phil2912

Does anyone else feel that weight is more of a stigma in the gay community than in society in general?

I think maybe even more so for men....

Not in the bear community. I'm worried about being too thin.

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I agree not in the bear community. Although I don't really fit in to that (or any?) mould. I think I would have been considered a cub before but not sure. I don't really know how all that stuff works though. lol

I feel like chiming in here to give my $0.02 lol. It seems that with WLS the perception of food as a whole changes. Foods that we might not have thought anything of suddenly become 'bad' or are seen as dangerous to weight loss.

This seems true of the amounts of food as well. Normally 2 slices (or even 3-4) pre-surgery would have been standard. All of a sudden anything over 1/2-1 slice becomes too much.

While this shows us that we really were over eating pre-WLS, it also highlights, to me anyway, how easy it is to get caught up (or rather not be able to escape) the black and white/ good and bad/ all or nothing mentality that a lot of us struggle or struggled with in the past. Surgery doesn't seem to magically eliminate those thoughts because maybe we aren't taught to trust ourselves or our bodies to tell us we have had enough?

Again just my 2 cents/ thoughts. I really struggle with this topic so felt like contributing

I had the MGB with less intestine bypassed and only about half my stomach sectioned (rather than the 70-80%). Anyway long story short. It's apparently better than the full RNY and results are just as comparable to other forms of WLS. So you should have nothing to worry about

Good Luck

This has been an interesting experiment for me. I have a history of being very restrictive and of course tried every version of every diet out there prior to WLS at which point I declared myself out of the diet game. What's worked well for me is to eat when I'm hungry and not eat when I'm not hungry. That's my one little "rule" for this banded life and actually it's much harder to do the former than the latter. Of course I'd always bounce back again -- Yo-Yo-Yo is my middle name. For these reasons, this 5:2 brought up a lot of old "diet" behavior for me. The old "better have it now" and "I'm going to reward myself" instincts came roaring back. It makes sense to me that I could not resist trying a new diet -- because that's what I always did. I think if I could have approached this as lifestyle rather than the D word then I could perhaps have skated through and gotten the metabolic benefits without screwing with my head. But there it is, we all have our own histories, head games, etc. So I ended up going back to my regularly scheduled programming. Eat when I'm hungry. That's important for me. I hesitated to report out because I want to encourage you all to go, go, go -- but we all know how different our bodies our. And the brains, geez. There's a committee in my head sometimes that I have to shut down. I could tell my the self-talk over the 5:2 prep and counting, etc. that it's just not the right thing for me right now.

I actually think it's good that you have come to this realisation. I mean you are listening to your body and doing what works for you.

However... The mental games can be torture and while physically you can tell what your body needs you sometimes do have to try and quite the clutter occurring upstairs... I don't mean to be forward or offensive in anyway, but considering a therapist might be an option?

Happy Slim Sunday! I was nervous about weighing this morning and almost didn't. But I decided before I did that whether it showed a modest or a big loss or even stayed the same, I was determined to stay on course. I feel so good and my jeans were slightly looser yesterday so I was sure I lost something this week.

Between one and two weeks ago I was bouncing between 211-216 daily. Last Sunday I weighed 218.2. This morning I weighed 210.2. I've broken through my bouncing range and this is my lowest weight so far.

I'm really happy I waited a week to see these results. I'm also more determined than ever to keep eating cleanly and use this 5:2 method.

I had a little victory last night. I went to an early movie and didn't buy anything to snack on. As some of you know, I had been in a movie popcorn routine that was doing me no favors. Since I had not had dinner yet and wasn't even hungry, I just told myself if I came out of the movie hungry I could have whatever I wanted for dinner. And I did - low carb and delicious.

So much of this battle is fought between the ears. I think this week helped me strengthen some habit muscles that needed a good workout.

Off to church, then having breakfast at home, then meeting a friend for coffee at Starbucks.

Have great Sunday!

This actually made me incredibly happy to read! I'm so glad for your success! You should be so proud and your inspiring!

Well done

I'm not a psychologist and don't have kids so I'm the least qualified person to answer you. However that being said I do remember my mum telling me I went through a very similar thing at that age. I assume by 2 a child is aware enough to feel abandoned. Though please take heart that he is just miffed rather than truly angry. Talk to him and gauge his feelings. Kids at that age will generally talk very freely about their feelings if you get down to their level and show them you genuinely care why they are upset at u. (yes I watch TV (albeit trash) and read a lot of self help books... Sue me Lol *puts glasses on*)

This is VERY normal and will pass eventually. I was told that the best thing to do for gas is walk walk walk!

Congratulations btw and wishing you nothing but a speedy recovery, fantastic results, happiness and a healthy, fulfilling future!

5 months out and still feeling like this... I haven't mentioned it to the dr yet as it goes through phases. Give it time I'm sure it will pass but still talk to your surgeons

Peggy you aren't being lazy at all. The pre-op diet is some what of a shock to the system. Take it easy the few weeks leading up to surgery and don't exert yourself. It's a time for mental as well as physical preparation

Good Luck

Go for it... I have heard people argue against it but my personal opinion is that if it breaks your stall or helps you get back to the basics of why you had this surgery in the first place then it's a good idea.

Good luck and let us know how you go

I'm 4 months out and incredibly flat.

I'm getting tests to see what's going on. I did have a bit of problems earlier on and had an Iron transfusion a few weeks back but it still hasn't done much...

You're frustration is completely understandable.

Stalls early on are actually really common! Even at 2 or 3 weeks out. Additionally dependent on your treatment you may have been pumped with quite a bit of IV fluids. At times is might be very difficult to pinpoint the source of a stall but I've read that changing up the routine can help.

For example

- if you don't exercise, start doing a little.

- if you are at the puree stage and have say mash potatoes try cutting the carbs and increasing the Protein

- try to up your Water intake

- take your Multivitamins

- don't weigh yourself everyday

- relax and trust the process because unless you are purposefully sabotaging yourself then the weight is bound to come off...

- watch your sodium intake (no more than 4g or 1600mg a day) this can make you retain Fluid

I don't know how useful what I posted is, but hopefully you get the idea

Good Luck!

Phil

I like this thread... It's a good reminder that we are human and will slip up

I'd have to politely disagree with chelly Lol sorry!

As I posted somewhere else I've been chewing gum since while I was still in hospital! The doctors and nurses never said anything about it! Come to think of it I think one of the older nurses suggested it due to the terrible dry mouth I had.

Anyway I would ask your doctor or nutritionist just in case.

Lol I'm Asian. Asian food is pretty much all I want to eat. And lots of Chinese food is healthy. Stir fry without heavy sauces is healthy. Home cooked Chinese is not smothered in sauce, so ask if they can use a little bit of oyster sauce or soy and keep it 'light'. I will have stir fries at least once a week and honestly, stir fries done right will have minimal sodium, lots of veg, Protein and very little fat.

I have to agree with lellow (although I'm not Asian myself) making your own is a lot safer then eating take-out. I used to cook noodles, Soups, Stir-Frys, rice and all that before surgery. Admittedly I haven't made any Post-op... But it can be very nurtrious!

Anyway that being said if you are eating out it never hurts to ask them to modify it to suit your needs (ie. Less oil, less sauce, less noodles but more meat, etc).

Do what works for you and enjoy it

P.S. A trick I was told by a good Chinese friend is to sprinkle a little bicarbonate soda on the meat your planning on cooking (wash it off before preparing) This will tenderize it like the restaurants.

I wasn't told about gum or mints... I was chewing gum while still in hospital Lol the nurses and Dr didn't say anything... So I'm going to go with the majority of responses and say it's best to follow your doctors orders.

Good luck!

Thank you Ginger and Bandista.

I appreciate your support.

I will see a therapist it's just a matter of when. But I will try to keep you posted.

Phil

I can't thank you all enough for your supportive words!

I had an off day today (which did result im me eating a lot more than i normally have been) but I feel terriblyt guilty. Basically I have spent all day with a friend (who is going through some really rough issues) and I wanted to make sure HE ate... that being said he would only eat when I ate which frustrated me! But it was a good excuse to push me in the right direction I guess...

Anyway that being said I am seriously contemplating seeing a therapist, but i'm worried she will relay this eating disordered behaviour back to my dr and he will question me about it... and then reverse the bypass! (i got an Omega loop which is reversable)... I DON'T WANT THAT TO HAPPEN!!!

I feel so horrid for eating so much today... that and i don't want to stretch my pouch...

This is defnitly making me quesiton myself on a number of levels.

Anyway, again thank you for all your input and advice, if anyone else has anything to add please do! i'm always up for suggestions...

Phil

Hi Wayne,

Yep thats totally normal (at least for me it is!) im constantly bouncing up and down... the stall doesn't help as I fluctuate around the same numbers...

That being said weighing everyday was a bad and discouraging idea but I'd be hypocritical if I didn't practice what i preach... good thing I didn't say it lol my dietician told me

Phil

In short I'm scared to eat...

I've plateaued but am also worried about stretching out my stomach. I kept a food diary for a weekend so my Dietician could see and she said i wasn't eating enough... Probably on average less than 500cals a day. But I'm not seeing her any more (at least not yet)...

Eating has also become some what of a chore... Knowing what will and won't sit properly etc...

I don't want to see the psychologist but I'm contemplating it. I was diagnosed with an eating disorder a few years back, and started going through treatment but stopped for various reasons.

Usually the hunger hits in the afternoon/ evening, and while drinking something hot generally helps sometimes I can't help myself but have something to eat... For example today I had 4 x sugar free chocolate Easter eggs (which I know I shouldn't have had!) , 127cal wanton Soup, and 1/4 tea spoon Peanut Butter... Isn't that enough? Oh and some coffee made with skinny milk.

Why am I writing this? Well I don't know... To get some input I guess...

It seems to be a recurring theme for wls. I don't really have anything to add besides tell you I'm in the same boat and that weighing ourselves every day isn't the best option... I was told to weigh-in once every week if I absolutely must, otherwise every fortnight is better!

Yet I still torture myself with the scales every single morning Lol!

We just need to keep punching through and hope for the best! Keep the spirits high!

Phil

Ok this is going to probably sound silly but I'm going to go off the "poop" tangent mentioned above...

It might very well be in your colon. You might want to consider doing a detox and using a soft colon cleanser (magnesium oxide?) to get things moving. Keep in mind though it could make you retain a bit of Water for a few days as Water is drawn and flushed through the intestines...

But ultimately I wouldn't worry too much. Get back on track and get it done! Ur sooooo close!

Thanks Carol,

Your post made a lot of sense.

I'm going to try and speak to a therapist or something about the anxiety, doubt, uncertainty, and overall sense of distrust of the process...

Thanks

Phil

Thank you pancake

Who was your surgeon?

Dr. Greg Nolan on the Gold Coast.