Kindle

"The emotional first aid kit" by Cynthia Alexander
"Eat it up" by Connie Stapleton
"Get out of your head and into your life" by Steven Hayes
"Life Without Ed" by Jenni Schaefer
"Acceptance and Commitment Therapy for Dummies" and
"Feeling Good : The New Mood Therapy" by David Burns

also check out www.smartrecovery.org

It's always possible to lose weight, no matter how far out you are. The whole point of VSG is to provide a way to limit your stomach capacity. But as you learned very quickly it only works if you put good food into it. Your restriction will work with Protein and veggies. You already know the secret to losing weight. You HAVE to cut out the carbs or your surgery will be a waste. Go back to basics ....high protein and plenty of Water.

Sadly, you are one of the examples of the Bariatric industry focusing too much on surgery and not enough on the psychological aspect of weight loss. In the end, obesity is the product of addiction, not stomach capacity. Surgery took less than an hour, but it takes a lifetime of mental health support to achieve and maintain weight loss. Your story is unfortunately all too common.

For me, committing to changing my behaviors and developing new emotion coping stategies is the key to my success. I read dozens of self help and addiction books, joined an online addiction recovery program and saw a therapist for a year. Every day is still a struggle, but at 4 years out, 104% EWL and still within 10 pounds of my lowest weight, it has been worth it.

I suggest reaching out to whatever mental health support programs you may have available. I will try and compile a list of the best resources I found.

Why would you want to drop Water weight? It's not real weight anyways. And the resulting dehydration is bad for your heart, kidneys, brain and basically shuts down the metabolism of body fat. Kind of the exact opposite of what you should be striving for if you want to lose real weight and stay healthy.

1 hour ago, SouthernGirl76 said:

Are you using them for Fluid retention? Some people use them to dump Water weight and it’s a bad idea. Mostly used for people with congestive heart failure & high blood pressure.

What she said.... it's a diuretic used to control edema in CHF and HBP patients. Taking it without doctors supervision can lead to dehydration, cause electrolyte and thyroid hormone imbalances as well as liver and kidney damage.

Are you inquiring because your doctor is prescribed it or are you looking for a temporary Water weight loss?

Go back to basics. Whatever you did that first year after surgery, do it again. I regained 10 pounds in my 4th year from obvious poor food choices. Sure, my restriction is far less than it was the first two years, but it was the type of food I was eating, not the amount, that caused the regain. I had gotten happy and lazy and ignored all the Bariatric "rules" that had helped me lose 100 pounds and maintain for 3 years. Once I realized where I was headed, I went straight back to my proven weight loss high protein/low carb meal plan, added Protein Shakes back in and greatly increased my Water intake. Dropped those 10 pounds in a couple months.

good luck! You can do this.

10 hours ago, PrayingForWeightLoss said:

My boobs are sagging after losing 50kg so far. Belly and arms are fine so far. I could use a boob job but can't afford it.

Oh yeah, forgot about my boobs. Picture two tennis balls dangling in a couple of socks. Went from a 44DD to 34 A/B. I really wouldn't even need a bra if I didn't need someplace to stuff all the excess skin. Actually hard to find bras I don't fall out of when I bend over.

I don't own a scale. Only weighed myself at the doctors office in the beginning. Stepped on the scale at work once a month or so for the first couple years postop. But I can easily tell by how my jeans fit if I'm losing or gaining. I'm 4 years postop and I maybe weighed myself 3-4 times in the past year.

I had surgery on a Friday and was back to work the next Thursday. I am a vet tech so my work consists of 10+ hour days on my feet, bending, squatting, lifting, etc. I was up shopping and sightseeing days 1 and 2 postop, traveled via plane and car days 3 and 4 and was grocery shopping, getting my hair cut and plowing my driveway day 5. So if I was working from home I probably could have gone back within 1-2 days.

9 hours ago, summerset said:

Overgeneralizing and judgmental. Some people need a second chance.

Nobody gives a flying f**k if a patient needs a second fundoplicatio because of heartburn or a second PTA because that stenosis needs a second dilatation but God forbid that someone needs a second WLS procedure.

My point is, it doesn't matter if you have 10 WLSs, if you don't change your eating habits you will have the same results. I believe too much emphasis is placed on the physical side of WLS, instead of the psychological side. Stories of "failed" WLS all have a common theme, namely, poor choices when it comes to nutrition. With very few exceptions, obesity is a product of addiction, not stomach capacity. And unfortunately surgery and the surgeons that perform them do not address the addiction.

My sleeve definitely helped me lose weight, but it doesn't keep me from gaining it all back. Choosing grilled chicken, a side of greens and Water over a double cheeseburger, fries and coke does that. Took thousand of hours of introspection, therapy, and mental health support to be able to make those choices.

I'm 49 (had surgery at 45) 5'5" lost 100 pounds. Initially had major sags and wrinkles in my face, jowls, neck, upper arms, belly, butt and legs. My face, neck and arms tightened up nicely within a year. I Probably look older with the lines on my face than I did with chubby cheeks, though. Still have Looseness on my belly, but not too bad that I'm not afraid to show it off. Below my waist is a disaster. My ass skin is on my thighs and my thigh skin in on my knees. Despite wearing size 5/6 jeans, shorts and skirts are not a part of my wardrobe. But I'll take saggy skin over smooth fat any day!

I've been gone from this site for a year and I see nothing's changed. It's all just a huge drama fest. I'm not going to get into the argument, just give my 2 cents to address the issue of regain.

I'm 4 years postop and from personal experience, I can tell you restriction plays a very minor role in maintaining weight loss. The choices we make determine our level of success. If you make the same choices that got you fat in the first place, then you will become fat again. If you put the time and effort into getting help to address your inner demons and learn how to make different choices then you will have a successful outcome. Money spent on second and third surgeries is a complete waste and any surgeon performing them is completely unethical, IMO. The money is much better spent on a therapist to address the REAL reason behind your obesity. It has nothing to do with how much you can eat.

I'm 4 years out and still freezing. living in the mountains in Idaho where we have snow from September-June sure doesn't help. I wear long underwear 9 months out of the year. I've worn shorts about 12 times in the last 4 years and half of those were when I was visiting my parents in Arizona. I bought a truck based solely on the fact it had heated seats and steering wheel. The best Christmas present I've ever received was a 20 pack of LL Bean Wicked Good hand and toe warmers. My waterbed is set to 95 degrees, so really the only time I'm ever warm is when I'm in bed.

1 hour ago, soready17 said:

Whoa that's crazy...so how many ounces can you eat exactly now at 4 years postop? I just want a visual so I can comprehend the "ten times as much" part.

Sent from my SM-N910C using BariatricPal mobile app

Ok, 10x may be a little exaggerated, but it's pretty close to that. I have no idea how many ounces I can eat. I've never been a measurer/tracker. But for example, in the beginning I could maybe finish about 1/3 of a yogurt cup. Now I could easily eat 2 cups. Went from nibbling 1/4 Quest bar to now being able to eat two (not that I do, but I COULD) a couple forkfuls of salad would stuff me, and now I can easily polish off a couple cups of spinach salad. I used to struggle to sip down enough Water, now I can chug 8 ounces at a time. As for all the "bad stuff" (cake, ice cream, bread, candy bars, etc) there's pretty much no restriction. Solid Proteins like steak, elk, and pork chops are still pretty restrictive.....probably only 4-5 times as in the beginning. But back then just 2 tablespoons would leave me stuffed for hours.

But despite having less restriction, I still eat a fraction of what I did before surgery. I could not have lost over 100% of my excess weight without that severe restriction the first year postop. But in the end, maintenance is all about the choices I make, not my restriction.

I never had pain eating. As for stretching, you can't stretch your sleeve at 10 days out. If you do overeat, you'll blow out your suture line long before you stomach tissue would stretch. But you will certainly lose restriction over the years. At 4 years I can eat twice as much as I could at 2 years and probably 10 times as much as I could the first 6 months postop.

No comparison I was back at work day after having my gallbladder removed. Had absolutely zero "side effects" from the surgery. Took 7 days to return to work after VSG. 4 months of not wanting to eat and about 10-12 months before I felt totally "normal" again. Of course the other side effects, namely losing 100 pounds puts VSG at the top of my list for best surgery I ever had!

Haven't been here for awhile, but since Im at my 4 year surgiversary I thought I'd check in. 80% of this post is completely plagiarized from last year's update but it gives a good recap of all 4 years....

Year 1 - the year of losing all of my excess weight (100 pounds), dozens of NSVs, and a new wardrobe. By far, the most exciting year. Even the month of liquids, 6 weeks of diarrhea and 2 insanely painful gallbladder attacks couldn't put a dent in my enthusiasm. It was all so new and fun and easy. Life was great and I was invincible!

Year 2 - the year of finding out life still sucks no matter what size you are, losing my best friend to suicide, sinking into a deep hole of depression and finding that I could no longer rely on my old friends.....food, alcohol and cigarettes. Just struggling to get through each day with really no desire to. Two more gallbladder attacks which I finally put an end to with a long overdue cholecystectomy. Surprisingly able to maintain my weight loss from the 1st year.

Year 3 - the year of emotional healing (well, at least a start in that direction) with a grief therapist, testosterone replacement and an antidepressant. Finally able to crawl out the darkness into a somewhat bearable existence. My latest breakthrough is I actually said yes when asked out on a date about a month ago. Considering my introvert personality and swearing off relationships almost 20 years ago, this is an extraordinary step for me. We've been out 1/2 dozen times and I'm actually enjoying it.

Year 4 - the year of falling in love, being blissfully happy and regaining 10 pounds (yikes!) I'm still with that guy that asked me out back in Oct 2016. Enjoying my first totally honest, mature relationship. Ironically, I've found being a good bariatric patient is harder in good times than in bad. I've got better things to do than think about Protein, fluids, carbs and vitamin......everything has become less and less about surgery and weightloss and more and more about life.

So my downfall this past year has been cocktails and chocolate. Took up the bad habit of consuming both on a daily basis. That, and a lot of donuts and muffins! But the good news is I have already dropped 8 of the 10 pounds I put on. As always, it just takes going back to basics..... drink more Water, eat more Protein and less carbs. My BF is great and jumped on the high protein/low carb bandwagon with me. Of course being a guy, he's dropped 20 pounds to my 8 (stupid boys). I have every confidence I will drop those last 2 pounds before 2018.

Bottom line is successful WLS results is not rocket science. Whatever you had to do to lose weight is pretty much what you need to do forever. If you can't control sliders and trigger foods, they WILL lead to regain. If you don't make the psychological adjustments and permanently change your habits and behaviors, you WILL regain. It's totally up to you whether or not your surgery becomes just another failed diet. Don't be afraid to seek professional help with the mental side of it. Because as the years go on, that's what makes you successful, not how tiny your stomach is.

Good luck to the newbies. Congrats to the veterans.

I waited 2 years, 11 months and 9 days. And haven't stopped since ?

I'm a vet tech. On my feet all day, bending, squatting, lifting, 10+ hour days. Surgery on Friday. Back to work the next Friday. Couldn't lift more than 20 pounds for 3 weeks but had no problems working. I would have been bored stiff hanging out at home for longer.

I've been aware that Kindle hasn't been around for some time and, sheesh, now am seeing her farewell for the first time. Shall I speak about her or to her at this late date?

Kindle, you're good. Your comments were always well-considered, well-written and valuable. While your reason for leaving is most understandable, I wish you'd stayed and rebudgeted your expenditure of energy. It's not always easy to stick with the resolution, but it gets easier. If not that, there are vacations. I do hope you'll show up again.

All good wishes to you.

http://www.bariatricpal.com/topic/384092-three-years-and-a-lifetime-later/

Things have been going fabulous for me over the last month or so, which is a complete turnaround from the past year and a half. The date I went on in November has evolved into a pretty serious relationship. Something I never expected or was even looking for.

I gotta say, I don't miss the BP drama, But I may check back from time to time and just stay away from the craziness and stupidity. I do enjoy hearing how all the vets are doing. As well as some of the former newbies that are all "grown up" now

Hope all is well with you.

I am 3 years postop and went on my first date in almost 10 years back in November. My abstinence was by choice...I love being single and the freedom and independence that includes. Long story short, I said yes just to be polite when a client asked me to lunch. I had no intention of getting serious, or even going in a second date. But he Turned out to be a great guy and we are a hot item now. Anyways, back to your question. I told him about my surgery around the 4th date to explain why I ate so little (and drink so damn much water) He had made dinner a couple times and I didn't want him to think I didn't like his cooking. It is really a nonissue and he thinks it's great that I did what I did in order to be healthy and feel better. He also thinks it's great that I'm such a cheap date and he has no problem sharing appetizers or splitting an entree when we go out.

Good luck, and I guess do whatever you feel comfortable with as far as sharing about your surgery. In my case, he had no problem sharing about his past alcohol problems (been sober 16 years) or the medication he takes for depression, so sharing about my surgery was an easy and natural thing to do. This is definitely the most open, grown up relationship I've ever had. Of course, I haven't dated seriously since my 20's. This is much better.

Good morning, BP Campers. Thought I'd stop in for a a quick visit and update. I started my preop diet 3 years ago today. I always consider this my anniversary, rather than the surgery date. Here's a recap of my journey so far.....

Thanks for sharing Kindle. Some years after my 39 year old husband passed suddenly, I began to truly realize the definition of being a grown up. It's when you really start to understand that life is not always fair. {{hugs}} to you.

You're right. Being a grownup sucks. I was reminiscing with a college friend several months ago about how much fun we had when we were young and stupid. I remember telling her it's too bad we had to grow up because now I know too much to ever be happy again.

So it's very obvious the new newbies want nothing to do with hearing what successful WLS patients have to say. The recent debate over the the eating bacon 1 week postop makes it perfectly clear that what they want is for someone to tell them it's OK to be stupid. They are not interested in listening to their surgeons or nuts or veterans. Self sabotage is the new fad and compliance is apparently out of style. I made the mistake of responding to the post when, as a veteran, I should have known better. Turns out I'm just a big meanie (no surprise there!) At this point it's 95% newbies posting on that thread who don't have a clue what the long term repercussions of eating off plan so soon will lead to. The blind leading the blind.

Oh well. It will be interesting to see the stats of successful EWL go down over the next few years as more and more unprepared, uncommitted people continue to have WLS. In the meantime, I'm outa here. The newbies won. As hard as it is to tear my eyes away from the car wreck, I just can't take anymore people that do stupid shit and then whine about getting their feelings hurt. Someone PM me when the grown ups start joining again.

So yesterday was the 4 year anniversary of my brother's death (just one of many holidays ruined for me). I always find myself soul searching and reaching for hope around this time of year so here's today's random ponderings......

I saw a documentary about Gloria Vanderbilt a couple months ago. I only caught the last 1/2 hour of it, but found it very moving. Despite her amazing success in the business/fashion world, her personal life was really quite tragic. Her first husband physically beat her, her next two marriages ended in divorce and her fourth husband died during a heart bypass surgery. Her son committed suicide in front of her when he was just 23 years old by jumping from her 14th floor apartment. She was standing just a few feet away. Her youngest son is Anderson Cooper, a successful journalist for CNN. He was just two years younger than his brother and was interviewed as part of this documentary.

There were two quotes from this show that really struck a chord with me. One was from Gloria...." It's only after you accept that life is a tragedy that you can start to live" and the other from Anderson...."You have to learn to live in the world without knowing the why"......That's the one I am personally working on now.

Anyways, I know this isn't directly WLS related, but I find their strength and success in the face of loss and grief to be inspiring and thought I'd share.

I almost forgot the most important things.....all nuts and nut butters. They are my ultimate slider food and I can't stop eating them. I could finish off a whole jar or a 1000 calories worth of nuts without blinking, so they do not come anywhere near my mouth.