Daydra

This is such a personal choice. I hope that your fear of telling isn't motivated by embarrassment. It is admirable that you are doing what you need to do to improve your health and quality of life. I'm extremely fortunate. Over the years I have cultivated really good friendships (and it doesn't hurt that my circle of friends consists of nearly entirely therapists and social workers). They have all watched me struggle with my weight and work extremely hard to lose and keep off anything I might have lost. I also have a work group that are just an unbelievable awesome team. There will always be hateful and judgmental people out there, but I hope that you have at least a few people in your life that you trust enough to tell. You can do it alone, but it will be easier, emotionally in particular, if you have some support. Fortunately, there is definitely a shift happening from thinking of weight problems as a matter of poor behavior to looking at it like a disease process. Someday, society with look at this as a medical condition that is exacerbated by our ridiculous food culture, and not some failing on the patient's part, but it's too bad paradigm shifts happens so slowly. Wishing you the best! dd

Mine's 7 days, 870kcal/day. Basically the "slim fast" diet. 3 or 4 Protein shakes a day and 1 meal of either 230 or 380 kcal for dinner with the goal of losing 10 pounds in one week. (No sweat, right? That's only 1000 calories below my resting metabolic rate each day. Hopefully I won't have to exert myself during that time...) Good thing the payoff is worth it. What are you guys being directed to do.

And safety is job 1!!!

I'm willing to go so far as to say as long as it's not someone else's husband's breadstick...

This is what my surgeon told me... "For the love of God, if you don't do anything else, give the post op diet 100% compliance." The reason that you are on liquids only right now is that the only thing holding your stomach together right now is staples. Neglecting to follow the post op diet could do extreme damage. Your tissues are probably still swollen, so solids will not easily fit/pass through. If you stretch your stomach anywhere, that staple line could leak, and we all know those are bad, bad, bad. A bad leak could literally kill you or put you in the hospital for months. Sorry to be Debbie Downer, but there is real risk to not following the post op diet. Having said that, you mentioned pain. Someone already suggested this, but you really might be well advised to call your surgeon's office. Better safe than sorry. They would much rather hear from you that find out later that you had a complication that could have been more easily corrected if it was detected earlier. Best of luck, hope that you feel better soon. If it is just hunger, it will pass eventually. (usually sometime after you pull all your hair out, you head spins around in circles on your shoulders, and no family member wants to be in the same room with you any longer...) dd

What about those silly little clippie things? (Clearly I have no clue what they might be called...) They're 4 inches long or so and have little suspender clips at each end. You could clip one to the back of your top to pull it in from the back. Probably will look kinda dumb from the back, but it'll probably buy you quite a bit of time before you actually have to suck it up and buy new ones. They would probably be found at a fabric store. Congrats on your hard work!

My pleasure. Wish you the best.

Please forgive me for double posting if someone else has specifically mentioned this (I quit reading at page 4...). Please, those of you that are experiencing feelings of loneliness, feeling down, feeling regret, can't figure out how you are going to live your life with these enormous changes that you are making, find a therapist that you feel comfortable with. There is nothing "wrong" with you, you are simply making a huge life change and there are going to be an unimaginable number of emotions (both good and uncomfortable) that are going to go along with that. Sometimes family and friends won't understand. Forums like this one can't substitute for a professional therapist. Having a full range of really strong emotions is completely normal with this big of a life change, and you will need to learn what they are trying to tell you and how to deal with them. A trained therapist can help with that. Maybe you are experiencing situational depression, or maybe you are simply overwhelmed right now by all the changes. For many of us, our issues with weight is a result of other underlying emotional issues. That may not be the case for you, but there is a lot of emotion wrapped up in being overweight or obese. I expect that you will get hit with emotions periodically that you have no idea where they came from. After making such an enormous change to better ourselves, we deserve happiness and contentment with our new lives and our new bodies. Don't forget that "we" includes "you". That's going take some work and support for our mind, as well. I hope that this post is taken in the love and support that it's offered. Wishing happiness to all those struggling, Daydra

Get a tri suit. This is a one-piece zip up the front spandex athletic number that triathletes wear that can go from the lake to the bike to the run all without changing clothes. I do sprint and olympic distance races over the last 4 years at weights ranging from about 315 to 245. Danskin makes triathlon apparel, but I don't find their quality that great. Try www.teamestrogen.com and search for tri suit. Depending on your height and weight, you likely won't need a plus size tri suit. I'm 5'8" and weigh about 285 right now and I think I can still manage to fit into some of my tri suits that aren't plus size. If your weight on your banner is accurate, I expect that you should fit an xl in most brands (they are spandex, remember). You want them as tight as possible without restricting movement or busting zippers anyway. You would probably be better off picking one that offers compression. You will spend a significant amount of money on this garment, but I'm telling you, it's worth every stinking penny to be able to be active. You will still bounce, but it will provide enough support that unless you do something ridiculous, it shouldn't be uncomfortable. At least that has been my experience. Best of luck! (expect to spend $120 or so, unless you find a good deal) Daydra

There are at least 3 of us Westsound/Olympic Peninsula. Perhaps if everyone gets organized to plan periodic events, members east of the sound might be willing to hop a ferry at some point. Also, I sometimes ride the Olympic Discovery Trail from Blynn to Port Angeles. Could be an opportunity to meet up at a coffee shop or something. (Although admittedly, I'm expecting to get scheduled for surgery in the next 30 days or so, so I don't imagine I'll be doing a lot of riding for a few months...) Anyway, just some ideas.

I'm in! I just joined, so I'll look to see if there is anything set up yet! Really glad to find this group! dd

Thanks for that post. I've been looking for "real" information on this for a little while. Looks like we're pretty similar in age, height and starting weight. I'm really interested in hearing how your surgery went. It looks like you are probably neck deep in recovery right now. I hope that everything went well and that you are feeling as well as can be. Best of luck! Daydra

Hi All! My name is Daydra, and I just left a ridiculously long introduction on the 30something group, so I won't do it again here. I have been a Navy Wife for nearly 15 years and we are stationed at Bangor (Washington State). My husband is on shore duty currently, which I am, of course, extremely excited about. We have managed to stay at the same duty station since we were married in 1999, which is extremely fortunate for us, since we've always been tied to the area by my family and by owning a home here. I am an Environmental Health Specialist (an inspector for local Board of Health regulations relating to solid waste, sewage, food, and Water quality.) and have been doing that for about the last 5 years. I am currently working on fulfilling all of the requirements for my insurance and am pretty early in the process, but I did a "practice run" nearly a decade ago, so this is only new in that I'm planning a different procedure. I have my own insurance through my employer, so fortunately I have Tricare as my secondary insurance and should be well set up to choose where I go and not have many out of pocket costs. (I'm super thankful for that!) Looking forward to getting to know all of you and can't wait to hear about all of your experiences! dd

Greetings! My name is Daydra (feel free to just use my initals "dd"). I'm 36 (well, close enough for government work anyway). I live west of Seattle, WA. I am extremely pleased to have found this community and am looking forward to meeting all of you. A little (or a lot) about my weight loss background... I've been overweight my entire life and have no clue what it's going to be like to finally reach a normal weight. The first effort I made to lose weight was when my mom signed us up for Weight Watchers when I was 11. I've tried most types of diet plans, including Phen-fen when I was about 18, and most recently the HCG diet through my naturopath a couple years ago. Although I have been wildly successful at times, I never found any lasting success. The most weight I ever lost was 115 pounds from 2009-2011, but have gained about 60 of that back. My highest weight was 345, which was utterly miserable for me. About 7 years ago or so, I started the process of getting approval through the military medical system (my husband is in the Navy) to have gastric bypass done. I completed nearly all of the steps, but I really didn't like the surgeon I was assigned, didn't have a high level of trust for the hospital I would be at, and frankly, the whole process, potential complications, high potential for later nutritional deficiency, dumping syndrome, and the nature of bypass itself really scared the crap out of me. Ultimately, I balked and decided not to continue the process. Although I would really have loved to have been at a reasonable weight over the last years, but I am really glad that I didn't go through with it back then. I don't believe that I was ready at the time and could have been looking for a revision now. Over the last four years, I have been involved with a group of really great women that train for triathlon together. We are all shapes, sizes, and ages and focus on the completion instead of the competition. It's been one of the best things I have ever done in my life. I am a different person than I was the last time I researched bariatric surgery, and feel that with increased life experience, athleticism, and determination that I can be successful with this for the rest of my life. I have decided on the VSG, and am working toward fulfilling all of my insurance requirements for approval, but feel extremely settled this time with my decision. An now... I'm just plain getting tired of typing (as I'm sure you are getting tired of reading), so I'll let it go at this. I'm sure there will be plenty of opportunity to discuss all of our shared and individual experiences in the future. Best of luck to you all and I thank you for being here and making this space informative and supportive. dd

Best of luck to you! There have been lots of supportive comments here, and the most important thing to remember is that emotional reactions are going to be a normal and expected part of the entire process. You are likely to be surprised at your reactions at various times during your journey. (I'm sure you haven't gotten to this stage in the process without becoming patently aware of that...) Going to support groups, as noted in previous responses, through your clinic (if they are available) is a great idea, and I am very thankful to have found this community as well. I would also add that it would probably be extremely helpful to find a therapist to help you sort out your feelings and reactions. Certainly not out of any mental health challenge on your part, but simply to talk it all out. I'm early in the process of getting scheduled for surgery, but losing weight in general seems to almost peel back a lot of emotions that we don't expect. I anticipate having a lot of emotions to address along the way, and having a tight circle of friends that are in the mental health field makes me comfortable in the knowledge that seeking out a professional sounding board and guidance most definitely does NOT mean that we have any sort of mental deficiency. Congratulations and best of luck! Wishing you unlimited support, DD (Yay! I survived my first post! Hope it is helpful and didn't come off like a know-it-all.)