TES

Hey there everyone.
I know I have not been keeping up on my blogs... I guess its because I am now out living life and discovering who I am as a normal person. Finding out I like to hang out, I like to go to the gym, I don't mind being in front of a crowd now... As for normal life its kinda hard rite now, I just started a new job and its not really paying out what I hoped, so the bills are a bit tight rite now. But I can tell you that my cloths are not! I am having to sew and alter many of my cloths because I am loosing so fast! Thank god I can sew! Or I would be in cloths that looked like sacks and togas...lol
 
This sleeve is proving to be the most wonderful "tool"! And yes, everyone was right to say its a tool for weight loss! Its the thing that helps keep me on track. The reminder that I have a goal and that I don't want to stray from my mission.
 
As of this week I am 14 weeks post op. I have lost 71 pounds and almost 45 inches! (9 inches off my waist alone!) I have gone from a size 22 pants to a size 16! Everything looks and feels different. I can cross my legs when I sit, I can run up and down stairs, I can be on my feet for longer periods of time, I am starting to be able to ware high heals again! And when I pass by a shop window, I don't recognize the person I see in the reflection... The little changes and victories are endless! I am so happy I made this decision.
 
There are a few things for me that I have noticed are a little different than some of my other sleever friends. One is I am hungry regularly. I don't really know if it is what they call head hunger, or if my body is just telling me to eat more. I know that I am satisfied rather quickly, but I do feel hungry often.
I am able to eat most anything I want (in moderation) I have a little bit of a hard time with fried foods. I try to stay away from them in general, but sometimes my will gets the best of me... I am normally sorry in the end because my tummy dose not really like it... In general I am at about 1000-1100 cal a day... And I loose about 2 or maybe 3 pounds a week rite now...
 
I have been on the low end of my protein the past couple weeks. I have been making it a priority over the past couple days so I hope to see my loss pick up again. I have noticed it slow down a little. Im sure this will help. My other problem area is water ( I know, I am preaching to the choir on this one...lol every one has a hard time with water) I have been trying to drink allot more! I keep a glass full at work now and a bottle in my car. What ever it takes rite?
 
Well, I think I have covered most of the things that are going on with me. I want to be able to keep a record not only for myself but for all of you who might find a little help or hope in following my story. I know I am not supper interesting, or amazingly charismatic, but its my story... and maybe it will help someone...
All I got is my experiences and my personal victories...
 
To all my supper awesome friends out there... Thank you for your support! You guys are awesome! Sarahr and TTL you girls are the best! I am always able to talk to you guys... and especially my friend VSGkirk ... You have been so wonderful, and such a great friend... Thank you!
I am so glad we live close.
 
Until next time. Keep up the good work!

I'm happy to say I reached my 100lb mark (second mile stone) in 5 months! I'm comfortable wearing shorts around family which i haven't done it years! I've started couch25K as well. I would have never thought I'd be running! My goal is to run in the color me rad 5k next summer. I'm extremely happy with my success and I hope everyone else is enjoying this tool we've been given!

Okay so a month and a half after my surgery I found out my husband had been having an affair for 6 years. I was so depressed, angry, and my sleeve went on the backburner. I quit going on this website. I have been struggling just to get from day to day. I am so thankful that I had my sleeve as my confidence grew with every pound lost. Perfect timing. Now I am back a different person then before. I am going back to school, and am happy I have shown such strength. Yes we are still together and in therapy I don't know if we will survive this but I know I will. I am focused on me now, too long I focused on my husband that was lying to me for so long, now it's my turn to live a life i've been waiting for. World here I come!!!!!

Met this guy online and we finally decided to go out the weekend before last. I told him about my surgery up front, so that he can understand what's going on with me. We met for coffee, but ended up going out to eat. He first said that we should go to the Mexican place next door, but then changed his mind and said there was a healthier place we can go eat at. I told him he didn't have to decide on a place that's healthier just because of me. Honestly, I really wanted Mexican food badly. LOL We ended up going to this pita sandwich place. It wasn't bad at all. The sandwich I got was under 300 calories. I opted to get the grilled chicken breast to make sure I got a good amount of protein out of it. I was only able to eat half of the sandwich. This sleeve is really hard to get used to, mentally that is.
 
This last weekend, he took me out for breakfast. I had a spinich and cheese omelet. I declinced the toast, but went ahead and let them give me the hashbrowns, but didn't eat them. I ate only half the omelet. Gave me bad stomach pains. I'm thinking I must not have chewed it well enough. The restaurant is owened by this older couple and the lady asked me if I wanted a to go box, but gave me a horrible look when she asked. I so wanted to tell her that the food was really good, I just couldn't eat very much, but I don't think she would have understood.
 
After breakfast, we went to a park and walked around. It was nice to be around someone who is so understanding and suggests that we do things that he knows is not only healthy for me, but also for himself.
 
I really wasn't sure if I was ready to start dating again, but that was mostly because I wasn't sure if men would understand my situation. I am glad that I did find someone who is being supportive and understanding. Can't wait to see where the next date goes....

Had my 3 month appointment on 05/17/13. My doctor says I'm losing weight a little faster than expected, averaging about 3 1/2 pounds a week. I thought WTF? Don't get me wrong, I'm happy with that, but I thought it was a little slower than a lot of people. I know I shouldn't compare myself to others, but it's hard not to wonder why others are losing so much more than I am.
 
I went shopping over the weekend because I'm just tired of wearing clothes that don't fit right. What a frustrating experience. I'm still in the plus size section, but just can't seem to find anything that isn't ugly, to my at least. Of course, I'm shopping at stores that the clothes cost a little less because I know I won't be in them long and don't want to spend a lot of money on something that I will grow out of fast.
 
The other issues I'm having is although I look at myself in clothes and can't believe how skinny I look in them, when I take pictures, I still see that "bigger" woman that I was last year. It's hard to get those thoughts out of my mind.
 
I did go dancing on Saturday night, which I hadn't done in about 2 or 3 years and it felt so good to be able to dance through 3 or 4 songs without my ankles hurting or getting tired.

Hi, Why are you still sitting out there waiting to have surgery. I know for many, it is the fear off failing just one more time. I felt like that too, and I want you to know that "sleeve" surgery was the ONLY thing that has ever worked for me. I had it over 4 1/2 years ago and I lost 105 pounds and I have kept it off. STOP giving days of your life away. Make the choice to do something that is going to save your life. I am always here if you have any questions. Do something NOW, and I promise you, that you will never have any regrets

For the past few weeks or so, I have been trying to get my protein from solid pieces of food like chicken or pork loin. Up until now, I’ve been eating ground chicken or ground turkey – meats that were partially broken down by the grinding process. But now that I’ve switched to whole pieces, the switch brings up new issues.
 
When I was eating the ground meat plus vegetables, it was all mixed up like a casserole and keeping track of portions was as easy as spooning some into my half cup container. No muss no fuss no leftovers. Now it’s more difficult to judge just how much I can eat at one meal and I often wind up with a few bites leftover.
 
Enter the problem. I’m a kid of the “clean your plate club.” I was always encouraged to clean my plate (I think I got a merit badge, I was so gifted) and now that old habit is coming back to haunt me. Even when Frankensleeve (Yes, I named him!) is telling me I’m full and if I eat any more, he’s going to put the stomach in reverse gear, I still feel compelled to eat the last two or three bites.
 
Frankie: "Hey were full up down here, turn off the chewing machine."
Me: "But I still have 2 bites of meat left."
Frankie: "Okay guys, send up a burp as a warning."
Me: Burp. "Oooh, that one feels like it squeezed past some food to get out. But I'll go ahead and eat those last 2 bites."
Frankie: "Okay guys, put it in reverse!"
Me: "Uh oh."
 
Now, I am training myself to put the fork down and walk away. I really want this compulsion out of my life. It’s like having to go through the first few weeks post-surgery all over again. Learning when to stop and not take just one more bite – especially when it’s something extra yummy! Frankie and I will just have to build a new relationship I guess.
 
P.S. Frankie really doesn't like freshly dug, boiled new potatoes!
 
Leave me a comment and let us know what issues you struggle with. It helps everyone to know they aren't alone.
 
Keep Pimpin that sleeve!

I am almost at my one year mark. I really can not believe how much I have accomplished!! I am so much stronger, wiser and in control. Not only with my eating but with my life as a whole. My confidence is through the roof, my whole outlook on life and the way I approach life is different. Who knew taking control over my eating, would not only improve my health, but my life?!
 
I wish a year form now, this feeling stays the same. I wish all the good habits that I have picked up during this first year, will stay with me forever.

Soo today is my first official day of clean eating and it hasn't been that bad, I feel kinda hungry, so i've been nomming on carrots and strawberries.I had some gluten/wheat free waffles for breakfast, salad with chicken for lunch, a granola bar, and some delicious quinoa chillli for dinner. Then cuz i only had 1000 calories i had a turkey sandwich on rye with spin-NATCH. hehehe. It's been pretty tasty so far, but i still feel hun-gray, i think i just need time to adjust, prolly like a week or so and itll be easier x...x. I then jammed out to some bob marley with my dad in the living room, and now i'm just chiling, freaking out about my AP eng exam this friday, and us history on wednesday when those things are over i'll finally have a life and I can make some youtube videos!!Something delicious i discovered while tumblering is flavored water! You guys who are already sleeved have to drink a lot of water right? I need to drink it in the morning but at such an early time i just can't stand it for some reason.Ok so I got a platic juice container that was empty,filled it with water and chopped up 2 lemons and some strawberries so i can drink it tomorrow :3theoretically you can use any fruits like.. blueberries, peaches, pears, whatever you like, itll give your morning a nice kick.I only used a plastic juice container cuz im rachet but if you have a glass one its prolly a better idea to use that thing o...o

I am 7 days away from an 8 mile hike up to LeConte Lodge in Great Smoky Mountains National Park, 8 days away from hiking 5.5 miles down from that mountain, 9 days away from a 7 day vacation in Hawaii, and 32 days away from being sleeved. It is going to be an exciting month.
 
However, I have really struggled with the "food funeral". I have had binge like behavior for the past couple of weeks, and have basically let my "inner fat girl" have everything she wants, and the result of that...the added weight, the bloat, the heart burn, the sluggish "I just want to be lazy" feelings, etc have taken enough of a toll on me, and I have finally decided that enough is enough. It's time to start preparing my brain for what my body is about to go through.
 
Today I kind of gave the following talk to myself...
 
Dear Food,
 
You have always been there for me. You were there for me when I was alone in the evenings after school, you were there for me when people hurt my feelings, you were there when I was alone, you were there when I was rejected, when I was awarded, when I was celebrated. You were there through the loneliness of my teens when I didn't have any "real" friends..during the long hour and a half drive from my mom's to my dad's house when I started driving alone. You were there through my college years when boys rejected me, when the school work got hard and continued on into the night. You were there in my lonely apartment in my early 20's, and there when I went through the financial crisis which landed me back in my parent's house feeling defeated. You were there when I moved to a new state at 28 with my fiance' and I was stressed about leaving everything I knew and loved behind other than this one man. And you were there when my dad died of a heart attack at 57 (obesity related) one week after that move, and through the months that followed trying to get his estate finalized while living 500 miles away. You were there in the nervousness of my wedding, and of being a new bride. You were there through the stresses of every long day of every tax season, and then when I went out on my own as a bookkeeper. You have been there every evening to help me alleviate stress lately. You have been what I've looked forward to at the end of the day. You have comforted me, you have praised me, you have distracted me, you have brought me pleasure.
 
But you have also brought me pain. You have brought me "weight", literally. My bones hurt, my body aches, my feet are killing me, my back feels like it's in knots. My heart races these days with the slightest hill or stair case. You have made me depressed which caused me to ponder that death might be better than life when I feel I can't overcome your power. You are holding me back from my passions of the outdoors. I can hardly hike up hills these days without feeling like I'm going to die. My heel pain is just getting worse with every pound you add to my body. I don't feel sexy anymore... You are tearing apart my life and I'm only 32.
 
I thank you for having been there for me, but I think in order to have the best life I can, I'm going to have to part with you, or atleast part of you. God has brought other things into my life to take over the work you were doing all alone. I have a husband who can comfort me and celebrate me. I have friends who can help me to not be lonely and a bible study group to strengthen me when I'm feeling bad. I have a bike, a kayak, hiking boots and a backpack that will keep me entertained. I have a fantastic gym membership and a mini home gym that can keep me distracted from work when need be. I have kitties who can sooth me on lonely days when I need "love" (okay, my husband can do that too if he's not working late)
 
I will be okay with out large quantities of you. Our relationship is changing, and while I'll still partake of you, I need the best you, you have to give.... things that will make me strong and healthy instead of weak and lazy. The sugary things that I let sooth me have to go...perhaps one day I'll be able to enjoy a bite or two, but since you've turned me into a sugar addict, that day will be far away when I'm at goal and am finally in control.
 
Here's to change!
 
 
Tomorrow, I will start a low carb, 2 protein shakes a day (I have plenty of sample packets to choose from), and one protein + complex carb + either 1/2 a sweet potato or 1/2 cup cooked quinoa meal a day, food plan. I will get out of this sugar fog, and back into "the light". And I'll flush out the funk with lots of water and green tea. I'm ready to start my new life even though I am 32 days before surgery and am only required to do a 7 day low carb pre-op diet. I'm just ready! With my hike before Hawaii, and lots of hiking/walking planned in Hawaii (and fresh pineapple!!) I can stay on track until my surgery.
 
Wish me luck fellow pre op and post op sleevers! I appreciate you and your stories and questions more than you know!!
 
 
Edit: No need to suggest counseling...I've already been doing it for 5 months and will probably continue after surgery. I wish I could say it's helping with the mental stuff...but I don't see it.

On May 17th I will hit the 5 month mark on my weightloss journey. I've officially lost 63 lbs since surgery, made it into Onderland (at last), experienced the dreaded stall, had my pants fall off because they were simply too big (I call it the Pants on the Ground Phenomena), cursed my scale which I swear was broken for a month, had my rings fall off my hand, gotten tons of great compliments, rediscovered mirrors, stopped hiding behind people in pictures, flown on Southwest planes where people actually chose the seat next to me even though there were many others open, been ushered out of the plus sizes section at a department store by a well meaning sales lady who thought I was lost, started wearing high heels again, eaten too much too fast and puked, gotten very drunk off of very little alcohol, learned how much I love solid proteins, started exercising again, and have started reaching out to old friends as part of my reconnection plan - which was part of my New Years resolution. My life is 100% happier. I cannot imagine NOT having this surgery. I look forward to what lies ahead, and I although I expect that I will be cursing my scale again at some point, I have faith that the remaining 73 lbs will be worked off in time. In many ways, I've restarted my life at age 40!

OK, I guess I jumped the gun a week ago when I said I was no longer obese because I weighed 227 and my BMI was 29.9. Ever since then, I've been fluctuating between 227 and 229. Guess I'm in some sort of a stall. Oh well, I'm not really stressing over it. I know I'm still doing all the right things and it will move when it wants to.

My office has an official celebration for everyone having a birthday each month. And they bring out the goodies. Lots of cookies, dips, chocolate gooey thingies and of course cake.
 
For reasons unknown to me the thought of all those goodies lined up for the taking triggers something in my brain. I get a ravenous hunger that almost compels me to eat stuff that normally I don't even think about. I just want to bury my face in the cake and go, "Nom nom nom. Oh, you're a dirty cake aren't you! Nom nom nom."
 
I was able to restrain myself to just one piece of coated popcorn. I thought it was a coated nut. Honest! AND it was yucky! (That's my story and I'm stickin to it!) I am not looking for applause or a pat on the back, since I only did what I was suppose to do - for the past 35 years. Just wanted to share that we all have our weak moments and demons to fight.
 
Keep Pimpin That Sleeve!

I'm channeling my inner Dori and singing to myself...Just keep swimming, just keep swimming...in more ways than one. Today is 8 weeks and I lost a whole pound this week. So my 9# loss in Month 2 is a lot less than my 19# loss in my first month. BUT things are definitely changing...so I've just gotta keep going!
 
I joined a gym last week. After a little fiasco with the first gym I tried (a very uncomfortable experience) I ended up joining a gym that the whole family can go to. They have 3 pools and a great kids program and I think it's going to be a great place for my whole family. I have gone everyday since I joined and am doing a lot of swimming. I'm not a very fast swimming but I can definitely tell I'm working parts of my body that haven't been worked in awhile. My step daughter is a water polo player and she has taken it upon herself to be my personal trainer and is having me do her water workouts....well my version of them anyway She is either going to whip me into shape or kill me...LOL
 
My kids are swimming with me, and it's been interesting to hear their comments about Mom getting in and swimming and not just sitting on the side soaking my feet. Apparently, I have been missing out on a lot since I got heavier .
 
So I am walking, and biking, and swimming...trying to get in 5-6 days a week of some sort of activity. So even if the scale isn't moving very much, I KNOW I am in a very different place than I was last year at this time. I'm not the heaviest person at the pool, and I'm not the skinniest...but I am starting to feel comfortable in my own skin!!!
 
Heaviest Weight: 281
3/6/13 Surgery: 257 (-24)
3/13/13: 251 (-6)
3/20/13: 245 (-6)
3/28/13: 238 (-7)
4/3/13: 238 (-0)
FIRST MONTH -19#
4/10/13: 237 (-1)
4/17/13: 235 (-2)
4/24/13: 233 (-2)
5/2/13: 229 (-4)
SECOND MONTH -9#

This morning I bought a variety of Crystal light flavors and low and behold, there, on the top shelf, was Margarita flavored Crystal Light. I decided not to buy it but it is a thought for a different flavor.
 
I am trying to rule out anything I really do not like the taste of before surgery. I have yet to find a protein shake that isn't disgusting to my taste buds. I am going to try isopure next. Wonder where I can find those......
 
This week is dedicated to trying new clear drinks and other liquids....the best chicken broth, etc.
 
Once I survive the week of pre-op diet and the first few weeks after surgery diet, I can cope with anything.
 
Margarita's anyone?
 
Judy

So, I went for my 6 week follow-up visit on Thursday, and also saw my primary care physician the same day.
 
First, the follow-up. My surgeon was very pleased with my progress. I've mentioned about the scale discrepancies before. The first visit with the doctor, his scale and my home scale showed the identical weights (274), so that's what they had as my starting weight. Every visit since then, their scale has been 5-6 lbs higher than the home scale. So according to them I went up to 280 before the surgery, but they still have 274 listed as my starting weight. This last visit, they had me in a different office than usual, and that scale was 7 lbs higher than the home scale. So according to them, I have lost 36 lbs, even though at home I know it is 43. I'm not going to argue, they are still very happy with 36, and I would be also if I didn't know it was actually 43.
 
Now for the primary MD visit. He was amazed at the difference in how I looked, and my weight loss. My blood pressure was 110/80, and he said that in 2 weeks I can start cutting my BP pills in half and he would evaluate me again in 6 weeks. This is huge for me, getting off the medication was one of the major reasons I did this surgery.
 
Also, big news - on Friday my wife was sleeved! That's why I haven't blogged about this other stuff until today. She is doing pretty good now, her recovery has been much different than mine. She has had a bit of a rougher time than I had, but I know she will get through it.

Day 5 - Sunday, April 21st. I didn't sleep peacefully. Lately, I've been sleeping propped up on several pillows and it still feels foreign. I can't shake this headache. I think it's caffeine-withdrawal, but it could be aggravated by the residual general anesthesia administered during surgery. I have a history of not tolerating anesthesia well over weeks and even months after it was administered. My liver doesn't process toxins as well as the average person. It just takes longer to dissipate. I think I did too much Saturday. I felt like a rock star and wanted to do a lot. Going shopping was probably premature. I woke up Sunday feeling like I was hit by a bus.... Figuratively speaking, only. So, Sunday was much quieter. I SHOULD have napped, but, my mind was constantly going. I take care of my younger sister with severe CP, normally. She lives with me. We finished a 64 day hospitalization just a month before my surgery. I say "we" because I stayed with her. Pneumonia and a host of other life-threatening illnesses almost took her from me, but she recovered. She got her first tracheotomy and came home with a ventilator (life support). I have aides lined up to take care of her during the day and evening for two weeks while I recover from my VS. my husband does night duty. But, yesterday, there was a few hours that my sis and I only had each other to care for us. Not much needed to be done, but I needed to stay awake for her sake, so I never rested like I should have.
 
Also, I think I hurt myself. I shredded up 1/2 of a slice of (2% milk) cheese and put it in a mug with my hot tomato soup. I'm suspicious that's why I have this continual burning sensation in my sternum even today. I'm doing mostly clear fluids today. I'll do my best to get my protein in, but I'm going to be conservative about everything today. My surgeon changed me from Nexium to Pepcid. I'm not sure that was best for me.
 
Sunday night, I couldn't relax enough to get comfortable and fall asleep. I finally took an Ultram about midnight, hoping it would help me rest. It did. But today, Monday, I feel very drugged and sluggish. I think I'll put the pain pills away and just ask my husband to massage me till I fall asleep if I have another night like that.
 
The physical pain is almost completely gone. Just a few tender places on my tummy. I'm looking forward to getting back to work, but I need to get that pain pill out of my system first. I can't think clearly today. I never like feeling drugged or drunk. This, too, shall pass.
 
Am I sorry I had the surgery? Not at all! These quirks are to be expected and will pass. I'm really looking forward to how much better I will feel by my 52nd birthday in August. I consider April 17th my other birthday and will celebrate it every year.

hi friends, I have been on my liver shrinking diet since last tuesday, I started off trying the milk n yoghurt diet but after running to the loo at tea time decided to do the food diet like last time, I have lost 10lb in 5 days, I will get weighed tomorrow and it could be more, I had put 6lb on since christmas, so am pleased to have got that off and a good start to being near to my 19 stone goal for the day of my op.
I am finding the diet much easier this time and i think this is because i am having 2 eggs srambled on one slice of dry brown toast for the first meal of the day. I have a salad for lunch, 1 soya yoghurt and 1 apple at teatime and veg n lean meat cooked in my slow cooker for evening meal, i have being having 800 cals, 1 day i had 995, and lots of nas squash, tea with soya milk allowance.
I am having mixed emotions this time, last time i was excited all the time, but as it was cancelled and 7 months later back on, until i wake up and they tell me it is done, I won't let myself be too excited.
I know God is with me and my trust is in him, really hope i continue to be so positive and have no fear on the day, ive worked hard and waited 2 years 7 months for this, many friends are praying for me, thanks be to God, will write again before my op, x
I know this is what i want and God is with me, its the natural feelings i have to ignore, and i will be so happy when i wake up to find its done.
How i feel at the moment I would have it tomorrow.

4/22/13 : Time to start a new blog. One without chemo or radiation or surgery :-) It feels like it has been a long time since February 11 but it's not even May yet. Spring has sprung here in the bluegrass and it's such a balm for my spirit. Life abounds! I have been busy living - my strength is back, I'm even doing a bit of morning stretches and more walking. I'm soooo out of shape! I also haven't lost any weight in a few months but I know how to make it happen. I have to stop eating the goodies at night with the kids, unless it's a protein snack. We're planning on driving down to Florida in Julyl to see my family. Need to find a house to rent (with a pool!) that isn't a ridiculous price. I was going to drive down by myself but realized that my husband just couldn't handle the kids on his own for a week. He is 70 and just can't do it anymore. I am 56 and *I* can't do it anymore either! hahahaha oh well, together we manage.
 
7/26/13 : Right before we were to leave for Florida (what a fabulous 2 weeks!) I had a sonogram from my primary care physician because I had a pain under my right rib cage. He called me that evening and told me I have gallstones for sure but that there was what looks like a lesion on my liver that he was concerned about. I was scheduled for my post-cancer MRI the following Tuesday so I mentioned that to the oncologist. Right after getting the MRI, the oncologist was able to review the results and her verdict is that I have a tumor growing between the top of my liver and my diaphragm (which is why it hurts when I yawn or take a deep breath) and it is in the worst place possible and is inoperable. We both cried a little and she said she would talk with the radiologist about perhaps using targeted radiation to shrink it. So what did I do ? Heck, I went on a 2 week vacation to the gulf side of Florida :-) Had quite the time, although I did slip and fall on my right leg (water + tile = hazard). After the fall, my entire right leg started swelling and it hurt. Didn't stop me from having fun with my family. When I got back home I told the oncologist about it, just in passing, and she ordered a "doppler" (I guess it's just a sonogram) and the vein specialist found that I have massive amounts of blood clots in my right thigh. Now I have to inject myself twice daily with blood thinners (lovenox) and in 5 days start taking cumadin and keep my feet elevated all day long. The doc said I am very fortunate that I am not dead. See ? Cancer is NOT going to kill me... something stupid like a blood clot is going to get me ! hahahaha Anyhow, I have an appointment next Tuesday with the radiologist. We'll see what she can do and if that doesn't work, I will find someone who does know how to remove this "inoperable" tumor. I am fully prepared to die just not right now. God is good all the time.
 
8/21/13 : The results of the 2nd opinion I got at the Markey Cancer Center at University of KY yesterday weren’t good. My case was reviewed by a panel of cancer researchers and surgeons (among the best in the country, I hear). The large tumor on my liver is not alone – I have many tumors growing in my abdomen. So, there will be no surgery and no cyber knife radiation. The liver specialist at UK is going to discuss what kind of chemo would work on this type of cancer with my oncologist (he even told me congratulations on having such a rare and aggressive cancer) but that would just be to slow their growth. I’m not sure I am going to do chemo. If I could make this all go away, I would.
 
I am very thankful I have had all this extra time to get everything in order.

Moments away from getting on the shuttle to Mexico. No turning back now. Everyone here has given me the courage to move onward. It's my turn.
 

It's been a while since I've been on this site. It's always good to come back. I simply have been very busy and when I have extra time these days, I am usually choosing to workout rather than get on the internet. Yes, that is a lifestyle change in my new awesome sleeved body!! :-)
 
So..., I'm at the salad bar at my work and see a colleague coming towards me that I haven't seen for a bit. She says..."I saw you, recognized your hair, took a second look, and thought no that is not her, but then..., YES it is You! YOU look fantastic! You are so thin, healthy, fit and glowing!
 
I have to contribute it to my sleeve, incorporating a plant-based diet, daily hardcore exercise, and loving life!
 
Those kinds of comments sure do give a boost and affirmation for all the hard work. YEAH! I can not tell you how fabulous I feel.
 
VSG = the best decision, for me, EVER!

Hopefully the fact that the scale moved 2 weeks in a row means that the stall is over! It didn't move much, at least not compared to the first month but it's going down. So whatever speed it chooses to move is fine with me!
 
I have been trying very hard to listen to my body and eat when I'm hungry and stop when I'm full. Right now that's about 800-900 calories a day and I'm feeling really good. I have good energy and feel healthy! And my libido is in full swing (Hubby is loving the current hormones...LOL)
 
I am trying to bump up my intentional exercise. I have plantar facietis so when I walk too much I am in alot of pain, so I'm trying to rotate between walking and riding my bike. (Just to give you a visual, I have a super fun green cruiser bike with big flowers and and a basket!!). Monday I rode 6 miles AND took my dog on a short walk (she's a sausage dog with short legs so she doesn't walk far Gonna shoot for the same thing today. I'm trying to figure out the whole gym thing. I want to join one mainly so I can swim but haven't decided if I can justify the money. Then I could alternate between walking, swimming and biking...Hey wait, that's almost like a triathalon...right??? Whoo-hoo Go Me!!!
 
Heaviest Weight: 281
3/6/13 Surgery: 257 (-24)
3/13/13: 251 (-6)
3/20/13: 245 (-6)
3/28/13: 238 (-7)
4/3/13: 238 (-0)
FIRST MONTH -19#
4/10/13: 237 (-1)
4/17/13: 235 (-2)

The title is from an old nursery rhyme by Andrew Dice Clay.
Little Miss Muffet
Sat on her tuffet
Eating her curds and whey
Along came a spider
Sat down beside her
And said, "Hey, what's in the bowl b-i-t-c-h?"
 
I see quite a few questions regarding whey protein and I'd like to share a few things I learned pre-surgery in preparation for my pre-op and post-op diet.
 
Whey is one of the fastest digesting proteins and the quickest way :-) to get protein shuttled to your muscles. Whey comes from milk protein and contains the full spectrum of amino acids needed to build muscle.
 
Whey comes in several forms - hydrolyzed, isolate, and concentrate, isolate being digested faster and more completely than protein concentrate.
 
The Differences
 
Protein Concentrate: 70-80% pure protein and up to 5% lactose
 
Protein Isolate: Almost pure protein (90-94%) and near zero lactose and carbs, many people that are lactose intolerant have no problems digesting protein isolate.
 
Hydrolyzed Protein: Protein isolate that is broken down even more and is more easily absorbed by the muscles.
 
All three are good sources of protein and taking one over the other will not make a difference in how much muscle mass your body builds. It is only a matter of purity and the speed your body digests and transports the protein to the muscles.
 
Whey concentrate has less pure protein than hydrolyzed or isolate, meaning you'll have to take more whey concentrate to get the same protein in grams vs. isolate.
 
And speed of digestion and transport. Again, whey concentrate is the slowest, it is not broken down in the manufacturing process as much as hydrolyzed and isolate. Hydrolyzed=fastest, isolate=fast, concentrate=slowest. Is speed any great issue? I wouldn't think so. It's like the kids playing basketball, buying a pair of Jordans to improve their game. The difference a pair of Jordans makes for a nonprofessional athlete is so insignificant it's almost zero.

Happy 8 months to me! What a wild ride! I'm now down to 150.8 lbs as of this morning! I'm now lighter than I was in high school, and not even at my surgeon's goal yet. That is just amazing. My weight loss has slowed to a snails pace, but I'm so grateful where I am that I'm just thankful. I'm working on drinking more water everyday, and I work out at a Women's Only gym with onsite daycare 2 to 3 days a week. The weights have really started to pay off, and my body is really starting to firm up. My problem area has been, and always will be, my tummy. Giving birth and being overweight has just caused havoc, but as long as I look good in clothes, I'm not worried about trying to win any bikini contests! Big news- my mother had gastric bypass yesterday. She's recovering well, and it blew my mind she even did- she kept it secret for the most part until she actually had surgery. I don't know if I was motivation, or if her health was just so beyond bad she finally realized she needed surgery- I'm just glad she did it. I've never in my life seen my mother in a healthy BMI weight. This will be a very interesting journey to follow and watch. I'm checking in monthly on my anniversary date, and will try to continue to do so until my 1 year surgiversary. What I can say, what I will say, and what I have said.... the only thing I regret, is not doing this surgery sooner. So excited to enjoy myself and all my travel plans this summer! Last summer I was a hermit, and miserable. This summer- I've got an amazing list of places to go, people to see, and wonderful things to experience. Attached is a picture of me and my son this weekend, compared to a picture of me last year at this exact same time. I can't believe how much my face has changed!!!!
 
So, for the friends who have been inquiring what the diet I eat looks like... I eat 70% protein, 20% fruits and veggies, and 10% carbs and diary. I made sandwich wrap pin wheels, devilled eggs, fresh fruit cups, and honey mustard bacon wrapped chicken this week. I'm attaching what my sunday prep looks like when I'm packing snacks for the work week.
 

 

 

 
 
Height: 5'9
 
Highest (Surgery) Weight: 216
 
1st Primary Goal Weight for normal BMI: 169 (Achieved 11/27)
2nd Optimal Goal Weight set by Surgeon: 145
 
Sleeve Journey:
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~> 8/17/12- 216 lbs
Week 1 (8/24): 204.8 (-11.2)
Week 2 (8/31): 200.6 (-4.2)
Week 3 (9/7): 196.8 (-3.8)
Week 4 (9/14): 193.5 (-3.3)
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~> 9/17/12- 1 Month Anniversary (-22.5 lbs)
Week 5 (9/21): 191.6 (-1.9)
Week 6 (9/28): 190.1 (-1.5)
Week 7 (10/5): 187.0 (-3.1)
Week 8 (10/12): 181.9 (-5.1)
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~> 10/17/12- 2 Month Anniversary (-11.6 lbs)
Week 9 (10/19): 181.4 (-.5)
Week 10 (10/26): 177.9 (-3.5)
Week 11 (11/02): 176.8 (-1.1)
Week 12 (11/09): 174.7 (-2.1)
Week 13 (11/16): 173.3 (-1.4)
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~> 11/17/12- 3 Month Anniversary (-8.6 lbs)
Week 14 (11/23): 173.1 (-.2)
Week 15 (11/30): 167.3 (-5.8)
Week 16 (12/7): 168.1 (+.8)
Week 17 (12/14): 164.6 (-3.5)
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~> 12/17/12- 4 Month Anniversary (-8.7 lbs)
Week 18 (12/21): Holiday Break/Vacation- No Scale Available
Week 19 (12/28): Holiday Break/Vacation- No Scale Available
Week 20 (1/4/13): 164.5 (-.1)
Week 21 (1/11): 161.5 (-3.0)
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~> 01/17/13- 5 Month Anniversary (-3.1 lbs)
Week 22 (1/18): 161.7 (+.2)
Week 23 (1/25): 158.7 (-3.0)
Week 24 (2/1): Out of town- No scale Available
Week 25 (2/8): 157.2 (-1.5)
Week 26 (2/15): 157.2 (.0)
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~> 02/17/13- 6 Month Anniversary 157.2 (-3.3 lbs)
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~> 03/17/13- 7 Month Anniversary 153.9 (-3.3 lbs)
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~> 04/17/13- 8 Month Anniversary 150.8 (-3.1 lbs)
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~> 05/17/13- 9 Month Anniversary
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~> 06/17/13- 10 Month Anniversary
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~> 07/17/13- 11 Month Anniversary
 
ONE YEAR SURGERY ANNIVERSARY~~~> 08/17/13- 12 Month Anniversary

Seriously??? Did that happen to ME?? Three co-workers called me skinny yesterday. I have NEVER, and I mean NEVER, EVER, EVER been called skinny in my entire life. I am still trying to process the new me. It has taken some adjustments, especially trying to shop for clothes. I don't know what size to buy anymore---I find myself gravitating naturally toward the plus sizes. I still feel like and see myself as the fat girl, and it shocks the heck out of me to see a picture of myself. This is so bizarre, but totally bizarre in a wonderful, surreal way. I decided to have the sleeve for better health, and before the surgery, being thinner was not the biggest motivation for me. I have never been thin, and I had no plans or big ideas about what I would look like after losing weight; I just wanted to be healthy. I thought I was so prepared emotionally and mentally, but I just can't comprehend this new person I see in the mirror. I am very grateful that the weight is coming off, and having met my goal of being healthy has been great. But, I don't know how to deal with all of the attention I am getting. Part of me, of course, likes to hear the compliments. But, a great part of me is kind of embarrassed, shy, and feeling a bit overwhelmed with the questions: how are you doing this, give me some pointers, show me what you are doing, etc. Until I saw a recent picture of myself and compared it to my before picture, I just didn't realize the change in my body---I look in the mirror every day, so I don't see the changes as much. I have not shared how I am losing weight with a lot of people, so the questions of how I am losing weight is a bit difficult for me to answer. My standard answer on how I am losing weight is HARD WORK! I sometimes feel deceitful when people ask me how I am losing weight, but hard work it is!! I tell them I am on a high protein, low carb diet, and that I exercise at least 4 times a week. And that is the absolute truth! Does anyone else feel bad for not sharing the whole story when people ask you how you are losing weight?