McButterpants

When I decided to have surgery in August, 2013, I was at my heaviest weight, I was disconnected from my life and family, and I was completely miserable. I, too, was able to lose weight, but gained it all back, plus a few pounds for good measure. My doc was starting to talk about diabetes and my blood pressure was going up and up with each visit. I hated myself, I hated my body and I hated my life.
I finally went to my husband and said, "I want to explore having weight loss surgery." He asked me "Why?" Seriously, can't you see me? He couldn't believe I had gotten to 256 pounds - he didn't see that. I was still the same 25 year old girl he met 20 years before. I went to the surgeon's office, cried on the scale as they weighed me and walked out determined to have the gastric sleeve. I knew that no amount of dieting was going to get me where I need to be - what I would need to do lose 75+ pounds is not sustainable.
This is not a decision not to be made on a whim - it's scary. Do your research, know the risks.
For me, short of marrying my husband and having my son, this was the best decision I have ever made. My life is the polar opposite of what it was 2.5 years ago. I never, in my wildest dreams, could have imagined how awesome my life would be. There are ups and downs in this journey - I have recently been thru a down period - but I am back and I'm fighting again. This is not a magic bullet - it's hard work and you will live with this for the rest of your life. YOu have to be committed - you will never be able to eat like you did pre-surgery. Sometimes that is frustrating. All you can eat buffet? Nope. Soda? Not any more. But I have realized that a lot of those things that I thought I was going to miss, I don't.
So, research, research and research. Do some soul searching. Network with people on this forum. Decide if it's the right thing to do. If you decide you want to, you have to commit to it and the lifestyle you'll need to live.
Best of luck to you!

When I decided to have surgery in August, 2013, I was at my heaviest weight, I was disconnected from my life and family, and I was completely miserable. I, too, was able to lose weight, but gained it all back, plus a few pounds for good measure. My doc was starting to talk about diabetes and my blood pressure was going up and up with each visit. I hated myself, I hated my body and I hated my life.
I finally went to my husband and said, "I want to explore having weight loss surgery." He asked me "Why?" Seriously, can't you see me? He couldn't believe I had gotten to 256 pounds - he didn't see that. I was still the same 25 year old girl he met 20 years before. I went to the surgeon's office, cried on the scale as they weighed me and walked out determined to have the gastric sleeve. I knew that no amount of dieting was going to get me where I need to be - what I would need to do lose 75+ pounds is not sustainable.
This is not a decision not to be made on a whim - it's scary. Do your research, know the risks.
For me, short of marrying my husband and having my son, this was the best decision I have ever made. My life is the polar opposite of what it was 2.5 years ago. I never, in my wildest dreams, could have imagined how awesome my life would be. There are ups and downs in this journey - I have recently been thru a down period - but I am back and I'm fighting again. This is not a magic bullet - it's hard work and you will live with this for the rest of your life. YOu have to be committed - you will never be able to eat like you did pre-surgery. Sometimes that is frustrating. All you can eat buffet? Nope. Soda? Not any more. But I have realized that a lot of those things that I thought I was going to miss, I don't.
So, research, research and research. Do some soul searching. Network with people on this forum. Decide if it's the right thing to do. If you decide you want to, you have to commit to it and the lifestyle you'll need to live.
Best of luck to you!

@@bayougirlmrsc,
Thanks for the post! You are correct on a couple of points - I allowed snacking, grazing, bad foods and sitting on my butt back into my life. They came in slowly, but they came back. Taking the appetite suppressants has helped - it helped me realize how much snacking and unintentional eating I was doing. I was making excuses for not exercising - again, an old habit.
So enough with the "I should have"s…Here's what I've been doing since my original post...
I am taking the suppressants and they have helped. I'm hopeful this is a short-term solution and will talk to the dock at the end of January when I go back for my follow up.
I'm back on the exercise wagon - I joined a new yoga studio and I'm having a great time. My old studio did the same hot yoga routine every practice. While it was good at the beginning, it was time for a change. My new studio offers 5 different classes - I've taken three "shape" classes that incorporate yoga and strength in a 102 degree room. It kicks my butt every class and I love it. I can now do the entire routine with a 1 pound weight in each arm - something I couldn't do 3 practices ago. I'm also doing a challenge with my best friend and we've promised to hold each other accountable - we're doing the Run The Year challenge - we will do 2016 miles (combined), so I have to do 1008 miles in 2016. I did almost 900 this year. I also have a goal of 130 yoga practices in 2016 and 210 days of 10K steps or more. This should keep me on track. (I'm very goal oriented, so having a long-term goal that I can break up, keeps me motivated.)
I also had a really long talk with my best friend - we've been friends out whole life. She could sense something was wrong with me and she helped me talk thru what was going on. She said she doesn't want me to go back to those dark days where I didn't leave the house. She showed me a picture I sent her of my old drivers license and my new one - it's like they aren't the same person. I cried and it really hit home how well I've done. It's awesome to have support and a little attitude adjustment.
So, I'm feeling much better than I was a couple of weeks ago. I can see a change in my body with starting back at yoga. I'm down about 4 pounds, but I'm trying to stay off the scale for the next week while my body adjusts to the new exercise routine.
Thanks again for all the support - you guys are amazing!

@@bayougirlmrsc,
Thanks for the post! You are correct on a couple of points - I allowed snacking, grazing, bad foods and sitting on my butt back into my life. They came in slowly, but they came back. Taking the appetite suppressants has helped - it helped me realize how much snacking and unintentional eating I was doing. I was making excuses for not exercising - again, an old habit.
So enough with the "I should have"s…Here's what I've been doing since my original post...
I am taking the suppressants and they have helped. I'm hopeful this is a short-term solution and will talk to the dock at the end of January when I go back for my follow up.
I'm back on the exercise wagon - I joined a new yoga studio and I'm having a great time. My old studio did the same hot yoga routine every practice. While it was good at the beginning, it was time for a change. My new studio offers 5 different classes - I've taken three "shape" classes that incorporate yoga and strength in a 102 degree room. It kicks my butt every class and I love it. I can now do the entire routine with a 1 pound weight in each arm - something I couldn't do 3 practices ago. I'm also doing a challenge with my best friend and we've promised to hold each other accountable - we're doing the Run The Year challenge - we will do 2016 miles (combined), so I have to do 1008 miles in 2016. I did almost 900 this year. I also have a goal of 130 yoga practices in 2016 and 210 days of 10K steps or more. This should keep me on track. (I'm very goal oriented, so having a long-term goal that I can break up, keeps me motivated.)
I also had a really long talk with my best friend - we've been friends out whole life. She could sense something was wrong with me and she helped me talk thru what was going on. She said she doesn't want me to go back to those dark days where I didn't leave the house. She showed me a picture I sent her of my old drivers license and my new one - it's like they aren't the same person. I cried and it really hit home how well I've done. It's awesome to have support and a little attitude adjustment.
So, I'm feeling much better than I was a couple of weeks ago. I can see a change in my body with starting back at yoga. I'm down about 4 pounds, but I'm trying to stay off the scale for the next week while my body adjusts to the new exercise routine.
Thanks again for all the support - you guys are amazing!

I remember buying my first pair of shorts in the Misses section - I stood in the dressing room and cried. I took them to register and purchased them without even checking the tag. Reality sunk in when I realized about three hours later, but I didn't care. I will keep those shorts for the rest of my life.
Wishing you continued success and many trips to the Misses section!

You just put your body thru major surgery - you cut out a big portion of an organ. Let your body heal first, then worry about the weight loss. Follow your doctor's plan to a T - do not deviate unless given instructions from his/her office. They know what's best for YOUR recovery.
If you follow the doc's plan, you will lose weight. Be kind and gentle to your body - don't rush this. You didn't to 347 pounds overnight, don't expect to lose it overnight.
My other suggestion - don't weight every day (or multiple times a day). Get on the scale once a week - it will be better for your mind.

I just had my two year check up - I've gained 17 pounds.
Doc said to integrate shakes back in - this really does help my urge to snack. The thought of going back on shakes bummed me out, but when I saw how they helped, I'm back on board.
She also put me on appetite suppressants to try to help me get back on track - they have helped. I want that to be a short term solution to give me that jump start.
Lastly, make sure you focus on Water - this helps with appetite as well.

You just put your body thru major surgery - you cut out a big portion of an organ. Let your body heal first, then worry about the weight loss. Follow your doctor's plan to a T - do not deviate unless given instructions from his/her office. They know what's best for YOUR recovery.
If you follow the doc's plan, you will lose weight. Be kind and gentle to your body - don't rush this. You didn't to 347 pounds overnight, don't expect to lose it overnight.
My other suggestion - don't weight every day (or multiple times a day). Get on the scale once a week - it will be better for your mind.

You just put your body thru major surgery - you cut out a big portion of an organ. Let your body heal first, then worry about the weight loss. Follow your doctor's plan to a T - do not deviate unless given instructions from his/her office. They know what's best for YOUR recovery.
If you follow the doc's plan, you will lose weight. Be kind and gentle to your body - don't rush this. You didn't to 347 pounds overnight, don't expect to lose it overnight.
My other suggestion - don't weight every day (or multiple times a day). Get on the scale once a week - it will be better for your mind.

Don't get down on yourself - we all heal in different ways, it's not a matter of being strong or weak.
Ben gentle on your body - you just had major surgery. Take care of your body so it can take care of you. You are going to put it thru a lot in the coming months!
As as Miss Mac states above - don't compare yourself to others. Just because someone you talked to or read about on this forum says they lost 20 pounds in the first 5 days, doesn't mean that you will (it also doesn't mean it's true). You're body is unique as is your journey - embrace that. This is the one thing in life that is truly yours. You will have wonderfully fantastic days and you'll have horribly crappy days during this process. Those are yours and yours alone.
Hang in there and best of luck!

I remember buying my first pair of shorts in the Misses section - I stood in the dressing room and cried. I took them to register and purchased them without even checking the tag. Reality sunk in when I realized about three hours later, but I didn't care. I will keep those shorts for the rest of my life.
Wishing you continued success and many trips to the Misses section!

I remember buying my first pair of shorts in the Misses section - I stood in the dressing room and cried. I took them to register and purchased them without even checking the tag. Reality sunk in when I realized about three hours later, but I didn't care. I will keep those shorts for the rest of my life.
Wishing you continued success and many trips to the Misses section!

Hello all.
I have been absent from this form for a few months - I needed a little break, I've been so busy with work (traveled 10 out of 13 weeks) and, well, life happens.
So, I went to my 2 year follow up - a suspected gall bladder issue forced my hand. I was procrastinating going for my follow up because I've gained 17 pounds from my low weight. I was ashamed and didn't want to verbalize what I just wrote here. If I avoid saying it out loud, it's not as real. So I have been experiencing some discomfort when I eat and felt like I had to go in to get the gall bladder checked out.
My doc is awesome - I knew this, but I was embarrassed. She made me feel comfortable and I kind of unloaded on what's been going on. I've been snacking/grazing, not exercising like I should and think I have a problem with acid (which leads to more snacking). She ordered an upper GI and an ultrasound which happens next month.
She suggested appetite suppressants which alarmed me. My knee jerk reaction was "Really? I thought I wouldn't have to do that ever again!" She said this is "perfectly normal" at this point. We can use it as a jump start to get yourself back on track - it may not be a long term thing.
So I came here - my good old support system to ask…Has anyone else been thru this? What are your thoughts on suppressants? I'm researching more on my own, but would like some thoughts from my fellow veterans.
What say you?

I remember buying my first pair of shorts in the Misses section - I stood in the dressing room and cried. I took them to register and purchased them without even checking the tag. Reality sunk in when I realized about three hours later, but I didn't care. I will keep those shorts for the rest of my life.
Wishing you continued success and many trips to the Misses section!

This is such a personal topic and you will get many different responses.
Here's my story - I only told 5 people initially…my husband, son, parents and best friend. Since surgery, two years ago, I've told my another friend, hairdresser (due to hair loss) and my financial planner (weird, I know, he asked what I was doing to lose weight and I told him - he used to be a minister, so maybe it was a guilt think LOL).
I didn't not tell people because I'm ashamed, I'm just a private person and I live in a small town. I knew if I told someone that it would be shared with many many people by the end of the day. I didn't want that. when people asked about my weight loss (including my brothers and their family), I said I changed my diet, got some things straightened out with my doctor and I'm working really hard at the gym.
You need to do what's right for you - what YOU feel comfortable with, whatever that is.

I've never been a fan of gofundme.
There are places in the US you can get cheaper than $21K - I paid $11K for a great doctor in Las Vegas (flights are cheap, hotels are cheap and he's a well respected doctor with lots of experience). I think he's actually cheaper now.
If you go to the self-pay forum on this site you may be able to find something more reasonable.
Best of luck to you.

@@CowgirlJane - you are relevant. You were relevant to me when I was a scared pre-opper looking for help and guidance, you were relevant to me when I was newly post-op and had questions and you were relevant to me this past week when you responded to my first post in months. I always appreciate your views and frankness.

I've never been a fan of gofundme.
There are places in the US you can get cheaper than $21K - I paid $11K for a great doctor in Las Vegas (flights are cheap, hotels are cheap and he's a well respected doctor with lots of experience). I think he's actually cheaper now.
If you go to the self-pay forum on this site you may be able to find something more reasonable.
Best of luck to you.

I've never been a fan of gofundme.
There are places in the US you can get cheaper than $21K - I paid $11K for a great doctor in Las Vegas (flights are cheap, hotels are cheap and he's a well respected doctor with lots of experience). I think he's actually cheaper now.
If you go to the self-pay forum on this site you may be able to find something more reasonable.
Best of luck to you.

I remember buying my first pair of shorts in the Misses section - I stood in the dressing room and cried. I took them to register and purchased them without even checking the tag. Reality sunk in when I realized about three hours later, but I didn't care. I will keep those shorts for the rest of my life.
Wishing you continued success and many trips to the Misses section!

I've never been a fan of gofundme.
There are places in the US you can get cheaper than $21K - I paid $11K for a great doctor in Las Vegas (flights are cheap, hotels are cheap and he's a well respected doctor with lots of experience). I think he's actually cheaper now.
If you go to the self-pay forum on this site you may be able to find something more reasonable.
Best of luck to you.

Wow - I didn't expect to come back to so many posts! I love it when a topic keeps going.
A couple of things...
My doctor and i had a very frank conversation - SHE asked me if I was interested in the suppressants. When I replied with, "I thought those days were over" (meaning, I thought my days of worrying daily about my weight were behind me - I was scared, because I do not want to go back to that miserable person I was two years ago). She said, "This could just be the jump start you need.", ie. a short term solution to get my head right again, get back on track and regain control. She also discussed exercising on a regular basis - "exercise is not an optional activity", she said. We talked about an eating plan which will also help with the appetite - trying to fit in 3 meals (food for Breakfast, lunch and dinner), 2 shakes and the Water has proven to be difficult. If nothing else, I'm more focused again and I do not feel helpless. I am, again, working on McButterpants. So she wasn't prescribing and I'm not taking the suppressants as any magic bullet or a long term solution - like a couple of people mentioned, it's a tool.
On the "goal weight" topic - I gave up on my unrealistic pre-op goal weight a long time ago. Around the 18 month mark, when I hit my lowest weight, I realized that I was never going to get there and I was totally OK with that. During this process, this has become about so much more than a number on a scale. For 43 years I identified myself as the funny fat girl - I would make self-depricating remarks and people would laugh and I wouldn't let people know how unhappy, sad and full of self loathing I was. I would eat in private - I would actually look forward to when my husband and son would leave so I could eat. It was a horrible hell in which I lived. So, I was avoiding the 17 pound weight gain - If I didn't talk about it, it didn't happen. My jeans weren't THAT tight. My fear of going back to where I was 2 years ago, quite frankly, scared the $hit out of me. After a few days of regaining control, with the help of the appetite suppressants, I'm not feeling like that any more. I feel like I'm working TOWARDS my goal of healthy living, not avoiding (there is not a number attached to that "healthy living" goal").
I mentioned above this process has become more than the number on the scale - I want to expound on that, especially for the newly sleeved or the pre-oppers. My life is wonderful. This process has made me a better person - I have found out I am stronger than I ever realized. I smile ALL THE TIME. I am genuinely happy. I've become more outgoing - I make it a goal when I travel to spend time talking to one random stranger daily - that has helped with shyness and has helped me come out of my shell. My husband and I have a great relationship - we did before surgery, but now it's more (not too much detail, but the physical aspect of our relationship is much better - that was my hangup not his). My son sees me as a role model for physical activity - we work out together, we go to hot yoga together, we cook together, our relationship is stronger. Work - that has been a wild ride. I went from wanting to quit my job 14 months ago, to getting a promotion and now being viewed a valued member of the executive team. That wouldn't have happened 75 pounds ago when I was perfectly happy giving my ideas away freely and not speaking up in meetings. I now walk into a conference room and take a seat at the table as opposed to sitting in the background with my back against the wall.
I appreciate everyone's input on this topic and the twists and turns this thread has taken - people are very passionate about how they feel and I dig that. Some people like to tell stories of "worst case scenarios" - I've never been into that and while I read them, I don't let them rent too much space in my head. I could drive down the highway at 75 miles an hour and have a head on collision with a semi - that's probably the worse case scenario. But I will say, that's not going to stop me from taking that drive and looking at the mountains and enjoying the view.
Have a great weekend everyone!

I remember buying my first pair of shorts in the Misses section - I stood in the dressing room and cried. I took them to register and purchased them without even checking the tag. Reality sunk in when I realized about three hours later, but I didn't care. I will keep those shorts for the rest of my life.
Wishing you continued success and many trips to the Misses section!

I telecommute full time - I was operated on Friday and worked 1/2 days the following week. I couldn't have done more than that. It gave me time to keep in contact and keep my inbox from exploding, but allowed me time to rest, walk and sip Water, which is a huge chore when you're newly sleeved.
Best of luck to you!

I remember buying my first pair of shorts in the Misses section - I stood in the dressing room and cried. I took them to register and purchased them without even checking the tag. Reality sunk in when I realized about three hours later, but I didn't care. I will keep those shorts for the rest of my life.
Wishing you continued success and many trips to the Misses section!