Neversaynever

And I have another problem, I want my Bariatric surgery so bad, I'm starting to sound,like a plastic surgery junkie,you know them, they repeatedly,have surgeries trying to look and have the shape of Barbie Doll.,While Cloudburst is drinking enough tea to float,downstream and Nicoleea is reading " The fall and Decline of the Western World" as she walks, I'm on the floor, having a tantrum and shouting,"Slash me,,Please Please Slash Me!" Guess it all depends on your viewpoint, doesn't it?😞

This was one of my hugest fears, and since I liked the way I look big, as did my husband it made the fear worse. Plenty of good men like a big women but who has a loose skin fetish?
At the end of the day I have two small kids that need their mommy, so I had to throw my aesthetic concerns out.
My advice, think about why you are having surgery. If it is for merely aesthetics, maybe it is not the best choice for you. If it is for your health and longevity then you have your answer. All best.

So what if I end up looking like a Shar Pei? People want them, keep it with them , pay top dollar for,a specimen and even enter them in "top of the line" dog shows. I,might even be able to,stand being called 🐶Precious,for frequent small feedings of expensive treats and foods. 😜

Ugh. So I just had my last pre op appointment. I’m cleared for VSG in 5/21. But now I’m freaking out a little.

So I’m a 40 yo guy 5’11. HW 287 CW 268. That’s all from my 1 month pre op diet. I’ve kept my daily calories to 900-1000 with at least 120g Protein. About half shakes and half food. It’s been hard but I’ve gotten used to it. But the thought of “when I’ll be able to eat real food” is always there. Fat Brain? Food addiction? Addiction runs in my family in both sides.

So I’ve lost 20 pounds, managed my work schedule, went through all the insurance hoops, paid out 5600 in program fees and copays/deductibles. My wife is very supportive. I’m on 3 blood pressure meds, have sleep apnea, high cholesterol. My father had a stroke at 55. My chest CT showed starting coronary artery disease. My weight is really effecting my health.

I hate how I look. I wear vests or sweaters over my dress shirts because I hate how my gut makes my shirts untuck and look sloppy.

I have 4 sweet children. The love how I cook and always say we should open a restaurant called “Big Fat Daddies”. They are being sweet but I hate being seen as Big Fat Daddy.

My weight had always been a issue but until the last 7-8 years I’ve kept it somewhat in check. I stayed right at the top of my “height weight” band in the Navy and passed all my physical fitness tests as a firefighter and paramedic. But over the last 8 years things have gotten out of control.

But now that this is real and Surgery is Mon morning I’m having second thoughts. Maybe I can stay on my “pre op” plan for another 60-80 pounds. Maybe I can keep it off this time. Of course as soon as I left my surgeon I went out for lunch and had a Mac and cheese and a cupcake for desert. I’m nauseous and ashamed of my weakness. But I’m afraid of parting ways with the lifestyle of indulgence that I enjoy despite how sick it’s making me and limiting my ability to enjoy life.

I’m sorry this really is an emotional dump. I’m just really filled with conflicting emotions.

Oh sweetie!! I am so sorry!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

You can do this, it WILL get better, you are struggling and this is so hard, you are probably being a hero at every moment because you have to handle your health issues and keep your life afloat. I know how hard that is.

Are you taking Prilosec twice a day? I had horrible acid reflux and my doc had me take one in the AM and one in the PM. I still do for periods of time and I'm 15 months out.

I want you to know it took me 12 weeks to get to the pureed stage. I just took longer to heal as I had a lot going on, i had my gallbladder removed, a massive hiatal hernia repair and the VGS. I wasn't back on my feet in full swing for MONTHS. And I'd read here where people are like "Wow, surgery yesterday, back to work today, feeling great!" and I was SOOO jealous. I also had a LOT of regret. I was a reluctant Sleever, I had a lot of major medical issues and was very close to dying so this was my choice - Sleeve or Die. That's what my doctor actually said to me. But my post surgery complications were difficult and my emotions were at their lowest. It is SOOO hard.

Have you tried the Unjury chicken broth Protein Soup? I was like you and nothing stayed down well and I was in a lot of pain. The Unjury CHicken Broth soup saved me. Sure, I was loading up on Sodium but I didn't care at that point. Maybe it will work for you?

Also, I was unable to drink anything but Water till 14 months out. I also could only eat really soft chicken for the first 12 months. Even now I just mostly eat chicken or pork, I can't eat beef, I can't eat veggies, I can't eat sugars as I get a dumping syndrome. But I am SOOO happy now and I feel amazing. Here is a post I made a few months ago for a young girl who was scared to have the surgery. On it I list the things I used to keep me motivate. Maybe it will help you??
I am so sorry, I am sending you a Word Hug. You got this, even if you think you can't.
This is my previous post:

I actually have a fear of missing out on eating huge meals. Even though I know this is going to be great for me in almost every way for some reason I am feeling a bit of trepidation about not being able to eat a 20oz steak and a baked potato in one sitting or taking full advantage of an all you can eat buffet. I guess there is something satisfying about eating that enormous meal I fear I will miss out on. Thanks for sharing, this is the first time I have expressed that concern.

If you are constantly getting some type of Protein in, and Fiber as well, you should not experience hunger. I made sure that every 2 hours or so, I was eating or drinking something. I never got hungry. Before cooking meals, I had a Protein Shake. I then would not be hungry when dinner or Breakfast (on weekends) was ready.
I did a 2 week liquid diet even though I only had to do 1 week. I lost 25 pounds during this time, because I was determined to make it work. My advice would be to get your mind right. This is for you, and there is a light at the end of the tunnel. You've just got to look for it. We've tried and failed at every diet we've ever tried our entire lives. This tool is worth the trouble and hardships, because it tips the balance in our favor.
It may sound crazy, but self-talk works wonders. Everyday, wake up and look into the mirror. Tell yourself that you are beautiful...That you will work hard to achieve your goals that day.....That you are worth happiness.....That you are going to SUCCEED!
It will happen for you. Good luck on your journey!!

I have been eating too much of course! I went to see him and he has now put me on the waiting list and says I have been granted funding. They aim to do the surgery within 18 weeks he said but he also thinks it will be a lot sooner. I went to see the dietician again and she showed me the pre op diet. I think I might be able to do it but it will take a lot of will power!

How did you do on the preop?

Good luck to all of you. You will feel so great about yourselves. Sometimes I will eat something that I loved before my RNY 11 yrs ago. Now some foods don't agree with me. I could give up meat easily however thank God I love veggies. You all will be proud and you will feel good about yourselves I am elated for all of you. It is the best thing I have ever done for myself!!!!!!

A smile speaks a thousand words.

Thanks,
I went for my appointment and they were lovely. they were impressed that i had lost another kilo since my last appointment and said they would now pass me to the surgical team for them to decide which surgery to offer me. Fingers crossed they will be in touch soon!

The trick is this - honesty.

Unless you are hiding deep seated psychotic fears over weight and manic tendencies then it's not a massive issue.

They are there to help you, not trip you up by denying your chance to get healthy.

As for depression over obesity, most people are as that's where bad habits come in. Your job is to say what you feel but also how you tackle it, what your support network helps with.

It's easier on the day, just be honest [emoji4]