gypsynurse

Im a Travelling Nurse from Australia. I have always used food as a medication. I have yo-yo dieted with the best of you all and at my life heaviest was 220lbs (100kgs). I have over 3 years struggled with losing weight and only gotten down to 191lbs (87kgs) and my BMI remains 31. My biggest concern though is i have depression and high blood pressure (hypertension) which since losing 29lbs has NOT improved and i still require medication for the blood pressure. I have a strong family history of cardiac disease and strokes and i wish to make the change now for my own health. It really is more the blood pressure and depression (well managed without meds atm) that have driven me to do this, not so much the weight loss itself or the vanity of it. I just want to be healthy, have more energy and not have to take medication at 32 for blood pressure like i am currently. I am considering the gastric sleeve and have a local surgeon at home who is highly recommended. Some of my concerns are about having a sleeve and working shift work and I am an emergency nurse so i have a high stress fast paced job where i don't always get to eat regularly. Which has helped me get to here. Will i have loose skin. will my personal trainer and others i know who are using soley diet n excersie and won the battle, judge me because i need a little help.
I view the sleeve as a tool. Of course as i have read i can still choose to follow the nutrition guide my dietician helps me with or eat high calorie food n fats etc But i know my own mind and i see the sleeve as the tool that means i will have to re-think everything that goes into my mouth and be mindful about eating, staying hydrated and ensuring i get the right nutrients in my diet. Why can't i do that without the band? I dunno, i just eat without thinking, guts food down, n before i know it i just ate 600 calories. So i know its a long road. I haven't had my first appointment yet. But thats why I'm here. To see all the different ups n downs, the good, bad, ugly and indifferent so i don't go into this with false hopes or high expectations. No its going to be hard work n good n bad. But if i keep the eyes on my goal of being healthy not classed as obese anymore and have some perks like more self confidence as well then I've done a good thing and for once, not for anyone else like my friends, family, colleagues, patients....Nope this is for ME.
Look forward to being a member and using the best thing we have to get through this- each other, to help me out.