was MY Knight, but not anymore. I am my own Knight, and you will be yours. If you want to give me a call, e-mail and I will give you my number. Stay strong for yourself and your kids.

Tina, my heart goes out to you. I have a similar story, but the girlfriend was of FOUR years and there were others to boot. This crap went down 5-6 years ago, and when I found out, I had an affair out of revenge (I know it was wrong). We ended up in many months of counseling only to find out our marriage of 16 years at that time, had really been quite an emotional disaster. The good news is, we decided to put all of the cards on the table and got into the psychology of why affairs happen. Most men are afraid of strong women (no offense, guys). Your weight loss is a threat. Your attention to yourself takes attention away from him. Men love to be the Knight in Shining Armour, but you have been your own Knight with the decision you have made to change your life. SO, at my psych eval, all of this came out, and the counselor asked me if my husband was threatened by what I am about to do (May 23rd). He says no, but I KNOW he is. He already thinks I will leave when our daughter graduates in 2 years from high school, and to be honest, I have not yet made that decision but I am leaning toward staying right now. Our marriage is better than it ever was, but I do not NEED him anymore and he knows it. If it does not work out, I will be fine - but it took a very long time for me to come to that conclusion on my own. I stayed because of my kids, and the marriage is better than ever. I am stronger now and have a thick skin where he is concerned. I see you live in DC and I am in Richmond, VA. Maybe we could meet half way for lunch sometime. Part of what I now do in life is try to help other women make their way through crap like this and unlock their true potential...you have such a bright future and you look fantastic. Never let anyone torture you like this because no one is worth sacrificing yourself for. Live for YOU and your KIDS. If you want to give it a try, it can work, but it is now all about what you really want and what he really wants. Find out the real reason he had the affair. What was he looking for that he PERCEIVED was missing from home? Mine said he was her Knight in Shining Armour and she was not judgmental of him. Funny - when I met him he was MY Knight, but not anymore. I am my own Knight, and you will be yours. If you want to give me a call, e-mail and I will give you my number. Stay strong for yourself and your kids.

Tina, my heart goes out to you. I have a similar story, but the girlfriend was of FOUR years and there were others to boot. This crap went down 5-6 years ago, and when I found out, I had an affair out of revenge (I know it was wrong). We ended up in many months of counseling only to find out our marriage of 16 years at that time, had really been quite an emotional disaster. The good news is, we decided to put all of the cards on the table and got into the psychology of why affairs happen. Most men are afraid of strong women (no offense, guys). Your weight loss is a threat. Your attention to yourself takes attention away from him. Men love to be the Knight in Shining Armour, but you have been your own Knight with the decision you have made to change your life. SO, at my psych eval, all of this came out, and the counselor asked me if my husband was threatened by what I am about to do (May 23rd). He says no, but I KNOW he is. He already thinks I will leave when our daughter graduates in 2 years from high school, and to be honest, I have not yet made that decision but I am leaning toward staying right now. Our marriage is better than it ever was, but I do not NEED him anymore and he knows it. If it does not work out, I will be fine - but it took a very long time for me to come to that conclusion on my own. I stayed because of my kids, and the marriage is better than ever. I am stronger now and have a thick skin where he is concerned. I see you live in DC and I am in Richmond, VA. Maybe we could meet half way for lunch sometime. Part of what I now do in life is try to help other women make their way through crap like this and unlock their true potential...you have such a bright future and you look fantastic. Never let anyone torture you like this because no one is worth sacrificing yourself for. Live for YOU and your KIDS. If you want to give it a try, it can work, but it is now all about what you really want and what he really wants. Find out the real reason he had the affair. What was he looking for that he PERCEIVED was missing from home? Mine said he was her Knight in Shining Armour and she was not judgmental of him. Funny - when I met him he was MY Knight, but not anymore. I am my own Knight, and you will be yours. If you want to give me a call, e-mail and I will give you my number. Stay strong for yourself and your kids.