Day Dreamer

One day at a time... that's all I can do. And when he starts his fussing, I just kill him with kindness. Dr Phil said, one person has to stand up and say I will make enough changes for the both of us. When the changes no longer help then.. well then it is time to rethink the relationship. So my change, not fussing back at him. I will just be me...

Hey Stac and CCBC,

after waiting an hour for him to come to bed last night, I went out to get some water (I already had a full glass.. LOL). When I passed him I said, you not coming to bed? He said oh yeah, just gaming. He quickly shut it off and came right to bed. He was all lovey dovey. IDK maybe he is bi-polar. I was happy he seemed ok. He was really fussing earlier over nothing. Today he is back to himself but I still have to wonder... what the heck is going on with him. I have taken both comments to heart and I will try to be more understanding as well as show more attention. I will see if that works.

I just hope that people know losing weight isn't going to make your spouse love you more. If the love is gone, nothing is going to help unless both parties make an effort. I just read The Emotional First Aid Kit for bariatric patients which touches on the whole post op weight loss jealousy. A spouse may be very worried (like CCBC said) about your getting all sexy and leaving them.

I have been married 5 yrs and have 2 kids. There is nothing more important to me than family, but emotional abuse is NOT acceptable - no matter what is going on around you. If he does this again, we will need to have a heart to heart.

Good luck hun!! I am sure you will do great!! Keep us updated!

:cheer2:

It takes making the first step to get to the goal!! You are on your way!

I agree - you are so lucky! Your wife will be able to understand better. My DH is pretty fit - we met when we were both in the Army and he never lost that Army fit body! LOL (Mine flew out the window when I got out hahaah!) So yeah it is pretty hard going it alone, but I have VST and a few close friends. Plus my mom is like my personal cheerleader! I am really blessed in a way. And, maybe he will cheerlead when I am 'sexified' again

Your date is coming!! YAY!!

Stay positive!! Great post! (+) rep!!!

Reality really does set in the day of the surgery. I started my pre-surgery diet in Aug. 2010 and lost 22 lbs by the suregery date of 3/17/11. The day after the surgery I realized that this was all about me. If you have the support around you GREAT, if you don't, then get prepared to be your own support. This is so hard but soooooo rewarding. I got sick 10 years ago and started gaining weight every year after that . I am proud to be 51 lbs lighter today. I feel great. I am healthier. and everyday I look forward to losing more weight.**I LOOK GREAT TOO**. There will be negative people out there that will try to bring you down, it is up to you to put all that aside an focus on your goal. I wish you the best of luck.

This website has been a great source of support for me. I've been able to ask questions that any other person would not relate too or understand.

Good words of wisdom, thank you! I definitely have to be my own support system inside my house. I have many WLS friends outside home, IE work, net etc... that will be a great resource!

And of course - VST! I love this board! I dont want to be one of those people that comes for pre op chat and never comes back. If you guys don't hear from me post op, somebody better call my hubby and find out what happened! LOL

Congratulations!!!!!! Now you will big nothing but a big loser....lol....I bet you never thought those words would be music to your ears. Please keep us posted

Hahahaha! Yep Big loser.... finally it will be a compliment!

Hey good luck and congrats I know how u fill I get mine the 3 of June r u on facebook u can look me up and add me and I can let u know how it went for me Ericka Gardipee

Sent you a friend request!!!

I am taking 1 week off and the second week I want to be on half days. My surgeon said he would give me 3 weeks if I needed it though.

BTW I have a sedatary job - budget analyst. So no heavy lifting or anything to worry about. I just have to get up and walk every hour.

I sure hope your goes well! Just take some Halls or throat spray Let me know and Good luck!!!!

Congrats!! What an amazing loss!

Hi Ulysses,

the whole surgery will not cost more than 2k total for me. That is my max out of pocket. Not bad considering that self pay would be thousands more. I paid a $30 co pay for the surgeon but they have a program fee of $500. All of that counts toward my out of pocket though. One thing I have heard is that most Anesthesiologists are not contracted so you will get a separate bill for them?!?!

I was really shocked how fast the approval was - even the finance coordinator told me Anthem would take the full 30 days to approve.

Congrats on your surgery date hun!!!

Well put HLM Thank you

Very inspiring!! Thank you for sharing and congrats on an amazing 97lb loss

Your entry brings tears to my eyes; as if I were reading my own diary. I don't want to leave my beautiful girls without a mommy. I want to be there when they are mommies and many years after!! Like you, God held my hand and led to begin my journey. I am still in the approval phase but I have seen many signs that I was on the right path. Congrats on your weight loss and your new life. And thank you for sharing <3

Glad to hear you are doing so well Congrats on the great weight loss as well.

Bellah, you have an amazing attitude about you. I believe that is helping you to remain motivated. Your words seem so calm and well reflected. It sounds like you are doing a wonderful job!! Cheers

Waiting is definitely nerve wrentching. My coordinator told me that my insurance (Anthem BC BS) usually takes the full 30 days to approve. I am hoping for a quick approval so I can finally believe this is real. Right now, it just doesn't seem like reality. Good luck on your approval!! Keep us updated

Congrats Sarah, sounds like you are doing very well I started my MBA about 5 months and it is such a good feeling. Stay positive!! Hugs

Great Job!!!

Sorry to hear that :*( Maybe you could finance your surgery??

On the flip side, I am totally amazed by those of you that posted updates hours after surgery!! Luv you guys hahahah!

Once the scales gets moving, this will be a fleeting thought

Congrats hun!!! Will someone be going with you??