relief57

Here is my list:
1. I'm a stress eater with a child with special medical needs (rare bleeding disorder)
2. I had thyroid issues in my teens and that started my weight gain, this resolved with pregnancy, but the weight remained.
3. I did too many yoyo diets, and wanted to be Barbie when I was in high school, with thyroid issues that never works.
4. I have an autoimmune disease that causes soft tissue damage, I have had 2 knee replacements, 3 (getting ready for #4) rotator cuff repairs. And can't workout without doing major damage to my joints.
5. I spent 17 years living in Chicago, and the cold weather caused me so much pain I was a hermit for 7 months a year, just packing on the pounds.
6. I was raped when I was 16 by my former step father, and didn't tell anyone until I was in my 20's. I think I ate to silence the scared hurt little girl that was inside my head. food didn't keep me safe, but my mom always equaled food to love, that's why under my user name it says "Food in NOT love". I learned with counseling that feeding people, and overeating myself didn't fill the void in my life, or make me feel any more loved. That was a HUGE step for me.
7. Genetics just about everyone in my family is obese. My grandfather was over 400 pounds, my mom is the oldest of 10 kids, all but 3 are morbidly obese, and those 3 are still overweight, one has a lap band and is getting healthy, the rest seem happy just the way they are.
*I was just diagnosed with the auto immune disorder, in the past my pain, joint damage and soft tissue injuries were ALWAYS blamed on my weight. When I lost the weight and still had issues my new doctor started looking for answers. She said weight doesn't cause rotator cuff tears, and that I shouldn't have been dismissed because of my weight. I started seeing a new doctor when my previous md was not on board with my being revised from band to sleeve. She said just remove the band and do it the old fashioned way.

Interesting, thanks for sharing. I believe once the nomenclature of disease is established the potential treatments follow.

The gas pain is from the gas they pump inside the cavity for the operation. Gas X won't touch. it has to absorb back into the body. I went on youtube and found leslie sansone's walk off the pounds and did the one mile walk every day. Doc said to keep moving that helps the body to reabsorb the gas.

been stuck twice since being banded in April 2014. For me it feels like food is stuck at the top of my esophagus. The first time it was because I ate something I should not have...potato chips...I know really dumb. The second time was because I wasn't being mindful to chew my food well. I was talking to my sister and knew the moment I swallowed that I had made a huge mistake. But, I survived.

I'm still trying to figure it out. I know it is partially due to stress, loneliness (when I lived alone), and control issues. I got to control what I ate. Sounds like and addict right, you take the first cookie and second cookie takes you. That is about right. I often binged on something I liked. giving myself the excuse that well I'll eat it all and then there will be no more temptation. How dumb is that. Might have worked if I never brought it again. But that little lying voice I allowed to tell me I had control... When I figure out the rest of the story I'll share it.....
Happy trails

Interesting, thanks for sharing. I believe once the nomenclature of disease is established the potential treatments follow.

Healthynewme,
You go girl. No way is this easy. Nothing works unless you work it.

Toomuchrose,
Practice now.

This made me weepy for some reason -- I must be emotional today and it's so moving to hear of that build in confidence, the self-esteem. I feel that, too, and I'm just so grateful and there's that part of me that wishes I had done this decades ago. Very inspiring post -- thank you so much! Best wishes for all that is to come. Oh, and @@relief57 love that "scenic route" -- here's to the long view and seeing what we see along the way........

Cupcakebaby,,
congrats on your pending nuptials. Happy to hear your story. I'm on board with healthynewme, This is a journey and should be categorized as the scenic route. The scenic route has its value in that we pick up information along the way. This definitely should be a reflective journey allowing us to pick up bits of insight regarding our relationship with food and lack of activity. Hopefully in gaining insight we can destroy all the excuses that halted progress in the first place and sustain whatever successes we earn THE HARD WAY.
So Banders and other WLS recipients happy trails and enjoy the view.

Healthynewme,
You go girl. No way is this easy. Nothing works unless you work it.

been stuck twice since being banded in April 2014. For me it feels like food is stuck at the top of my esophagus. The first time it was because I ate something I should not have...potato chips...I know really dumb. The second time was because I wasn't being mindful to chew my food well. I was talking to my sister and knew the moment I swallowed that I had made a huge mistake. But, I survived.

been stuck twice since being banded in April 2014. For me it feels like food is stuck at the top of my esophagus. The first time it was because I ate something I should not have...potato chips...I know really dumb. The second time was because I wasn't being mindful to chew my food well. I was talking to my sister and knew the moment I swallowed that I had made a huge mistake. But, I survived.

I went to my class reunion this past Saturday. Saw friends of mine from as early as Kindergarten. Many of these friends I see periodically, others I haven't seen for years. One friend of mine, who is a nutritionist, comes up to me with all kinds of compliments on my weight loss. "Please tell me how you did it, " she asked. So, I start off with what I tell almost everybody that asks.... My husband and I joined a gym a year ago, and we work out six days a week. She didn't accept that, and asked all about the food (Of course she did, she IS a nutritionist). I told her that I eat smaller amounts and cut out eating a lot of the carbs I used to live on. "Oh," she says, "Glad to see that you did it THE NATURAL WAY." I asked what she meant by that...... "Glad to see you didn't take the EASY WAY OUT and have WLS." The next words out of my mouth..... "Oh, and by the way, Sandy," I said, "I HAD WEIGHT LOSS SURGERY TOO." Turned around and walked off...... EASY WAY OUT, MY @$$ !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I can relate. I didn't tell anybody at work (except one of the nurses just in case of emergency) and thought twice about telling my BFF basically for the same reasons. I didn't want the constant observations. I know it will come and i will get questions but, I think you handled it very well. You told the truth. That is what I planned to do. You are absolutely right the band is a tool for constant accountability to keep us focused. We can still override it and revert back to our old ways.. On Easter Sunday my niece took a picture of me with the dog and posted it on Facebook. It was not very flattering and I looked huge. I was comforted by the fact that in a few months I can post a new and improved picture with less of me. So don't worry about people remembering that you were a big girl. Just let them be amazed.
Good to hear of your success and keep up the good work.

Evoking the book The Things They Carried to a slight degree in the title, I have found a lot of comfort in carrying / displaying small items that represent the ideal/ energy/ medicine of this WLS journey.
I realize that my perspective and framework may not align with everyone, but with multiple conversations with some folks who are going through this I was encouraged to share what has brought me comfort, joy, and hope during an often scary process - at least for me.
Whether it was at a time when the dotcom industry placed an undue economic stress on millions of folks back in year 2000'ish (myself included) during a major crash, causing many of us to reinvent ourselves and our careers, or whether we are faced with interesting new challenges such as WLS where we engage the path before our feet with a measure of hope and grace, I have found that I my sanity and success required that I surround myself with representations of "intention" to lend spirit to the path before me.
For example, when I found myself looking for work for over a year when about 20,000 other IT professionals were saturating the job market, It was easy to become depressed and anxious. So during that particular journey, I bought myself a new plant for the office I "intended/ expected". I took much care choosing, feeding and watering this plant. Focusing the positive aspects of the journey (the outcome), allowing myself to embrace peace during the obvious ocean of unknown before me. I would later land my dream job, and realized that I had it within my power to engage that proverbial boat ride with anxiety, or with peace. The ride and outcome would happen, but the emotional responses (ones that particularly aid or thwart physical and emotional healing) were completely in my power to control.
With the pending WLS I will be having soon, I found myself surrendering to the dreams and emotional choices I had within myself to engage and build a relationship with. This brought about a series of powerful dreams for me. Granted, the way I am hardwired, I tend to relate to the world in the realm of totemic connections and metaphors that come through by way of nature.
I had a dream of butterflies that presented itself in the form of a tornado. Beautiful, golden colors. The next day I received an envelope with two butterflies of the same color, so I cut them out and placed them in my medicine bag that I wear around my neck. I also received a magazine with the same color butterflies on the cover. Coincidence? Perhaps. However, this brings me to the point of finding power for ourselves by using such things as synchronicity or any other thing(s) that we are able to construct for ourselves to lend power to our footsteps.
In this particular case, I now keep a framed picture of a butterfly above my desk to represent the ideals of reinvention and rebirth, directly related to this process we are all going through. It projects in my heart and mind the beautiful new me that is within reach now. I look at it whenever the process gets scary, or filled with doubt. I expect I will find peace in viewing its message when I am struggling with reinventing the way I speak, the way I eat, the way I exercise...
I share this in hopes that we are all able to find tangible ways to redirect our anxieties and to create pathways of bliss for us as we rise to our full potential.
It is within our power to succeed with the tools given to us by way of WLS. Having a representation that we can look at and "remember" can help us when we are struggling and, ultimately, succeeding with the physical and emotional changes involved with practicing new eating and exercising regimens, and with learning to relate to the world via a brand new mirror.

Girl watch out for those haters. Next time just say "thanks for noticing" Let that be your mantra. Cause they will soon be saying "oh wow, you're really loosing the weight". Don't beat yourself up. I think I have psych'ed myself out. I don't like throwing up. So I chew slowly and well. I swallow and wait to see if I get that acidic feeling in my throat then I keep going. My doc says I should only eat as much as I can hold in the palm of my hand. Once I get to that point I back off. He also said to only eat when I feel hunger so I wait for it. I've convinced myself (after all the reminders from the community) that the band is just a tool. I feel like it provides me a constant accountability partner. With any accountability partner you can listen to it or override it, which defeats the purpose. Just remember don't let the haters get you down cause they are waiting for signs of failure. I haven't really told a lot of people. No one on my job knows. I don't need the extra pressure. Family is in my corner and I have given them permission to pull my coat tail. We just need to be honest with ourselves and learn from the journey. But hang in there you will get to that sweet spot when all you have to do is coast on your journey. We'll be cruising in no time. We got this!!!

@@JustWatchMe I feel that I've come a long way mentally through all of this. I've learned that I'm not perfect (which is why I'm on this journey), and that if I fall, I need to pick myself up and keep moving. My journey has had many highs and lows and I wanted to be upfront and honest from Day 1 on this website. I want others to be able to read my story and say, "If she can do it, so can I!" At first, I was so discouraged reading so many stories of people on here who do everything cookie-cutter perfect. I'm not like that. I screw up, and I find that I am way too often harder on myself than I should be. I'm learning that this is a trial and error process, but the important step is to NOT GIVE UP!
@@relief57 Yay! We are band sisters! So good to meet someone who was banded the same day as me. I'm really struggling right now because I have absolutely NO RESTRICTIONS. I can eat anything, which is kind of frustrating. My doctor said not to worry, and that it is because I have little to no liquid in my band. It doesn't even feel like I have a band, and the only way I realize that I do is by the incisions on my tummy. I can drink Water without taking breaks, and I don't really feel that I get full like I thought. I got on the scale and realized that I gained a few pounds back. I was really angry with myself, and someone yesterday told me, "Looks like you already put back on what you've lost." I was so irritated, but told myself that I will not let this defeat me!

Hey, thanks for the heads up

I love your post and your attitude. You go girl...

sorry pookybear!!!

I had to do the Adkins diet for seven days pre op. I lost 10 pounds. I thought the same thing, maybe I can do this on my own. Then I remembered I had tried Adkins in the past along with several others. I can loose the weight for a while but once I start back to my old diet could never seem to get on board again. The yoyo effect. I know the band is just a tool, sort of a constant accountability partner. But its the lifestyle change that we need to focus on. I hoping the band will help me solidify that lifestyle change. No matter what you choose its a journey and you get to choose your journey. Choose well grasshopper .
Good luck and happy trails.

I love your post and your attitude. You go girl...

Don't get me wrong...my ego hasn't gotten to the Beyonce "Flawless" stage: I'm flawless...I woke up like this, I woke up like this... Not hardly. I'd also like to add that I've never had a big problem with self esteem, even at my heaviest I felt attractive. I've had my band for about 9 1/2 months now and it has been a great journey to say the least. I enjoy the weight loss with this device and I like the fact that I can go off course, gain a few pounds, give it a day or two and be back to normal. Love it!
Anyway, while I've been losing, there are times when I feel like I am "bad built", out of proportion and simply without feminine form. Now that my weight as stabilized, my body no longer has to go through the big top, small bottom - normal - small top, big bottom - normal - big top, small bottom...you know the thing that seems to happen about every 5-7lbs. I haven't lost or gained in about two weeks and as a result my shape is truly starting to show and I love it. I looked in the mirror this morning and said to myself "damn...I'm sexy!" I've done that many times before (you have to give yourself pep talks or no one else will) but this time it wasn't forced and seemed to just slip out. I guess because I truly feel sexy, in a way that I don't think ever have before.

I had to do the Adkins diet for seven days pre op. I lost 10 pounds. I thought the same thing, maybe I can do this on my own. Then I remembered I had tried Adkins in the past along with several others. I can loose the weight for a while but once I start back to my old diet could never seem to get on board again. The yoyo effect. I know the band is just a tool, sort of a constant accountability partner. But its the lifestyle change that we need to focus on. I hoping the band will help me solidify that lifestyle change. No matter what you choose its a journey and you get to choose your journey. Choose well grasshopper .
Good luck and happy trails.