parisshel

I'm not revising to anything (I have to get my band removed, but won't be moving forward with another WLS) but I will share with you what an expert bariatric surgeon told me about the bypass after band.
The bypass is the ONLY revision surgery that should be done after a [failed] lapband, and the reason for this is that it is the only WLS that not only offers restriction, but also works on the feedback loop from stomach to brain. Your appetite and food choices will be completely different after the bypass.
This is not true with the sleeve, which is merely restrictive, much like the band. (Band to sleevers, please don't jump on me for this statement. I know there are many of you out there that have had tremendous success with your revision surgery. ) This surgeon explained that if someone did not have success with a band, that same person would not have success with a sleeve.
She stated is was not ethical for a surgeon to revise a bandster to a sleeve, knowing that that same patient would eventually be back for a bypass.
FWIW, your decision to revise to a bypass is, according to this surgeon, the best way to move forward, as you will be altering not only how much you can eat, but what and why you eat. The bypass will effectively turn you into eating like a naturally-thin person, and for life. (Not just the "one sweet year" other WLS give you.)

No way of knowing before you do it. Be aware that, as it's the unknown, filling to the max could leave you wishing for death. No bariatric practitioner will do that, certainly not right out of the gate. If you really wish to limit yourself to soft foods and purées for a while, why not just make those your food choices with a reasonable, working level of saline in your band?
You'll do as you see fit. I don't know how much good work you've undone, but I'm there, too. In deciding how to get back on the horse, I wouldn't choose a route that might conceivably feel like punishment for having regained weight. That's what a period of soft foods and purées seems to me. The process of eating well and seeing results should be a joy. I don't see a month of mush, for example, as joyful.
Best wishes for your renewal regardless of how you do it.

I had an identical experience to what you are describing after having an unfill, and then refills. When I asked my surgeon why we "refillers" seem to report a lack of being able to refind original sensations of fullness/lack of hunger between meals/restriction, he answered "We don't know."
It's a drag, but it may be helpful to get in the mindset that your band ultimately doesn't do the bulk of the work after the initial, glorius first year (or so). Mine ran full power for the first year, making the weight drop off with little effort on my part, other than eating in a band-friendly way which was super easy due to my perfect restriction. Then I started having complications and a first unfill. I never found the original restriction once I was cleared to start refilling. As time went by, and my weight started slowly climbing, I told myself I had to throw out the fantasy that my band was going to do all the work for me. So I brought in my old tools (from my dieting years) and polished those off. The weight gain halted (I've been at the same weight for more than a year now--no losses, but no gains). I had to let go of feeling badly that I was "back to dieting" but you know what? At the end of the day, it still is easier, at least for me, to do this with a band (mine is now unfilled completely, due to other complications) than to do this as an unbanded person.
In short, I understand and have lived exactly what you are experiencing. My only "tip" is to "live like you have an active band" even if you aren't feeling it. (I know, it's not as easy as when the band was indeed active.)

Here's my contribution:
When someone shows you who he is, believe him.
In other words, don't make up a bunch of excuses for bad behavior, inept social skills,stinky hygiene, lack of job, blatant rudeness, etc.
I've had years of dating experience. The little things you pick up on first dates? And try and ignore because he's cute/you like the attention/you are lonely?
All those little things will be the stuff that you'll grow to resent down the line should you move forward in a relationship.

I had an identical experience to what you are describing after having an unfill, and then refills. When I asked my surgeon why we "refillers" seem to report a lack of being able to refind original sensations of fullness/lack of hunger between meals/restriction, he answered "We don't know."
It's a drag, but it may be helpful to get in the mindset that your band ultimately doesn't do the bulk of the work after the initial, glorius first year (or so). Mine ran full power for the first year, making the weight drop off with little effort on my part, other than eating in a band-friendly way which was super easy due to my perfect restriction. Then I started having complications and a first unfill. I never found the original restriction once I was cleared to start refilling. As time went by, and my weight started slowly climbing, I told myself I had to throw out the fantasy that my band was going to do all the work for me. So I brought in my old tools (from my dieting years) and polished those off. The weight gain halted (I've been at the same weight for more than a year now--no losses, but no gains). I had to let go of feeling badly that I was "back to dieting" but you know what? At the end of the day, it still is easier, at least for me, to do this with a band (mine is now unfilled completely, due to other complications) than to do this as an unbanded person.
In short, I understand and have lived exactly what you are experiencing. My only "tip" is to "live like you have an active band" even if you aren't feeling it. (I know, it's not as easy as when the band was indeed active.)

I'm also nearly three years post band. Just like Sharpie, I'm glad to see you online Terry and glad that you are doing well. I've been trying to get under 120 lbs. but find myself fluctuating between 120-125. As long as I don't have any issues getting into my pants, I'm OK with this as a final number. Hell...at 267 before the pre-op liquid diet, I'm more than OK with being 120ish. LOL.

Calendar reminded my that it has been 3 years since I got my lapband and I thought I would check in.
Total lost is about 70 pounds, but it does fluctuate. I am still wearing size 34 pants (down from 46), although this holiday season has made them a bit tight, I should be back to normal in a couple of weeks of regular eating. Still one of the best decisions that I have ever made, especially since I was diagnosed with Prostate cancer(currently in complete remission) a couple of years ago, the weight loss made the accompanying surgery and radiation much easier on my body. Lapband is/was not a cure for me, it is a tool. I still wrestle with emotional eating although that is becoming less and less. There are times I hate the band because it forces me to seek other solutions to emotional turmoil that do not involve food.
I don't visit the site very much anymore because my eating and weight are no longer a focal point of my existence, in that I think I am as close to normal as I will ever be. But this site and a large portion of the contributors were instrumental to me to getting my band to work for me.
Thanks.

"but I am still constantly hungry and not feeling near enough restriction (next to none). And despite the fact I am exercising daily, the scale still isn't moving!"
well you touch on a couple of the more vacuous definitions ("hungry/restriction") that are very subjective, and then insert the allegorical reality of objective science ("scale") by which to demonstrate dedication to process ("exercise") is failing.
I too have been frustrated by the fickle nature of My Little Angel of the Silicon Fist. The Lap Band performs for me, on average, "perfectly"......just as the 'perfect elevation' above sea level is the average between the Sierra Nevadas & the Jersey shores thrown in, if we can use metaphor.
I once went 18 months systematically tracking every calorie, every food, every exercise, and lost not one pound.
I was hungry too often and cranky too much. I suddenly realized in that period my pants had moved downward by 3 sizes, which I had somehow over looked.
And I agree we tend to focus way too much on 'what we want when we want it'.
Hunger is far larger a habit than I ever anticipated.
I don't know what 'feeling restriction' really accomplishes for the long run; it does thwart immediate hogging out on massive quantities of some foods. What is more effective for my own serenity, is to better identify that illusive break between 'feeling hunger' and 'feeling NON hunger'.
Usually the 'feeling restricted' produced far less results, and far more often the bleak emptiness of not being able to cram enough down with my eating shovel fast enough.
My goal is to be 'not hungry' rather than 'feel restriction'. Sometimes there is only 1 bite between the 'hunger' and 'not hunger'.
Feeling like a failure because of our fluctuating weight, is not a very scientific way to manage our emotional psychies.
Reverting to Bad Old Eating Habits now & then is a difficult behavior pattern to change. You can do it.
I have an antique Band: 4cc. I have been able over 12 years to only tolerate 1.6cc without major symptoms appearing.
So I treat myself as a part of a complicated cooperative association moving in the right direction for my goal, rather than flail myself for failing to accomplish what seems to have been an unrealistic goal.
Hope this gives you a few ideas.
Keep exercising!

Drinkable Mucinex will be good as you don't want mucus build-up on your stoma. Headcolds are a real drag with a band because the trapped mucus will put pressure on the stoma and make for more stuck episodes. Having a head cold is like a "poor man's fill"--you get super restriction without a doctor's visit!
So try and keep all the phlegm liquified. Otherwise you can use decongestants without a problem. Sudafed (if you can still purchase that---thanks, methheads!--) comes in tiny little pills that will pass your band fine.

I seeing nothing wrong with adding additional tools to your weight loss toolbox as you continue your post-op life. I remember when there were more bandsters on this forum and I remember several of the veterans posting about using appetite suppressants when after a certain amount of time with the band. I remember reacting like you, thinking "Hey! I got the band so I'd never have to deal with my appetite again!". But many veterans of WLS find that appetite does rear its head after a certain amount of time, and it's not just head hunger. It is your body overriding those wonderful initial effects of the WLS.
The good thing is that when you use the 1-2 punch of your WLS + medication, you'll have a super tool. You've already got the WLS in place, and the medication will be like "topping" off your surgery, hopefully. Kind of like re-igniting it.
Don't feel bad. Use everything you can to keep your weight loss going (or get back on track).

I'm on the same rollercoaster! Not that it's any fun. I am also self pay. I had an unfill in June and then gained 48 pounds. So my doctor told me to do the pre-op diet for 2 weeks. I ended up going longer. It jump started my system to lose again. Protein Shake for Breakfast, Protein shake for lunch, 3oz lean meat with 1 cup green veggies and 1 cup fruit for dinner. No banana, starch veggies and low carbs. Totally worked! I'm back to smaller portions and losing again. Give it a try.

Are you totally unfilled? If so, you need to get this checked out. We should never struggle to eat. If we do, we are putting pressure on the base of the oesophagus, this can lead to oesophageal dilation and, worse case scenario, oesophagus dysmotily which can be irreversible.

No. No. No. "Detox" is what your liver does. Your gut doesn't. And a colonic only reaches a very small portion of your bowel anyhow. food doesn't stay in your colon, your colon empties itself as it was designed to do. Anything else is pure hype. Don't fall for it.

I'll forgo this marvelous opportunity @@OKCPirate has introduced to detail the gargantuan costs to all citizens of the federal and state tax support for corporate welfare.
Instead, I'll stick to the info and support needs we see on our little message board here and acknowledge that my criteria for responding to questions and posts at Bariatric Pal include:
1) Is it a fun topic?
2) Do I like and admire the people who are already responding?
3) Does the OP / questioner sound like they've got enough of the necessary attributes (guts, smarts, humor) to be successful long-term?
4) Do they sound like they are generally positive and resilient about the situation they're in (no matter how awful it might be)?
5) Is the thread about clothes, underwear, or sex?
6) Might there be a chance somewhere in this thread to make fun of Donald Trump?

Not only are you cute, you've shown your daughters not to put up with abuse, not to allow themselves to be devalued, and to take care of their own destinies and their own health. Well done, Mom. Rock that dress and be proud!

I'm picking up my daughters from college for Christmas break next week. I'll meet my youngest's boyfriend for the first time. I told her I'd take us all to lunch. She suggested I wear my new black maxi dress because I look "cute" in it.
I had such a wave of emotions after I hung up the phone. I'm so happy to share her joy, and thankful she wants me to meet her boyfriend. It's the first serious fella since her senior year in high school. It also made me think of all the years I was the frumpy mom on the sidelines, hiding from the world, avoiding social events. It had an effect on my kids. I didn't realize how much until my life changed 180 degrees and I became a part of the world.
She told me she's proud of me. We've been through a stressful year and a half after moving out of our house when I filed for divorce due to emotional abuse. Through it all, my girls are amazing and strong.
My LapBand surgery and 100-pound weight loss not only helped me reclaim my life, but improved theirs as well. They now have a mom who can hold her head up high, can walk into any room and feel equal to the people there, and will never settle for less than respectful treatment again. I'm the good example I've always wanted to be.
And their mom is "cute" to boot.

It's a process, right? That's how I feel after I went back on a second blood pressure med this month. I was so sure that particular rx was a thing of the past. Oh well. I need to maintain a normal BP, and you need to sleep. Taking good care of ourselves isn't always done exactly how we would want it , but we have to do it.

Well, for those of you celebrating with me over breaking up with the sleep machine, we are back together again. I love the concept but it turns out I was waking up frequently, gasping and all the rest. It may be that I am with this thing for the duration. Last week I was really dragging, pain index high (I have arthritis) and just not feeling "myself." Well, I think that can all be attributed to poor sleep. I went back on the CPAP two nights ago and have had a complete turnaround. Plus my husband is happy as I'm not waking him up now, so there's that. My plan for now is to lose ten more pounds then go back for another sleep study to make sure the machine is tuned to my new body and working optimally. That's the update! An NSV Take-Backsie but I am still one happy woman.

This is a terrific thread with great contributions from everyone.
Here are my thoughts:
I agree with @@B-52, and I think we might be in a minority, but I do know from experience that my WLS was the only thing standing between me and consuming too many calories. It is not me making appropriate food choices, but my WLS tricking my brain into allowing me to make appropriate food choices.
How do I know this? Because with an unfilled band/no band, I don't make appropriate food choices, or, rather, it takes intense, consistent willpower to make appropriate food choices. (@@gowalking made an excellent analogy to pain levels with NSAIDS and pain levels without them...a world of difference. WLS is the NSAID for obese people It is an external aid to keeping us on the right, painfree (psychologically-speaking) path.) It does not make us more moral, noble or smarter. It just overrides our default [overeating] personality.
My weight-loss inducing food choices were not made because all the sudden I had some new-found wisdom/will-power/or healthy sense of what I needed to eat. No, the only reason I could eat less was because I had had WLS.
When one's WLS tool is no longer effective, we go back to our default (for the most of us). Because that's they way our mind and body works. It is not a moral failing, it is the way we are hard-wired.
If I see someone who I know had WLS and I'm watching them eat normal-size portions of food, or "unhealthy" food, or food that is not compliant with a post-op diet, I don't think "what an idiot." I know, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that their WLS choice isn't "active" anymore.
Because when our tool works, the idea of consuming large portions, or foods that are not WLS compliant, doesn't even enter our brains. Right?
Remember when you were fresh out of surgery? And your tool was sparkly-new? Did any of you start off by eating non-compliant foods?
No, of course not. Because your tool was active. And part of what is was doing was dimming your hunger and restricting your stomach space (this applies to all WLS).
An optimally-working, active tool translates to weight loss/maintenance. I really don't think that someone overeating after WLS is wasting their tool. I think that their tool isn't "speaking" to them any longer. Bands can go awry, sleeves can stretch, bypass I don't know about...but the sweet, effective timeframe of many of our tools can be brief for some of us. Yes, it is sad that someone would undergo such a drastic step to not have it turn out as one dreams (believe me, I know this from my own experience), but I really think the fault is more on the tool than on the person. Am I naive? Possibly.

New research is showing the while the ghrelin hormone is supressed initially with amputative surgeries such as the sleeve, the hormone actually seeks another pathway and will re-develop in the remaining bit of the stomach. This explains why some sleevers' hunger returns. The hormone's production is only temporarily supressed but it will seek a new way to express itself eventually. Hopefully, however, the patient will have developed good habits by that time (because really, that's the goal of all WLS, right?) and when the hunger hormone returns, he/she will manage just fine with exercise/reduced portions/happy healthy lifestyle.

I second the emotion of fitting in the world at a nice size!! This seems to be much easier at a smaller size.
I remember not wanting to stand up in a group ,room, theater when I was large... for fear that all eyes would be looking at me and my wide butt. I am happy to say that I haven't had that thought in many years.... And it probably wasn't so true... Who knows? ... But I know I felt that way....
It used to be my truth. And it is NOT anything I think about now... Ever.
I think it takes less energy and thought to maneuver this world now
And I am very thankful!!!

I'm not banded 5+ years, which to me is a veteran. I'm nearly 3 years out..so no newbie here, but again, not a real long term bandster just yet. Having said that, I'm heading into another season as a smaller person and some things I think, will never get old. When I can sit in an airplane seat and put the arm down and not ask for a belt extender..and can bend over to get something out of my bag on the floor, I can't take that for granted. Not when I can still recall with ease how those things were impossible prior to WLS.
Going to the airplane bathroom? 'Nuff said, right?
For the first time in a long time...not wondering if the clothing for the new season still fits from last year. Remember when you would pull out the sweaters, or the summerwear once the seasons changed? Remember the fear that something or lots of somethings that fit last year, wouldn't this time around? I moved all my summer stuff to the back of the closet and am working on bringing the late fall/winter stuff up front. I've worn some of these things again after months in the back of the closet and have not had to worry if it will fit. I hope I never get tired of that feeling.
Mostly for me, it's basically a feeling of fitting. Not fitting in...like being part of a group or not, but simply fitting physically into the space a person is supposed to occupy rather than the extra space we all needed and sometimes didn't get.

I'm 47 too and while my experience isn't identical to yours, I've had many similarities. I just have one thing to say: you are too young to spend the rest of your life without the kind of loving relationship you need to be happy. You deserve it!

Eighteen year old boy, hell. I am still this way, I was married to an ice cube. Things started well, then we got married and sex turned into a semi yearly event. In fact I can tell you when both my children were conceived as we had not had sex for months before, or after she got pregnant. My oldest daughter was a birthday gift..... My youngest was a Thanksgiving treat. I know what you are going through and feel badly for you. Both my wife and I remained faithful until after the divorce was over. Lol and she has remained celibate since then as well.
Sex is an important part of a relationship, it's the most intimate moments of a marriage. (Okay it can be, or it can be a carnal episode that leaves you both drenched in sweat, panting, and feeling full of joy)
Personally, I thank god everyday for free internet porn! But then again, I am a guy, it does not take much to arouse me, a picture, a webpage, a change in temperature, wind direction change, the sun rising or setting, a fly outside the window, lol.....
Best to talk this out, these are the kinds of unsaid things that unravel a marriage.
I wish you luck! And if you happen to find yourself in NH...... lol Just Kidding, I don't mess with married women, it's against my personal code.

I'm not revising to anything (I have to get my band removed, but won't be moving forward with another WLS) but I will share with you what an expert bariatric surgeon told me about the bypass after band.
The bypass is the ONLY revision surgery that should be done after a [failed] lapband, and the reason for this is that it is the only WLS that not only offers restriction, but also works on the feedback loop from stomach to brain. Your appetite and food choices will be completely different after the bypass.
This is not true with the sleeve, which is merely restrictive, much like the band. (Band to sleevers, please don't jump on me for this statement. I know there are many of you out there that have had tremendous success with your revision surgery. ) This surgeon explained that if someone did not have success with a band, that same person would not have success with a sleeve.
She stated is was not ethical for a surgeon to revise a bandster to a sleeve, knowing that that same patient would eventually be back for a bypass.
FWIW, your decision to revise to a bypass is, according to this surgeon, the best way to move forward, as you will be altering not only how much you can eat, but what and why you eat. The bypass will effectively turn you into eating like a naturally-thin person, and for life. (Not just the "one sweet year" other WLS give you.)