BlessedBeyondMeasure2012

Wow - great post!
Congrats to you on your loss, but better yet, congrats on getting your smile back.
Wishing you continued success.

Congrats girlie.. Achey cheeks are just a side effect enjoy..

I am currently smaller than I have been in at least 15 years. I can't remember what I weighed when I started college but I'm pretty sure that I haven't been this close to 200 since high school. My goal was to be 197 on Christmas. That will put me 9 months out from surgery and I will have lost 100 pounds since surgery. AND I think I can make it. I was lucky that I lost some weight before surgery so I've currently lost right at 129 pounds total and I am so thankful that I had a sleeve done. It has been one of the best decisions I've EVER made and I have no regrets (of course other than the typical "that I didn't have it done sooner" ). I have always been happy with who I am. Who I am amounts to more than how much of me there is but I have a whole new outlook on life. I feel better so I feel better about myself. I have always been someone who smiles all the time but now I seriously catch myself with achy cheeks because I am smiling so much. I feel so blessed to have had the opportunity to have this surgery. I am thankful for all the support I have at home but from this forum as well. I can't wait to be able to post my W-ONDERLAND picture of my scale in a couple of weeks!!!

I am currently smaller than I have been in at least 15 years. I can't remember what I weighed when I started college but I'm pretty sure that I haven't been this close to 200 since high school. My goal was to be 197 on Christmas. That will put me 9 months out from surgery and I will have lost 100 pounds since surgery. AND I think I can make it. I was lucky that I lost some weight before surgery so I've currently lost right at 129 pounds total and I am so thankful that I had a sleeve done. It has been one of the best decisions I've EVER made and I have no regrets (of course other than the typical "that I didn't have it done sooner" ). I have always been happy with who I am. Who I am amounts to more than how much of me there is but I have a whole new outlook on life. I feel better so I feel better about myself. I have always been someone who smiles all the time but now I seriously catch myself with achy cheeks because I am smiling so much. I feel so blessed to have had the opportunity to have this surgery. I am thankful for all the support I have at home but from this forum as well. I can't wait to be able to post my W-ONDERLAND picture of my scale in a couple of weeks!!!

I am currently smaller than I have been in at least 15 years. I can't remember what I weighed when I started college but I'm pretty sure that I haven't been this close to 200 since high school. My goal was to be 197 on Christmas. That will put me 9 months out from surgery and I will have lost 100 pounds since surgery. AND I think I can make it. I was lucky that I lost some weight before surgery so I've currently lost right at 129 pounds total and I am so thankful that I had a sleeve done. It has been one of the best decisions I've EVER made and I have no regrets (of course other than the typical "that I didn't have it done sooner" ). I have always been happy with who I am. Who I am amounts to more than how much of me there is but I have a whole new outlook on life. I feel better so I feel better about myself. I have always been someone who smiles all the time but now I seriously catch myself with achy cheeks because I am smiling so much. I feel so blessed to have had the opportunity to have this surgery. I am thankful for all the support I have at home but from this forum as well. I can't wait to be able to post my W-ONDERLAND picture of my scale in a couple of weeks!!!

I stepped on the scale this morning and saw that magical number that I set for myself in the beginning of this journey. My goal was to get to 230 and that is what popped up this morning. My surgery was on April 3rd of this year. At pre-op I weighed in at 362. So that is 132 pounds gone. And those pounds are gone forever!
At the moment I am still contemplating what to do from here. Part of me a very small part off me wants to say ehh I am good. A larger part of me wants to now change the goal. You see years ago I was at the highest weight I ever saw on the scale which was 418, so my full weight loss total to date is 188. That being said I kinda want to see my total loss be at 200. Seems like a pretty cool number to me. I know I can get 12 more pounds off. I will be deciding over the next few days on what to do I guess.
The journey itself was in no way an easy one. Sure I lost a ton of weight in a short amount of time but you HAVE to work at it. Did I sometimes eat things I shouldn't. Uh yes. But I was able to stack more good days together than bad. I have never felt better than I do today and I know that its only going to get better!

Great post, Laura. Thanks.
I'm newly sleeved - 4 weeks on Thursday and I find the eating, drinking, stopping drinking because you're going to have a shake in 30 minutes, drinking some more, oops, gotta have a meal now, but when did I drink last exhausting, truly exhausting.
I know it will get easier, but a post like yours reminds me that this is a forever journey, not just a year or two or three. It also reminds me that reducing the size of my stomach is only one aspect of this - we need to work on our brains, too.
Thanks for your perspective.

Thank you Laura for posting. I am 5months and 78 lbs out from surgery. This post is both encouraging and frightening to read. Encouraging knowing I am not alone in my food addiction and struggles with trying to find the place I fit in a world of people that encourage/support my journey and those same people who tell me "just a little isn't going to hurt you." Just yesterday after telling a dear friend that I gained 2 lbs over the weekend after drinking alcohol for the first time after surgery, he said "2 lbs, really get perspective, 2 lbs will be back off by the end of the week." I feel that people just don't get my mindset that 2 lbs hurt, the feeling that I could lose momentum and lose my way scares the @##$ out of me. So I too plan drinking, eating, exercise and sleep like it was the plan to world peace! This was frightening because I have read yours and other veteran posts and realize that this really will be a lifelong struggle.....but I feel with the sleeve, I CAN succeed...it will just be a battle that I have tools for. Again, thanks for posting and sorry all if this is a rambling blah blah blah.

Yes, the dance of trying to live the balanced life. This is one of the reasons I think it is so important to be as compliant as possible early on. We must develop new habits and new reactions to the curves life throws at us. We need to keep repeating these behaviors until they become the natural way we react.
I don't have to think about grabbing a Protein shake when I go to work out, it just happens naturally. My freezer is ALWAYS stocked with good, healthy, home-made Soups which again, I naturally grab on my way out to work. When stuck in a situation where I need to order food at a restaurant, choosing the option which has the best nutritional impact is easy now and I do not mourn not getting the chicken fried steak with mashed potatoes and gravy with a roll and ...
If it is still a struggle, then continue to fake it until you make it. Old habits die hard and my demons will always be there waiting for any sign of weakness. But, with the help of the sleeve, and some time under my belt developing these new habits, it is easier to make better decisions naturally.
Stress is one of my big red flags and I am smack in the middle of a very stressful time myself. I know that it will get better and no amount of (fill in the blank) will make it be any better. As a matter of fact, it will make it worse as now I would get to add the guilt of being bad onto my plate.

For those of you that don't know me, My name is Laura and I have a food addiction.
My addiction it is being managed through the sleeve and hard work, at the moment...
I have/had a food addiction yes, but I also have an addictive obsessive personality..
For the last year plus my life has been about the sleeve. It is my focus from the moment I wake until the moment I sleep.. My "social time" is spent here with others that live the same life now as me. They "get it", well most of them anyway.... There is commonality here and that is huge to me. After all, my food is taken away how else will "I fill the hole"?
Along with my time here, I spend time working on the mechanics of my sleeve life. I plan my liquids, I take great care to get them in. Time meals to come 1/2 hour after finishing a round of liquids. Try and start my liquids up an hour, if I can, after my meals. My meals are thought out to the extent that they are Protein and veg. These are the "rules" I live by.
In the beginning I have referred to the Water schedule as a full time job. And in a way after all this time my eating drinking schedule is still like a full time job. Or at the least a very choreographed dance I do....
If my day includes activities out of the "norm" it can disrupt my dance....
This past weekend life, and I should say one the more challenging parts of it "got in the way" of my sleeved life. It made me realize the road to hell truly can be paved with the best intentions.. My real life and my sleeved life collided with a force strong enough to knock my sleeved life off its axis a bit. I simply could not spend my time dealing with the all important dance of food and liquids and the support of friends..
Did I eat this past four days? Yes. Did I eat enough? To much? Protein? Trigger foods? Timed just right? I honestly don't know and didn't much care.
Did I drink my fluids?
No, that I can guarantee not. Unless you count take away coffees and chi tea.
In fact several days I'd notice that it was afternoon already and not a drop of water had past my lips.
All or nothing... The life of an addict.
But this does not work, it is not realistic if you want to succeed in the sleeved life and life combined. You need balance. I'm not good at balance I realized that this weekend. I am a one trick pony, a one hit wonder.. I will spend my next year trying to find balance.

Squirrels are rats with fluffy tails. True story.

Um....the deer over there must be alot different than our Texas deer.

Squirrels bark. Although to me it sounds like they are just laughing at my dogs...

Oh yeah, the green bean casserole has butter in it.
I, too, make everything from scratch. I also make croissant rolls, which ... yeah ... butter. I think the only thing on my table that doesn't have butter in it is the pumpkin pie and cranberrys.

Yep, he's eaten things that bark (deer, etc)- other than dogs. He draws the line at dogs, because they're mans best friend. Well, his best friends. He wouldn't eat cat I don't think either - because he can take or leave cats. Protected species are off the list, too.
He went without kisses for 24 hours, after he decided to chow down on sauteed scorpions... and crickets.. and grubs..
<gag>
Man of the land. Or should I say; Man of the swamp.....

Just gotta throw a funny Thanksgiving story in here. Two years ago we had some friends from the Philippines join us for their first Thanksgiving experience. When I cook Thanksgiving and Christmas meals, I do not hold back on the calories or fat.
They were absolutely amazed at how much they enjoyed everything and so when they inquired about how everything was made, our conversation went like this:
Them: The Turkey was so pretty, how did you do that?
Me: Well, you start with some butter ...
Them: How do you make the stuffing?
Me: Well, you start with some butter ...
Them: I loved those mashed potatoes, what do you add to them?
Me: Well, you start with some butter ...
Them: That gravy was excellent, how do you make it?
Me: Well, you start with some butter ...
Them: Is that toffee homemade? How do you make it?
Me: Well, you start with some butter ...
You get the picture ...
Yeah, I am an enabler.

You know my favorite Thanksgiving stories are from some of my work colleagues from India that have been here a few years. The year of the "tackling of the turkey" the stories are hilarous. appartently those large birds are scary to cook if you didn't grow up with the custom. If I ever have a situation where I don't have a family Thanksgiving I will definately host a group of non American friends just for the entertainment value - as I try to convince them that pumpkin pie REALLY IS awesome...LOL
So, on the emotional journey about food addictions - I think you go through multiple iterations of this experience. I think this is one reason people regain. You think you have beat the demons, and then a new angle comes up. I continue to do well staying on plan, but lately I have noticed a certain feeling of "it's not fair that I can't eat whatever I want" which was not how I felt a year ago. I assume a year from now, I will have a different feeling about food and eating.
For me, so far, daily accountability (the scale and non stretchy clothes), ongoing support, and determination to live the life I WANT (as opposed to eating the food I think I want) is working.

Maybe just sniff it even???? I'd ask for a glucose tolerance test, might be able to spike him over the threshold.....

. I'm lucky to be in a group that sees us in a good light. They're trying to get to where there are 2PAs for every 1 MD. REALLY cuts the overhead...but yes, doctors are a tricky group, you have to convince them it's their brilliant idea or the buck...gotta love em...cuz it's illegal to kill em.

I keep meaning to tell you my husband is an ER PA

as a PA that was once that scared student I'd like to thank your husband for donating his ass to science....we really do appreciate it!!!!!

Wait. Y'all don't just remove most everything in the doctor's office? No wonder she looks horrified when I start the stripper music.

I should be institutionalized, cause I fight with myself on wanting to look cute verses wearing light weight... Oh wait a minute while I take of this belt oh and this chunky necklace because it weighs 8 oz's

MR BRECHER PUT UP THAT WALL!!

Get it??? a play on "Mr. Gorbachev tear down this wall" by my idol Ronald Reagan
Hahaha I kill myself

You look amazing girl!!! Keep it up!!!