Hiraeth

I can understand asking about the charge, I question anything on a receipt when I don't know what it is. Where I live a lot of place have a plate share charge on their menu. I always buy a meal and take home the leftovers.

I have the right to complain about a BUSINESS. You obviously have a lot of pent up anger. There's medicine for that.

Those are horrible experiences. But those things have absolutely nothing to do with my post. Once again, your argument is irrelevant. Move along.

Thank you everyone for your input, even the ones to disagreed with me. You all responded in a very decent manner and I truly appreciate that. I do not expect to be treated differently because I had WLS. That would be absurd. I just would like to be treated politely. Had they told me beforehand, or even afterwards, in a polite manner, I never would have gotten frustrated. If I am wrong about something, I am very quick to admit fault. So, I admit, I misunderstood the policy. I can somewhat understand why it's there. But it would have been nice to at least been told this, instead of being rude. Something along the lines of, "I'm sorry there was a misunderstanding, if you'll look here at our menu, it says that there is a split fee charge. I hope this is ok. I'm sorry you had a poor experience, we will keep your comments in mind to serve others better in the future." I mean, how can anyone be mad at a response like that? I would have been so grateful for that response, or even something close to it.

LMAO! Me too! I was thinking to myself, "Is Ronald Reagan back there splitting burgers?"
You are 100% correct. I would have gladly paid the $3 charge, had it been explained to me politely. There was no need for rudeness. Had he said that, and asked me if I would like it removed from the bill, I would have said, "No thank you. I appreciate your polite explanation. I'm sorry for misunderstanding."
Thanks for your reply. <3

Not true. I am not acting out of character. I complained because, to me, I felt that they were charging us for splitting it. They did not make an effort to tell us politely. Wouldn't you complain if you felt like you were charged a fee that didn't belong? Just because you've heard of split fees, doesn't mean everyone else has. It would have been nice if they had told us beforehand.

@@OutsideMatchInside,

I did not expect special treatment. I just expect to be treated respectfully. I did not cuss or scream at him, yet he was still rude. If he would have said, "I apologize for the misunderstanding. On the menu it says there's a split fee charge. I hope that is ok.", then I would have understood and left it at that. But I didn't get anything close to that.

No one explained that to us. The assistant manager didn't even apologize for the misunderstanding. He was extremely rude.

I have eaten at much nicer restaurants than that place, and I have never been charged a split fee. Not even at 5 star restaurants. What's so hard about apologizing for the misunderstanding? Do you see that I'm not purely upset about the charge, but more so about how it was handled? They were so rude to me and my mother.

@@Hiraeth Well, to be fair, Ex#1 made a bit of a scene when he VERY loudly announced to the owner that she could HAVE her F*ING table, and then when the poor lady at the front said "have a nice evening" on our way out, he turned around and shouted in front of the line of people waiting for tables that we would never come back to that place again. But that was well after the owner had made a butt of herself. LOL.

Regardless of whether or not the restaurant was right in charging the fee (they have the right), the way the management handled the situation was outright rude and not good customer service. Anyone who owns a business and wants repeat customers would have handled the situation apologetically and with some grace, even if they stuck to their guns.
There literally would have been no harm in the manager apologizing about the misunderstanding and even offering to take the $3 off. That would have probably ensured that the OP would have returned with a good feeling, repeat business.
Now, because the management was so stringent on $3, the OP will not return and also let lots of people know. BAD judgment on the management's part.

In the days before online reviews, I had the absolute WORST experience at a restaurant in Ft. Worth. It was an Italian place with singing waiters and booths with swinging doors (the teens LOVED the place because you could make out with your date... LOL). Anyway, Ex#1 and I went there on Valentine's weekend. We knew it would be crazy, but we wanted a nice dinner before our concert that evening. We waited a long time for a table, but not out of line with it being V-day weekend. We placed our order, and waited. And waited. And waited. Our drinks/water were not refilled, it had been 45 minutes since we placed our order and nothing had come out. I flagged down our waitress, and asked how much longer, keeping in mind we had concert tickets and while we'd left what we thought was plenty of time for V-day delays, it was getting late. She came back and said the kitchen was starting on our meal next. I was surprised that we'd been there almost an hour and our meal had not even been *started*, and said so. I wasn't rude, didn't ask to speak to the manager, nothing. Just surprised.
The next thing I know, the owner is at our table, wanting to know what the problem was. I said there wasn't really a problem, I wasn't lodging a complaint, I was just surprised that we'd been there over an hour and no one had even started cooking our order yet. She leaned in over my shoulder, started shaking her finger in my face, yelling at me that we had NOT been there an hour, she'd checked the time, it had only been FIFTY minutes. And that she had a line out the door waiting for tables, and we should feel lucky that we had a table. Ex#1 informed her that she could HAVE the table, in that case. She called the waitress over and very loudly told the waitress to make sure we were charged for our drinks (sodas, btw, we hadn't had any alcohol).
I was floored. I'd never been treated like that in a restaurant before. Until she got literally in my face shouting and shaking her finger in my face, neither I nor Ex#1 had gotten upset or raised our voices, or even said we had a complaint. But as I said, this was before Yelp and Google reviews, so I didn't think I had any recourse.
At the time, I was an administrative assistant in the executive offices of a large hospital chain in Ft. Worth. We started doing one of those "paradigm shift" quality initiative programs where every employee (several thousand) was required to attend. As part of the exec team, I was in the first group to go. We were asked to share customer service experiences, and I shared mine. The team leaders were so horrified by that customer service experience, that it was repeated to EVERY group that went through the program with my hospital, and very likely with other corporations as well. And named the restaurant by name.
It was closed by the end of the year. I don't know that I had anything to do with it, but I don't know that I didn't.
You never know when your story will make an impact that will change a business.
I always let management know when I have a bad experience, because I want them to have an opportunity to fix the problem. I also make sure they know when I have exceptionally good service, because I know they get more complaints than attaboys. (Freaks the servers out too when you ask to see a manager, and they can't figure out what they've done wrong... )
I agree that the split fee itself is not that big of a deal. But if I'd gotten that response from the manager, I'd have posted a complaint as well. And to have the owner come back with an attack instead of a reasoned response tells me that the owner has no business in the restaurant industry. Customer feedback, even when it's not an attaboy, is an opportunity to improve your business. Treating it as an attack has no place in a customer service industry. It would have been different if the OP had been antagonistic or upset with the manager or server to start with, which it doesn't sound like she was. Even if a manager doesn't have a duty to de-escalate, they certainly have a duty not to escalate a situation, which he clearly did here.

I have eaten at much nicer restaurants than that place, and I have never been charged a split fee. Not even at 5 star restaurants. What's so hard about apologizing for the misunderstanding? Do you see that I'm not purely upset about the charge, but more so about how it was handled? They were so rude to me and my mother.

This is the review I left on the restaurant's Facebook.< br />
"My mom and I just ate here for lunch today, and we are not pleased. Since Bistro V's food is expensive, we decided to just split a cheeseburger. When they brought out our food, they split our burger for us. We thought that was so kind of them, and were happy with that. The burger (which was listed as $9) was pretty good, but it wasn't much different than a Five Guy's burger. We chose to eat there because we like the bread they bring out, and the atmosphere is pleasant. When we got our ticket, I noticed that the bill was over $17. So, I looked at everything and noticed that they charged us a $3 split fee! Seriously?! So we notified the waitress, who said that it was automatically put on the ticket. We said we could have just split it ourselves, and that we are not paying a split fee. She got the manager (if that's what you want to call him), and he immediately had a snobby demeanor (that could just be his personality; it probably wasn't directed towards us). He said, "Y'all have a complaint?" I told him that it wasn't necessarily a complaint, but that I just don't understand why I have to pay a split fee when we could have just split the burger ourselves. He said, "Well, when two people are seated at a table, and only order one meal, there's automatically a split charge." So, I said, "That's ridiculous. We could have just split it ourselves. Also, what if someone didn't want to eat?" So then he hesitates and says, "Well, we gave you more food." (Which is a complete lie. I've ordered the cheeseburger before, and it was exactly the same size and came with the exact same amount of fries as the last time I ordered it.) They never told us beforehand that there would be a split charge. We didn't even ask them to split it for us; we just said we were going to split it. He did not apologize and he did NOT remove the fee. He made absolutely no effort to show that he is a pleasant or professional person. He took our payment and walked off. When he came back, he said, "Have a good day..." in a snarky tone. (Again, that's probably just how he acts in general.) We will not be back. It's not the fact that it was $3; it's the fact that no one should be charged a split fee, regardless, especially when the restaurant doesn't have the decency to notify the customer before the order goes through. I left my Yelp review and noticed that someone else complained about the split fee. They said that there's a split fee notification on the menu. But even still, how would anyone know to look for something like that? I've never been to a restaurant that has a split fee. It's like they were being sneaky about it; like some kind of fine print scam. It's like you can't come in and sit down in peace without looking at the menu to make sure there's not a "breathing the air" fee. I shouldn't have given a single tip, but the waitress was friendly, and it wasn't her fault for what happened. So, I left a tip, anyway."

They proceeded to leave snarky replies in response. So I emailed the owner in a very professional manner. She emailed me back saying, "Yelp about it". I was shocked. I could not believe that they were refusing to handle this situation like professionals. Not only that, but the owner's friends got on my review and began insulting me personally. The owner's mother-in-law even got on there and said things along the lines of, "People of certain class know that high end restaurants charge split fees. Since when does someone go to a high end restaurant and buy only one meal?" So I said, "I recently had stomach surgery. Why would I buy a meal that I cannot finish, when I can just split it with someone?" Then, a few minutes later, the owner emailed me back and said, "We will not tolerate abuse from our customers." Since when is a complaint abuse? They claim that I insulted their employee by saying he's snarky. Well he was! Wouldn't it have been easier to just say, "I apologize for the misunderstanding."? How hard is that? When they responded to me the way they did by saying "they won't tolerate", that makes me wonder if they will try to sue me for defamation. I did my research and found that the only way they can is if I make false claims. Not a single statement was false. I'm so livid and shocked by the complete disregard for my situation.

Some of my friends got on the review and began cussing the owner's friends out, because they were insulting me. I publicly tried to contain the situation by telling them to not cuss or call names. Not once did the owner publicly try to contain her Facebook friends. Not once did I receive an apology. She even tried saying that I could have my $3 refunded to me. Why would I drive 15 minutes to get $3? Why couldn't they have just given me the refund while I was at the restaurant? I told them I didn't want the refund of $3. I said that they could just give it to my waitress, because she was actually friendly; and that if she declined, then they could donate the money to the charity of their choice.

I know that now. But I still did not deserve to be treated so rudely.

That's exactly what I did. I kept my composure, while still voicing my concern and confusion. And you're right. I should have posted that I was angry about the treatment. Thanks so much for your very thorough input, LittleBill! You never disappoint! I was like, "Ok, when is LittleBill going to comment?" *taps foots*
I love this! So glad it ended well for you! And both parties won!

@@Hiraeth Or infamous. Notorious, even.

Split fees are relatively common where I live, which is why I now know to scan the menu to see if it's listed before deciding on the order. I've seen the charge fee on menus at casual, medium-cost places as well as high-end ones. I wouldn't split a meal at a truly fine-dining restaurant, but from the description of the bistro it was pleasant but not swanky. I would split a sandwich there, or bring half of my meal home for later. I often will split meals with my mom at such places, not out of cheapness but practicality. She has a very limited diet due to health issues causing restrictions, and for her a plain baked potato constitutes a whole meal rather than a side. What we'll typically do is order the meal we're sharing plus something small - a side dish, or a salad, so that at least we are both ordering something. We also give a tip like we've both ordered two full meals so the server is fully compensated for serving both of us.
It sounds like the bistro really needs to learn some social graces. It's smarter for a business to resolve a matter that is small and fixable, such as a $3 split fee that can be removed (they could have even said something along the lines of "in the future, please be aware this is our policy"), than to consume time and energy bickering on social media and receiving a negative review.

Those are horrible experiences. But those things have absolutely nothing to do with my post. Once again, your argument is irrelevant. Move along.

Hahaha! So glad I made you laugh. You're definitely famous on this site!

No offense against your aunt, but I bet she is just insecure. She probably is afraid of you succeeding, because she's afraid of the surgery, and she probably hates the idea of you looking better than her. Weight loss surgery is so much better than suppressants. Your aunt is basically taking medical speed. When/if she stops taking it, she will most likely regain her weight. She will have to work her ass off to not fall back into old habits.

I have a co-worker like this. She resents me for some reason. When I told her I was having this surgery, she said so many things to discourage me. She would argue with me daily on why this surgery was a bad idea. She would tell me that I would fail because there's a reason I'm fat. She said, "You can lose weight on your own. There's no reason to get this surgery. You like to eat, so how do you know this surgery will work? I know of many people who failed with this surgery. I even know of people who have died."
Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't it seem like she wants me to fail? I mean, she would raise her voice at me and talk bad about me on the phone to her family! Over a surgical procedure! I was shocked! And guess what? She's overweight; even more so than I ever was. I think she's about 350 pounds. She's been to a weight loss clinic 4 times in the last 2 years, and she hasn't succeeded at all. She can't stick with it for more than a week. I've realized that she's just very insecure. I've lost 60 pounds since August, and not once has she complimented me about my VERY OBVIOUS weight loss.

So, you do what you think is best. Get the surgery and worry about yourself. When you prove your aunt wrong, watch closely and see if she compliments you. If she doesn't, then you know why.

Also, this surgery is not a miracle. It is a tool. It helps you lose weight and makes it easier. It does not do it for you. It allows you to change bad habits into good ones. You will still have to go to the gym and eat correctly.

That's exactly what I did. I kept my composure, while still voicing my concern and confusion. And you're right. I should have posted that I was angry about the treatment. Thanks so much for your very thorough input, LittleBill! You never disappoint! I was like, "Ok, when is LittleBill going to comment?" *taps foots*
I love this! So glad it ended well for you! And both parties won!

@@Hiraeth I laughed out loud about the *taps foot* comment. For many years in my business, I have told people, "I may be slow, but I'm reliable." Thank you for your kind words.

That's exactly what I did. I kept my composure, while still voicing my concern and confusion. And you're right. I should have posted that I was angry about the treatment. Thanks so much for your very thorough input, LittleBill! You never disappoint! I was like, "Ok, when is LittleBill going to comment?" *taps foots*
I love this! So glad it ended well for you! And both parties won!

I can appreciate your irritation, although...a $7 burger isn't really a fancy place to eat. If your total bill for a burger, presumably two non-alcoholic drinks, and a $3 split fee was $17, I feel like they're holding themselves a bit high as a "nice" establishment. Given the way you were treated, I tend to think their behavior supports the point that they aren't the fine dining they seem to consider themselves to be.
That being said, I haven't ever been charged a split fee because I don't really split things. I eat what I want to, then take it home or let someone else at my table eat it. Margins on actual fine dining are slim, and you aren't being charged a $3 fee to actually cut the burger, just like a corkage fee has nothing to do with the manual act of removing a cork, but rather the right to split a meal or to bring your own bottle of wine, when to do so without any minor fee is really not customary practice. It certainly would have been nice though if they had put somewhere on the menu that the fee existed. At a nice place, I can see economically the purpose of a split fee and most people paying to eat at a nice place, first don't care about the $3 and probably don't notice it on their bill, and second at an actual nice place, there would not have been any attitude from a manager, the fee would have been removed. The difference in my experience between a classy place to eat and a place that likes to think its classy is that there is an understanding that you sometimes lose a few dollars, but you make up for it in customer loyalty. A truly nice establishment handles the customer in a way that leaves them feeling happy...sure they complain about you when you leave and they roll their eyes when you aren't looking, but they are never, ever rude to your face or in front of any other customer. They certainly don't have their family members replying to your Yelp comments- that would make them look incredibly stupid and any person who was accustomed to eating in nice places would absolutely avoid going somewhere that responded that way on social media if only because it clearly demonstrates a total lack of class.
So...sure, a split fee is normal sometimes, and I understand that you were surprised by it, but I find the behavior of the business to be unacceptable if they are going to cast themselves as being a better than average place to dine. I wouldn't go there after seeing that exchange on social media because it reeks of a scene- something that you will rarely if ever see in a nice place, and certainly not in a way that is exacerbated by management. I'm sorry you were treated poorly, but if it makes you feel better, places like that rarely last very long for all of the reasons I've mentioned above. They will be sad soon enough, lol.