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What Was Your Final "straw That Broke The Camels Back"



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I have so many, but the final straw that literally made me schedule an appointment was when my Job hired a new executive over my department after firing my boss and she asked me to stay after her introductory team meeting. I distinctly remember feeling my heart sink because I just knew it was going to be bad. She told me people had made complaints that they could see my stomach underneath my shirt and that I needed to buy longer shirts. I have had my feelings hurt a lot in my life being overweight, but this was one of my worst moments. I remember holding back tears and trying to make it seem like I wasn't upset, but I literally could've walked out of her office that day and quit. It happened on a friday and I spent all weekend doing research and on Monday morning I called a Doctor and made an appointment for consultation.

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42 minutes ago, happyhappyjoyjoy said:

I have so many, but the final straw that literally made me schedule an appointment was when my Job hired a new executive over my department after firing my boss and she asked me to stay after her introductory team meeting. I distinctly remember feeling my heart sink because I just knew it was going to be bad. She told me people had made complaints that they could see my stomach underneath my shirt and that I needed to buy longer shirts. I have had my feelings hurt a lot in my life being overweight, but this was one of my worst moments. I remember holding back tears and trying to make it seem like I wasn't upset, but I literally could've walked out of her office that day and quit. It happened on a friday and I spent all weekend doing research and on Monday morning I called a Doctor and made an appointment for consultation.

This reminds me of one place I worked, a branch office with the main office in NYC. The landlord of the building sent a bill to the accounting department in NYC for the toilet seat, which the landlord claimed was broken because of the larger women in our office. Several overweight women worked there, but I was the largest. I don't think I broke the toilet seat there ever (the repair guys used to stand on it to repair something above it in the bathroom--a vent, maybe, or the light?) but how do you defend against something like that? Humiliating.

That wasn't my final straw at all, but the humiliation--I feel you pain. Sorry you had that experience.

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so much... but mostly im tired of feeling invisible..

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I took my kids to Knott's berry Farm and we were so excited about going on this particular roller coaster together. They ran head and took a ride first and I noticed when they were coming to get me for us to go they were walking really slow. When they got to me I said c'mon lets go, and my daughter looked at me with the saddest look on her face and said "Mom, you're not gonna fit." I put on a happy face and told them it was no big deal and they should run along and have fun riding the rides. After they took off I sat down on the bench and just cried. When we got home I made the appt and now my surgery is November 2 and I CANT WAIT!!

Sent from my LG-TP450 using BariatricPal mobile app

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My surgury is Nov 13/17. I went back and forth about my decision for the last 3 years. I am mid fifties. In my head I'm 39 and my body lately feels 70. My knee's, back, reflux, hibernating, not working in Real Estate like I should be, not socializing and networking like I use to, worried about fatty liver and apnea, osteoarthritis and not putting myself out there to meet a partner, not getting a dog again because I am worried I can't keep up with the walks...Wow what a list. I need to loose 60 pounds now, but I have yoyod from 150 to 250. I have already had skin surgery after loosing 100 pounds on my own but now have gained 60 back again.....I feel the surgery will really help to keep it off as well as continued counselling . I want to live and enjoy my life!

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10 hours ago, Angelika said:

My surgury is Nov 13/17. I went back and forth about my decision for the last 3 years. I am mid fifties. In my head I'm 39 and my body lately feels 70. My knee's, back, reflux, hibernating, not working in Real Estate like I should be, not socializing and networking like I use to, worried about fatty liver and apnea, osteoarthritis and not putting myself out there to meet a partner, not getting a dog again because I am worried I can't keep up with the walks...Wow what a list. I need to loose 60 pounds now, but I have yoyod from 150 to 250. I have already had skin surgery after loosing 100 pounds on my own but now have gained 60 back again.....I feel the surgery will really help to keep it off as well as continued counselling . I want to live and enjoy my life!

I believe this surgery is missing tool you need in your toolbox! Cheers to your decision to go through with it and begin a new chapter in life!

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Good for you,

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Best of luck. After my surgery I kicked my self for not doing it sooner.

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Went on a trip of a lifetime and was miserable most of the time because my feet hurt and I couldn't keep up to doing everything I wanted.

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I had a few that all happened around the same time:

  • Realizing I was over 300 pounds - my highest weight was 311
  • Not being able to fasten an airplane seat-belt without asking for a seat-belt extender
  • Getting tired more often
  • Having to buy bigger and bigger clothes, not fitting into clothes that were already my "fat" clothes
  • Not being able to look in the mirror without becoming very upset about how I looked
  • I stopped taking selfies, I stopped wanting to be in pictures

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Honestly, I don't remember. It was right after my birthday and I had spent the week pigging out. I felt so fat and disgusting. I don't think there was any one thing I can point to other than I wasn't able to get myself under control.

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What was the final thing that you encountered that made you say this is enough? I have had numerous.

1. Lack of energy and disinterested in activities that used to make me extremely happy.

2. Missing out on my son's first time at Six Flags since I couldn't buckle the seat belt on the first big roller coaster he wanted to ride and explaining to him afterwards why I couldn't go on (combination of anger at myself and wanting to cry)

3. Not being comfortable at all flying because the seat is too small, seat belt very tight but can't put tray table down

4. Avoiding restaurant booths with tiny seats

5. Nickname big guy every job I've ever had by some skinny boss

6. Custom dress shirts needed to get a collar big enough to close to wear suits to work and still very tight and uncomfortable

For me, trying three different kinds of expensive prescription weight loss pills / appetite suppressants (Contrave, Belviq, and Phentermine) only to watch the scale continue to grow over the past six months was my breaking point that I needed to do something drastic.

Thanks so much for the support,

Jim

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Congrats on taking this step to improve your health! There’s a wealth of knowledge and experiences here! This forum has been a great help during the recovery process. Feel free to reach out and post something if you ever have questions or converns! Best wishes!

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8 hours ago, tennisboy11 said:

Thanks so much for the support

While not exactly the same as your experiences, Jim, I sense several identical moments.

Planes, restaurant seating, work prejudices in particular.

The assumption by some colleagues that big/fat/obese EQUALS stupid. So many assumed I was ... much to their amazement in the days/months afterwards.

My obesity rarely affected anything to do with my work competence despite others' initial expectations.

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While not exactly the same as your experiences, Jim, I sense several identical moments.
Planes, restaurant seating, work prejudices in particular.
The assumption by some colleagues that big/fat/obese EQUALS stupid. So many assumed I was ... much to their amazement in the days/months afterwards.
My obesity rarely affected anything to do with my work competence despite others' initial expectations.

You’re absolutely right about the prejudices. I am convinced I have been passed over for at least two promotions during my career because I didn’t look like my bosses, I am taller, and yes bigger. All I can do is take the high road, it was their loss and they actually lost me because of it. I am fortunate to be working with a company that appreciates what’s between my ears not what’s under my suit jacket. I can’t wait for the plane seat to fit better traveling 30% of the time, just can’t wait. Best of luck to you!!


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