BigDaddyJoe

She's done pretty well, down 55 lbs since April 19. She could do better, but she doesn't follow all "the rules". She doesn't always do the protein shakes, eats things like ice cream, and drinks these frapuccino things that she gets from Costco, even drinks soda occasionally. I don't dare say anything. She would get defensive, and tell me that I need to start eating those things. There could be something to the completion thing, I'm 15 lbs lighter than she's ever known me to be. I mentioned that to her, that she's never known me this thin, and just has to get used to it. Her reply? That she would have never dated me if I was this thin. SMH.

I don't know what the issue is. She is usually very supportive. I don't know what to think anymore, my body image is so out of whack. What I see in the mirror is not what I see in photographs. But if she is jealous or feeling threatened, she should be doing the opposite, not what she's doing now.

Haha, thanks for the laugh Bluto, I needed that!

time4me, I do need to dress 'younger'. However, I am 42, and don't want to look ridiculous, like someone trying to hold on to their youth. There's a delicate balance. My stepmother is only a little overweight, not obese or anything. She struggles with it, like most people. My wife suggested she may be jealous, but I don't see it.

Haha, Rebecca! The light jeans were from years ago, the only ones that fit me without looking ridiculous. I've since bought some newer ones that are darker and more in style. I wasn't wearing jeans yesterday, I had on black dress pants and a polo shirt. It was a 50th wedding anniversary, and I wanted to look nice. I usually dress 'hipper' than that.

Thanks kathp! I think how I was dressed did play a part of it. It was a newer shirt, so it fit correctly, but it was really long. I always wore long shirts before, to hide my belly. Shorter shirts tended to ride up in the front and always made me look fat. Ok, I WAS fat, they just let people see that I was. As for stopping the weight loss, I have my 6 month follow-up with my surgeon and NUT on Thursday, and definitely plan on talking to both of them about it. I tell people that when they tell me I need to stop losing. I don't think they expected me to have lost this much at this point, I sure know I didn't.

To be fair, she didn't make the statement to me, she said it to my wife, and probably didn't expect it to make it back to me. It was still hurtful.

Thanks everyone. I knew I had a distorted image of myself, but I didn't think it was THAT distorted! Cajunlady, my wife was the first one to start telling me I needed to stop, but she never said I looked older. In fact, we were 'intimate' the other night (for the first time in a couple years, but that's a whole other story!), and she said that it weirded her out because she felt like she was with a 12 year old boy because there was nothing to hold onto! TMI, I know, but I thought it was funny. Bluto, that does make sense. It has been a big change in such a short period of time for the people around me also, so their image of me needs to change as much as my image of myself needs to change.

Yes, I would like to lose a few more in case I end up gaining a few in maintenance. I don't ever want to see a number starting with a '2' on the scale again!

I agree, Serendipity! Almost like our mind is doing it to us. I know it will come off eventually, just seems like it's taking forever to start moving again. Before this past week, I was losing .5 to 1 lb a day for a little while.

It's funny how everyone is saying they lost weight after cheating. I was stuck at the same weight for 9 days (the dreaded third week stall), and said screw it, I'm eating Taco Bell. I was only able to eat 3/4 of a soft taco. The next morning I was down 2 lbs.

Great article, DayByDay, thanks for sharing!

GG, if you look at the rest of my blog, you'll see a post I made about my marriage. I'm more reserved, not outgoing, but I do play in a band. My wife is also getting the surgery, so we will be getting skinny together.

Thanks for the advice guys. I hear what you're all saying, but it is still upsetting knowing how hard this all is. I even told my wife last night that I "miss my stomach". I'd love to be able to eat a slice of pizza. I'm sure I'll look back and probably won't even remember this, and it does seem like a normal thing that people go through, so I won't stress about it too much. Someone in the forum said that as fat cells shrink, they fill up with water. Then, all of a sudden they let go of the water. True or not, I'm accepting that explanation, eases my mind a bit.

Newgrandmother, I didn't do anything different.

Carols, I'm a mouth breather also, but the pressure forces me to keep my mouth closed. I don't have to use a chin strap at all.

Thanks crossfit. I have several different brands of protein powder. I don't want to replace the milk with water, as that will lessen the amount of protein. I have been 'watering' them down by adding extra milk, and that does help some.

Lorac, it did feel good, therapeutic almost, to put it all down into words. It took me 2 hours to get it to where I was happy with it. I wrestled with whether I would actually post it or not. It was agonizing awaiting for the responses to start coming in. I'm a bit disappointed that most of the responses so far have been from my 'extended' Facebook friends (people I knew in high school, people who friended me because I played on 2 songs on a cd by their favorite band, etc.). Most of the people I care about from my 'real' life have been silent. Maybe they haven't seen it yet, I don't know. My brother did make a comment that he was proud of me for making a difficult decision that would positively impact my life.

Pantala, I don't mind at all! Feel free to steal as much as you like. While I may have put things down in words, these experiences or feelings are not unique to me at all. We are all on this site to help each other. I would even say that coming here and reading the forums and talking to people has helped me sort through my feelings and get to the point where I could put them all down on 'paper'.

Thanks so much for the positive words! It was something I felt like I had to do, but only AFTER surgery!

slimjim41, I am feeling so much better today. I feel like I could have worked today if I had to (I work a desk job). The first day was hard, but every day is better than the one before it. You would be abnormal if you weren't a bit scared, but you can do it. This will all be a distant memory when I'm skinny and enjoying life.

Sorry I haven't been around SmilingEyes,I just didn't really feel up to it or in the mood to go online. Don't be scared. Not saying its easy, but you will get through it.

Thanks so much, and good luck with yours! Just remember that even though the first day is hard, it does get better.

Thanks so much, SmilingEyes and lorac0119!

Thanks cricard. When you lose weight you might have to get the ring resized!