What makes you say "feck 'em"?

[Indigo1991 1,612]

Had my surgery in April 2013 and my life is unrecognisable from then until now. My mind is unrecognisable never mind my body, lol. I am happy and nothing in life is a problem...

Luckily for me that's what keeps me smiling when an acquaintance repeatedly tells mutual friends she is just waiting for me to "pile the weight back on".

Hell will be freezing over before I give her the satisfaction of seeing me gain a pound. But what a sad life she must have if taking pleasure in waiting for someone to fail is the highlight of her life.

The old me would have fretted about whether she might have a point. The new me says "feck her". And if she ever says it to my face, that's the gist of what I will say to her. Not very sophisticated - but I think it would be very effective in shutting her up once and for all!

[LipstickLady 25,682]

My SIL is the same way. We were always dieting buddies and she had loads of fun making fun of another friend who was constantly losing and gaining. The last time she really spoke to me was when she was trash talking this friend. I asked her if she spoke of me this way when I failed another diet. Totally pissed her off.

She has no idea I had surgery and we went without seeing each other for about six months after. She went from gloating about being a size smaller than me to outweighing me by 100+ pounds. Whoooooops!

Even better? Her aunt is always on her to lose weight and now uses me as an example. Snort!

I love how much she hates me.

[Healthy_life2 8,319]

My sister in law takes pleasure in bringing everyone around her down. Her favorite target is me. I was in a very dark place at my highest weight. She loved to talk about me to friends and family members.

I use her as my motivation to keep going. I am so happy and living life I don't have time for the toxic people that just can't find their own happiness.

My biggest feck her is reaching my goal and running in the race for the cure. I'm doing this in memory of my mother in law and my mother. Can't wait!

[Miss Mac 6,261]

Hey there, Indigo1991,

Wouldn't you just love to confront her and ask her how long she is going to wait before she gives up and moves on to spreading viscious gossip about someone else?

[Indigo1991 1,612]

Hey, Miss Mac! I would love to do that - but there's probably more fun to be had with her saying what she's saying as everyone knows I had the surgery -except her :-)))) She will eventually be very confused...

Jenn1, good for you, using your IL's bad attitude to drive you on to do a good, positive thing is perfect. Good luck in the race!

Lipstick, revenge is a dish best served cold - enjoy....

[VSGAnn2014 12,992]

Lipstick ... I love how much she hates you, too.

[ProudGrammy 8,322]

happy and nothing in life is a problem... acquaintance tells mutual friends she is just waiting for me to "pile the weight back on".

@@Indigo1991

been a while girlfriend

nice to see your smiling face again!!!!

glad life continues to treat you well

it is so nasty how people can think and say/whisper/gossip

i don't "think" my family does, but i never know with a couple of my sisters

one time i was at the drug store

i was casually talking to the cashier

we see each other at the store alot, and we've discussed my WLS

one day we were talking - lady behind me jumped into the conversation saying something like,

"geez, i sure hope you don't regain the weight. i know that happens alot!!!"

R U kidding me????

i couldn't think fast enough what to say, i was ready to leave - BOY was i ready to leave

people can be amazing - just like your "friend"

good for you that she isn't bothering you - why should she??

you are the one that is the smart "cookie"

see you around the neighborhood

stay well and happy with life

kathy

Edited September 22, 2014 by proudgrammy

[feedyoureye 3,087]

People do say "I see you haven't gained the weight back" and I just say "thats right". No one has been really mean to my face, except one guy that I work with who told me he liked how I looked a lot better before I lost the weight...but who knows about behind my back?! I sure have gained lost gained lost in the past, like just about everybody else on diets. It really is normal to gain it all back. We are abnormal ladies and gents! And SOOOO happy for it!

[Who Dat 70461 331]

Use her bitterness to motivate you!

One of my favorites..."I want to inspire people. I want someone to look at me and say, “because of you I didn’t give up!”

By the way...what the heck's a "feck"?!?!

Edited September 23, 2014 by Who Dat 70461

[Beni 1,484]

That's it, thank you, I have decided. I am not telling anyone about my surgery. This is my journey and I don't think I could handle those comments.

Only my husband knows and that's because someone has to pick me up from the hospital, LOL. I did wonder if the hospital would release me to a taxi driver. But then I came to my senses - Somebody has to know, just in case.

[☠carolinagirl☠ 18,721]

Had my surgery in April 2013 and my life is unrecognisable from then until now. My mind is unrecognisable never mind my body, lol. I am happy and nothing in life is a problem...

Luckily for me that's what keeps me smiling when an acquaintance repeatedly tells mutual friends she is just waiting for me to "pile the weight back on".

Hell will be freezing over before I give her the satisfaction of seeing me gain a pound. But what a sad life she must have if taking pleasure in waiting for someone to fail is the highlight of her life.

The old me would have fretted about whether she might have a point. The new me says "feck her". And if she ever says it to my face, that's the gist of what I will say to her. Not very sophisticated - but I think it would be very effective in shutting her up once and for all!

ugliness/jealousy is a nasty thing and its on HER

as you indingo dont have a mean/nasty bone in your body

some people see your (success aka healthier body/healthier mind) as a reminder

to them of what they (cant or havent chose) to do yet....and that is get well

you have

you did

you are

atta girl

[Beni 1,484]

Yeh, on the not telling anyone I was doing gastric bypass: as I went through the hypothetical horrors phase, it dawned on me, it wouldn't be good if mom just went missing. My poor husband and children! I know it's not funny but I burst out laughing every time I think about it. This is the reality of the shame, stigma and hang ups that obese individuals carry.

Now, absolutely no one NOT GOING through the bariatric surgery decision process would understand these sort of thoughts, right?

[TEXASLADY52 264]

I didn't tell anyone except a few at work and they have been very supportive. I have been on so many diets. I could lose but could never keep it off. I also don't want anyone looking at me like "I thought she had WLS ...I can't tell she has lost " I friend and her daughter stopped by Sunday.....her daughter preceded to tell me that several ladies in her office had WLS and they "looked so old and had lost al of their hair"....REALLY! My husband's family has been so cruel over the years because of my weight. I threatened my husband if he told any of his family. I just want to see their faces when they do see me and I have lost my weight.....I just want to smile real big and then listen them run their mouths about if they think I am sick or something terrible is wrong with me. Only we know all the demons we have faught with our weight problems. Everyone.....Keep your heads high and keep on smiling knowing you are winning the race.

[Beni 1,484]

Amen, I am so with you on this TEXAS LADY. It is nobody's business. It makes sense to tell the ones that support you because they are your safety net. They can be supportive through the hard times.

This is deeply personal decision for everyone. I am not here to judge anyone's choices. We do what we need to survive. Later I may feel different about not telling anyone, of course. But pre-surgery, I stand ALONE!

[lisacaron 5,075]

It really is very sad how some people treat you when you are obese. I know there are discriminatory laws but that doesn't stop people and words cut deeper and cause lasting scars that can be difficult to fully heal from.

Me...I have a thick skin, I don't give a feck who knows about my surgery and if you have an issue with my weight...I don't give a feck about that either because that is YOUR issue not mine.

I remember this shirt I saw once on someone that said I may be fat but I can lose weight, but you will always be ugly.

It was raw....and it was offensive but I can see where the person was wearing it as a defense against all the people that I'm sure were talking behind his back.

They think we don't know or we can't hear them..but we do and we can, and this loud mouth NYC gal has no problem telling you off. You don't know my journey so take a good long look in the mirror before you judge me, and just remember your issues with me are just that YOUR issues!

I had an incident last week at a Wendy's some B**ch cut me off in the drive through lane, I was there to get dinner for my step son. I had a heck of a day at work and just wanted to get through get my chicken nugget meal and go home. They saw me there but they boxed me out. Her Husband boyfriend what ever he was rolled down the window and I said you saw me here, you really needed to do that?

So he started cursing me out...I won't repeat most of the words, but one part was your a whale your disgusting....I have to tell you have a low boiling point and if we were in the store I probably would have punched him in the face...but in this case I just simmered...swallowed and when he said I was a whale I asked him if he owned a mirror? He was a fat bald pretty gross dude I would not give the time of day to.

When he said your disgusting I told him so was his mother....yeah needless to say that got him! I dared him to get out of the car...but he was more of a chicken then chicken nuggets at Wendy's and besides thanks to Onstar the police were on their way and the conversation of him being a lunatic was recorded.

I won't let anyone put me down. No one lives in this body but me and no one knows what I go through every breathing moment but me. If anyone has a problem with it the problem is all theirs and if they try to make it mine I will cram it right back down their throats

OK rant over for now. It was good to get that out!