Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

Newbie and Scared



Recommended Posts

Hello everyone I'm starting my journey to weight-loss on Feb 22. I have read a lot of testimonials and I'm so thankful to each and everyone of you. My question is actually regarding if anyone is doing this because they don't have a choice. What I mean by that is I have major health issues. Stroke at 30, renal disease , one kidney, and high blood pressure. Every woman in my family this includes my great gradma, grandma, mom, and aunt all had heartattacks. Me and my mom are the only two left and I have 2 daughter. One of which is obese and following my footsteps. I have been overweight for 25 years and I'm 37. I fear my life is in danger and I'm next for a heartattack if nothing is done now. I have struggled for so long everyone because obesity is normal in my family. food is a reward and comfort. Weight-loss is so difficult and as soon as I get started a week later I quit. I did loose 90 lbs but ended up putting that back on plus more. That came on the heels of my divorce so I know that was stress related not intentional. I guess I'm just looking for some encouragement because I feel so ashamed I can't loose the weight and keep it off on my own. I see so many who are happy about their surgery in here but I feel like I failed myself. Any advice on how I can change my thinking moving forward in this process? Thank you in advance for your support.

Edited by cbrown1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Hello and welcome!! I definitely did this for health reasons first and foremost. I was always ok (but not really) with being the chubby one until my health started to take a dive (diabetes, fatty liver, endometrial cancer). Now, I am 8 weeks out, off all prescriptions and loving the changes I'm seeing.

I did 6 (actually 11 months due to the cancer) months of pre surgery weight loss visits. It was nice to start committing to the program, seeing some changes, and having the support I needed to get headed in the right direction.

Nothing tastes as good as being healthy for your kids. Best of luck to you on this exciting journey. We are here for you!!!

Edited by DaisyAmy

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Oh, and I know it's hard, but let the shame go!!! You are so brave to make this commitment to your health and to admit that you need help in this journey!!! No more shame, my dear!!!

Edited bc I was telling you to let Shane go. ????

Edited by DaisyAmy

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I used to feel the same way, what's wrong with me that I just cannot lose the weight like other people. When I went to weight watchers and all those people lost it and kept it off, why could I not do it. I could lose it, but never kept it off. Then one day, after thinking and researching the surgery for about 3 years, I realized I needed help, and the sleeve was just the thing I needed. I needed hunger control, and there it was right in front of me all this time. All of a sudden I just thought of it like having to have my gallbladder out, it just had to be done, and sure I was scared, but it was like a calm came over me and I told myself I had no choice, 6 months now, 78lbs and I am so grateful. Good luck.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I think you are doing a great thing. You have a medical problem and are taking the most effective known medical steps to fight back. In my mind, thinking you should be able to put obesity into remission "on your own" is comparable to saying someone with cancer shouldn't need to have chemotherapy and surgery, they should be able to heal themselves by eating organic food and praying a lot.

There are a lot of people who are too scared, too proud, or too ignorant to have surgery for obesity even though they desperately need it. You are not one of those people. You are brave, educated, smart, and not too proud to make excellent choices with your health. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise -- including yourself!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Welcome!

I believe a great number of folks here have had WLS because they felt "they had no choice".

It's an "if not now, then when" moment--at least it was for me.

We are here for you--to support you on your chosen path . Whether it's to tell you of our own journey, or to answer any non-medical question--if we can. It's more than likely that you will be able to share an idea, recipe, a found Protein treasure, an experience or just chat with fellow WLS'.

We welcome you and look forward to sharing the WLS world with you.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I understand where you're coming from! I am getting the sleeve on February 23rd and I'm very excited! But I also feel shame or a little disappointment in myself for having to go this route! But, I've seen it work for others! So I'm taking that leap of faith so that I will be healthier! Im praying that all goes well and that i can finally feel confident about myself and my body and not be so ashamed to wear certain clothes!!!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Please don't be ashamed of yourself. Hold your head up high. I believe most of us didn't come to this decision on our own. All of us has or had health issues related to our weight. Having any type of weight loss surgery takes courage and conviction. No one decided to have the surgery then had it performed the next day. We all had/have to follow whatever doctor's orders we were given to finally get to the surgery. So stand tall and be proud because you came a long way baby. Best of luck

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Be proud of you. We may all have slightly different reasons for doing what we are doing, but in the long run, we all have the same goals! To be healthy, to feel better and to be able to live up to our fullest potential!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Thanks everyone you have really helped me feel better. I think my focus may need to shift from self pity to being proud of myself for a new healthy lifestyle.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I am so proud of you. I am going through a similar situation and it is difficult. I, too, have many health issues which include the morbid obesity, hypertension, Migraines, lipidemia, depression, anxiety, GERD, lower back issues, hiatal hernia, etc. My Mom had to have a triple bypass. She was one of 10 kids and 5 died from heart attacks. Cancer got my Mom. My Dad died of cancer, but 2 of his 3 brothers died of massive heart attacks. I already have high cholesterol and high tryglicerides. I got to the point where I became scared. I want to stay around for a long time and be able to truly live life. I have naysayers in my life, too, telling me I can do this on my own. I know I can't. I have tried over and over. I have my surgery on Monday, the 15th. Only 6 days to go. This pre op diet is not easy by any means, but if all this will lead to weight loss and a healthier life, the naysayers can either be supportive or unfriend me. I am excited and scared at the same time.

I wish you all the very best as you get ready for this life-changing event. We are all going to do great!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Wow Shiloh I'm happy for you. I haven't even gotten to the point of telling others. I know with what I'm going through now if one person says you can do it on your own I'm back in my dissappointment mode. I have only told my husband and he is very supportive he wants me healthy and happy so he is on board no matter my decision. I haven't even shared this with my kids yet. I will wait until I start the process and educate myself more before I decide to share. But thank you for letting me know I'm not the only one our here feeling the way that I do.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

6 foot 2 314 and this stuff scares me about like reelecting Obama. had bladder cancer s. but didn't bother me like this. march 21st date. passed last year at this time , help

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I would suggest that you read some of the "My Story's", "Testimonials", as well as many other threads that you can. One can never have too much information.

Then ask yourself the hard questions:

1. Am I healthy now?

2. Is my weight causing my major health problems?

3. Do I want to live the rest of my days in the state of health that I'm in today?

4. Am I a good candidate for WLS?

5. Have I consulted with my God, clergy, as well as my doctor?

6. If I decide to have WLS, how will I pay for it and where will I go to have it done.(sad to have to include this question, but it is what it is)

7. Do I have family/friend support?

a. If not, am I strong enough of conviction to walk this path alone?

8. Am I ready for the life changes that WLS will dictate?

If and when you are comfortable with the answers to those questions----GO FOR IT!!!

We on this site are here to give you all the support we can muster--and we can muster with the best of them!!

Keep us posted as to your decision/concerns/fears/anticipations/expectations-----often.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • Prdgrdma

      So I guess after gastric bypass surgery, I cant eat flock chips because they are fried???  They sell them on here so I thought I could have them. So high in protein and no carbs.  They don't bother me at all.  Help. 
      · 1 reply
      1. NickelChip

        It's possible for a very high fat meal to cause dumping in some (30% or so) gastric bypass patients, although it's more likely to be triggered by high sugar, or by the high fat/high sugar combo (think ice cream, donuts). Dietitians will tell you to never do anything that isn't 100% healthy ever again. Realistically, you should aim for a good balance of protein, carbs, and fat each day. Should you eat fried foods every day? No. Is it possible they will make you sick? Maybe. Is it okay to eat some to see what happens and have them for a treat every now and again? Yes.

    • NovelTee

      I'm not at all hungry on this liquid pre-op diet, but I miss the sensation of chewing. It's been about two weeks––surgery is in two days––and I can't imagine how I'll feel a couple of weeks post-op. Tonight, I randomly stumbled upon a mukbang channel on YouTube, and it was strangely soothing... is it just me, or is this a thing? 
      · 1 reply
      1. NickelChip

        I actually watched cooking shows during my pre-op, like Great British Baking Show. It was a little bizarre, but didn't make me hungry. I think it was also soothing in a way.

    • Clueless_girl

      How do you figure out what your ideal weight should be? I've had a figure in my head for years, but after 3 mths of recovery I'm already almost there. So maybe my goal should be lower?
      · 3 replies
      1. NickelChip

        Well, there is actually a formula for "Ideal Body Weight" and you can use a calculator to figure it out for you. This one also does an adjusted weight for a person who starts out overweight or obese. https://www.mdcalc.com/calc/68/ideal-body-weight-adjusted-body-weight

        I would use that as a starting point, and then just see how you feel as you lose. How you look and feel is more important than a number.

      2. Clueless_girl

        I did find different calculators but I couldn't find any that accounted for body frame. But you're right, it is just a number. It was just disheartening to see that although I lost 60% of my excess weight, it's still not in the "normal/healthy" range..

      3. NickelChip

        I think it's important to remember that the weight charts and BMI ranges were developed a very long time ago and only intended to be applied to people who have never been overweight or obese. Those numbers aren't for us. When you are larger, especially for a long time, your body develops extra bone to support the weight. Your organs get a little bigger to handle the extra mass. Your entire infrastructure increases so you can support and function with the extra weight. That doesn't all go away just because you burn off the excess fat. If you still had a pair of jeans from your skinniest point in life and then lost weight to get to the exact number on the scale you were when those jeans fit you, chances are they would be a little baggy now because you would actually be thinner than you were, even though the scale and the BMI chart disagree. When in doubt, listen to the jeans, not the scale!

    • Aunty Mamo

      Tomorrow marks two weeks since surgery day and while I'm feeling remarkably well and going about just about every normal activity, I did wind up with a surface abscess on on of my incision sights and was put on an antibiotic that made me so impacted that it took me more than two hours to eliminate yesterday and scared the hell out of me. Now there's Miralax in all my beverages that aren't Smooth Move tea. I cannot experience that again. I shouldn't have to take Ativan to go to the lady's. I really looking forward to my body getting with the program again. 
      I'm in day three of the "puree" stage of eating and despite the strange textures, all of the savory flavors seem decadent. 
      I timed this surgery so that I'd be recovering during my spring break. That was a good plan. Today is a state holiday and the final day of break. I feel really strong to return to school tomorrow. 
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • BeanitoDiego

      Now that I'm in maintenance mode, I'm getting a into a routine for my meals. Every day, I start out with 8-16 ounces of water, and then a proffee, which I have come to look forward to even the night before. My proffees are simply a black coffee with a protein powder added. There are three products that I cycle through: Premier Vanilla, Orgain Vanilla, and Dymatize Vanilla.
      For second breakfast on workdays, I will have a low-fat yogurt with two tablespoons of PBFit and two teaspoons of no sugar added dried cherries. I will have ingested 35-45 grams of protein at this point between the two breakfasts, with 250-285 calories, and about 20 carbs.
      For second breakfast on non-workdays, I will prepare two servings of plain, instant oatmeal with a tablespoon of an olive oil-based spread. This means I will have had 34 grams of protein, 365 calories, and 38 carbs. Non-workdays are when I am being very active with training sessions, so I allow myself more carbohydrate fuel.
      Snacks on any day are always mixed nuts, even when I am travelling. I will have 0.2 cups of a blend that I make myself. It consists of dry roasted peanuts, cashews, pumpkin seeds, sunflower seeds, pistachios, and Brazil nuts. This is 5 grams of protein, 163 calories, and 7 carbs.
      Breakfast and snacks have been the easiest to nail down. Lunch and dinner have more variables, and I prepare enough for leftovers. I concentrate on protein first, and then add vegetables. Typically tempeh, tofu, or Field Roast products with roasted or sautéed vegetables. Today, I will be eating leftovers from last night. Two ounces of tempeh with four ounces of roasted vegetables that consist of red and yellow sweet peppers, sweet potatoes, small purple potatoes, zucchini, and carrots. I will add a tablespoon of olive oil-based spread, break up 3 walnuts to sprinkle of top, and garnish with two tablespoons of grated Parmesan cheese. This particular meal will be 19 grams of protein, 377 calories, and 28 grams of carbs. Bear in mind that I do eat more carbs when I am not working, and I focus on ingesting healthy carbs instead of breads/crackers/chips/crisps.
      It's a helluva journey and I'm thankful to be on it!
       
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    ×